To leave my six year old in charge?

[WelshMaenad]

I have just started a new job, working nights. I worked Friday night, last night off. I'm working tonight, Monday night and Tuesday night.

We have 2 DCs, aged 6.5 and 2.5. Little one is in playgroup Tues and Thurs morning, will be swapping tues for Mon as will always be working a Sunday night, but can't do this until next week as playgroup has been closed for half term. I'll therefore have him with me all day on Monday, and he rarely naps so not much chance to sleep in the day.

DH was supposed to be off today, working Monday, then off Tues and Weds. My plan was to sleep as much as I could today as chances will be limited on Monday, then catch up on Tuesday and Wednesday.

However, there was some work crisis and he has now gone into work for a full day, completely buggering up my well laid plans!

Bearing in mind that the door will be locked and they have no access to anything sharp/poisonous/deadly, WIBU to snooze on the sofa while they play and are babysat by cbeebies and tell my six year old to wake me if there's a problem? She's pretty sensible, I've left her at home for a few minutes at a time to pop to corner shop etc. I just feel a bit weird about it for some reason.

You probably feel weird about it because you know YABU.

I think dozing on the sofa with them playing in the room is perfectly acceptable and under the circumstances, the only choice you have.

I used to do the same and have now graduated to going to bed and leaving the 6 and 7 year old downstairs watching TV. They have strict instructions about what they are and are not allowed to do. I have a 'mums' sleep' which means I get to sleep but have half an ear open to any unusual sounds.

I take the front door key upstairs with me, the 7 year old can be a bit of an escapologist.

what you are actually asking is "would it be ok to have a down day & snooze on the sofa?" - what in the same room as your children??? Of course it would, what would you do it you were unwell - exactly the same.

Would it be the best way to arrange your life so it had to happen like that all the time? No, obviously not. But as a one off to get through a specific period of time? I wouldn't give it a 2nd thought.

If you're asleep in the same room as them, then it's fine. I just left my nearly 5 year old with my nearly 10 month DS for about 10 mins whilst I went upstairs to put clothes away and I came back to him eating a jaffa cake. If you don't mind things like that then it's ok.

I think dozing on the sofa is fine, TBH.

As long as the house is safe then of course its ok.

Ordinarily I wouldn't be working this many shifts, no. Just Sunday night (and an rearranging playgroup to cover Monday morning) and any utter shifts by arrangement, and I plan to pick shifts where DH is off the next day. I was just asked to cover staff sickness this week so have the three in a row.

YANBU. You are there, they will be fine.

When my DC were little I did that accidentally many a time.

Fakebook, I would have a massive problem with them not getting me a Jaffa cake too, to be honest!

Yes it's fine. I would draw the line at going upstairs to bed though, but I have a 4 year old & 1 year old, so that bit less reliable.

I think dozing on the sofa would be fine.

DH does an occasional night shift, and will doze on the sofa if the kids are around and I have to be elsewhere and it's fine. It's never proper sleep and he's always kind of aware of what's going on

So did I Sparkling!.

One minute I was sitting on the settee watching The Treacle people with them next thing I know I'm getting WAKE UP MUMMY!!!!! yelled in my ear Tutt.

sorry I didn't mean to imply that you had arranged your life so it was the ordinary course of things - I thought it was fairly obvious from your post that it was a one off. And if you did it all the time you wouldn't even be asking the question anyway.

Right - get off MN and go to sleep!!

Sparkling! I often have a nap now, I just go upstairs!

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Me too Tutt (13 and 10)

Dozing on the sofa is fine but I wouldn't leave a 6 year old while I went to the shop

I used to do this when I worked nights! I would doze on sofa, children would watch Mary Poppins, it was the longest film we had, gave me loads of shut eye! Just beware of children answering the phone..my daughter told someone who rang and asked to speak to mum that she was alone......I was asleep upstairs and hubby was in the garage, attached to our house....

I regularly need to lay down. Currently propped up in bed on a pile of cushions, field of hot water bottles, waiting for drugs to take effect. DS (3) is playing quite contently in the next room (we have a bungalow). There's a chain on the door, and he comes to check in with me regularly.

Needs must sometimes.

Dozing on the sofa in the same room as them is OK. I do this. They are three feet away and I can hear them as I doze.

However, no, I wouldn't ever leave them alone in the house whilst I went out even for a few minutes. It's not fair on the 6 year old, nor is it safe.

Mine are 2.10 and 6 BTW.

you are only dozing and you will hear them not as if you are going to bed with earplugs in I am not sure you would fall into a deep sleep anyway just do it

Just a little thought for the future. Have you got any tame teens lying around? Neighbours kids, relatives? They may want to earn a little bit of pocket money while learning responsibility. Ultimately you would still be responsible, as you are in the house, but you could sleep properly, knowing that there is someone older looking after your DC.

my mother did this every day of my childhood. if i was at home, i was in charge of four-years-younger brother while she slept in the afternoon, if not, he was left to wander, including on the main road.

she was a bad mother. she had her good points and she seems to be dying now so i don't want to think badly of her, but in some ways, she was a very bad mother.