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Original poster

I wish I had nice neighbours

35 replies

ROUS · 14/11/2012 17:44

My neighbour has just deliberately picked a verbal fight with me. It's not the first time. Evidently we said 'Good Morning' to his wife in an aggressive manner. His shed is botch job, upside down wall and bad felt job but somehow it's our fault it leaks.

I don't want a 'best' friend living next door but it would be nice to have someone to occasionally smile at and be nice to my children.

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 14/11/2012 17:47

Aww that's crap ROUS. Sad How can you say Good Morning aggressively? Confused

LadyMaryChristmas · 14/11/2012 17:47

There's a house for sale two doors away from me. Why don't you move here? Smile

Sparklingbrook · 14/11/2012 17:49

There's one up my road too. It's not wildly exciting up my road but everybody is very lovely.

catwomanlikesmeatballs · 14/11/2012 17:54

I like that I wouldn't be able to pick any of my neighbours out of a line up. The best neighbours are the ones that you don't even know are there. Your neighbour sounds like an arse, ignore, any interaction feeds the agression.

Ilovewaleswhenitrains · 14/11/2012 17:58

I'll swap, my next door neighbours are a family of 3 adult sons and the Mum, one son is alcoholic and regularly beats up one of his brothers. They won't press charges against him. I am so sick of phoning 999 when I hear the shouting, thumps through the wall and screaming. It's not what I want my kids hearing (obviously don't want violence between adults either).

Bonsoir · 14/11/2012 18:01

Oh dear Sad.

I have lovely neighbours - we all chat in the hall/lift and the children play together and babysit one another. It is very nice, I agree.

Original poster
ROUS · 14/11/2012 18:32

Catwoman any interaction feeds the agression - that's what DH said, and our both right.

iI's taken me several years to realise that actually they don't want to get on, they don't want any neighbours. He actually said today "We were here first" as if that explained why he reverses his caravan into our fence.

So pleased that some of you have nice/neutral neighbours. The next four nearest are all lovely - not in our pockets but good in an emergency.

OP posts:
blanksquit · 14/11/2012 18:35

Me too. Both side aren't much cop. I just don't say much to them these days. I try not to be aggressive with my "hellos".

DuchessofMalfi · 14/11/2012 19:09

That's horrible ROUS. He sounds just like our neighbour - he's a complete arse. He's a thug and a bully who has upset and angered us, our neighbours on the other side of us, and several other people on our road. He's vile, and best avoided. Don't bother speaking to him any more ROUS - we don't speak to ours.

LettyAshton · 14/11/2012 19:15

"We were here first" ha ha

Sounds like my neighbour - are you the other side?! When we moved in I went round to introduce myself and was met with a mega cat's bum from the wife and "We were so disappointed when we heard a family was moving in." They were determined to be as unpleasant and unreasonable as possible from the word go.

freddiefrog · 14/11/2012 19:39

Our next door neighbour is deeply unpleasant. We completely ignore them now.

They're arseholes to everyone, and as there's only 8 houses in our little estate, he sticks out like a sore thumb.

They've offended everyone here since they moved in 2 years ago

We had a street party for the royal wedding. They were invited but instead of joining in, getting to knitter neighbours, etc, the bloke came out of his house, drove his car off his drive and parked it in the middle of the communal grass area we were all sitting in before buggering off back indoors. Most strange

DuchessofMalfi · 14/11/2012 20:16

There really are some bastards out there, aren't there? DH has a theory that it's living in close proximity on housing estates that brings out the worst in some people (and the best in others I hasten to add :)). Some people, lile our neighbour and yours freddiefrog and Letty simply should not live on estates. No-one should have to put up with that kind of attitude from a neighbour.

Original poster
ROUS · 14/11/2012 20:36

At first we thought it was just us and we kept a dignified silence. Gradually people started to ask about them and accompany it with a look Hmm

It's comforting to find we are not alone.

OP posts:
Original poster
ROUS · 14/11/2012 20:40

My parents always got on, with a bit of give and take, with our neighbours. I still get Christmas cards from them, both sides.

One summer it was really hot and one lot got a load of concrete for an extension, - it had got 'lost' on the way to widening the M25. Half the street pitched in to barrow that to the right place before it set.

OP posts:
UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea · 14/11/2012 20:44

We moved into our house 3 years ago, our neighbours were so offended by our outrageous behaviour they sold up and moved. Our list of crimes included

(1) existing.
(2) breathing.
(3) not being invisible.
(4) passing in front of their house to get to ours (at the end of a lane, so no other option).

They used to completely ignore my little girl who would toddle up to them at aged 2 or 3 to say hello Angry . They are not on our Christmas Card list.

Our new neighbours are lovely :)

freddiefrog · 14/11/2012 20:47

My parents always got on with their neighbours too. They're still in touch 10 years after they moved away. One side were really close.

The neighbours we had before theymoved in we're lovely and all the rest of us get on really well.

They are just complete and utter arseholes. Rude, obnoxious and generally unpleasant.

They are roundly ignored by all of us now. We have several get togethers with the rest of the neighbours - New Year's Eve parties, BBQs in the summer but they'd never come to any of them. Following the Royal Wedding street party stunt, they don't get invited

freddiefrog · 14/11/2012 20:51

Ooops, posted to soon.

They don't get invited, but then moan we don't make them feel welcome. Is there any wonder?

We don't all have to be best buddies, but we do all live in a smallish estate, in the middle of nowhere so have to get on to a certain degree. They don't have to be our friends, or even speak to us if they don't want to. Just stop acting like complete and utter wankers

SugarplumMary · 15/11/2012 11:11

"DH has a theory that it's living in close proximity on housing estates that brings out the worst in some people "

Interesting - first time we've lived on an estate - something built at same time and first time we've had issues. It's our first semi-detached and it's the neighbour we are not connected to who can't leave us be. They refused to talk to us but can't seem to stop talking about us.

Lived in flats and much older terrenced house with huge mix of people there with no issues what so ever.

DuchessofMalfi · 15/11/2012 12:19

Sugarplum - I think what DH was thinking was that on housing estates there are people who are moving upwards into bigger houses, and people downsizing who were used to bigger houses, more space around them, all being thrown into the mix.

Whereas some people downsizing are absolutely fine with the reduced space, others struggle with having neighbours "in their face" as they see it.

We've gradually moved upwards to our house and have been met with hostility from various neighbours, mostly elderly who see the estate as being a retirement estate even though the houses are family-sized. Our children are young and don't play outside but our neighbours' children did when they first moved in but don't now because of the open hostility and aggression they received when playing out on their bikes/scooters etc. It's an increasingly uncomfortable situation which won't improve unless more families move onto our estate.

sweetkitty · 15/11/2012 12:40

Our neighbours probably hate us Grin

Were building an extension, the 1st set of plans they objected to, wrote a huge letter to the council most of it untrue, council agreed to extension! It was going to cost too much do we've downsized it, they were fine with this but are stilly unhappy about how close the extension is to their house. We are building legally to our boundary, there was issues with access as well.

But the best bit was when I sent a text to DH moaning about the neighbour and sent it to her Angry I was in tears. I've since apologised but they still hate us!

DuchessofMalfi · 15/11/2012 12:46

There's nothing like building works to get the neighbours hating you :o. That's how our nextdoor neighbours started their (one-sided) feud with us.

They objected to us extending our driveway (nowhere near their property, but they still thought there was reason to moan), and then they objected to our plans to extend our kitchen, issuing threats to the builders, us, the kitchen fitters/suppliers, the Council's Building Control officer and anyone else concerned. A vile jealousy thing we concluded - they couldn't afford to do any works to their house so thought they would just try and scupper ours. Bastards Angry.

sweetkitty · 15/11/2012 12:50

Apparently according to our builders extension jealousy is rife, he said it is often the wife who objects. We've tried to be as sympathetic as we can, there's no windows along their side so to speak (were detached) its just the houses will look closer together but there's nothing we can really do about it (we couldn't build the other way).

TantrumsAndBalloons · 15/11/2012 12:54

My new neighbours are running either a brothel or a crack house.

Its not much fun watching a seemingly endless parade of men going in and out.

OldBagWantsNewBag · 15/11/2012 12:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SugarplumMary · 15/11/2012 13:01

I suppose you at least know the cause sweetkitty and it may well die down when the work is all done with and the disruption is all over.

Our crime seems to be to exist - that we were a family. I think DuchessofMalfi?s DH is on to something - may try and factor that in when we move.

It?s not the original buyers on our estate who are now quiet old that cause the issues they often seem to like young DC it is the second wave like our problem neighbours.

Now I think about it the two other families down our road trying to move have neighbours like ours - family late teenagers early adults DC with late 50 early 60s parents. You get noise from the teenagers/young adult for few years while they live there or visit but open hostility lack of consideration to young DC from the parents.

You?re just not going to get that age range buying these houses they are family sized.

It is hard not to take it personally at times ?though I understand from the things they complain about its not based on any logic it?s just ?us?. We will move away soon hopefully.