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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Feeling Scared AIBU

29 replies

sadie3 · 20/10/2012 11:28

Three years ago I got someone to make my DS a train set for his birthday, the guy delivered it to my house, since then I have been receiving FB requests from various different men all of whom had no other friends. Today I received another request, when I checked all of these men link back to the train guy. Either the train guy is making FB aliases or he?s told his weird friends about me. Now I feel scared as he knows where I live. What should I do ? Is it U to feel scared or am I being silly?

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BeaWheesht · 20/10/2012 11:30

But strange but I wouldn't be scared I'd just hide myself on Facebook nd reject the requests.

zombieplanmum · 20/10/2012 11:31

How did they link back to the train guy? I would contact facebook and ask them to investigate, can you do this? Otherwise tell him in no uncertain terms that if he contacts you again, you will call the police. He may have your address, but i also assume you have his - go to the police.

WorraLiberty · 20/10/2012 11:32

It's a bit odd but I wouldn't worry about it.

Just remove yourself from the Facebook search function.

WorraLiberty · 20/10/2012 11:33

You can't go to the Police because someone's sending you Facebook requests.

Well you can, but I'm quite sure they'd give you more than a Confused face...

Original poster
sadie3 · 20/10/2012 11:35

The other guys are now friends with him or someone he knows (he only has 20 friends and 10 of them have friend requested me over the course of 3 years). He even went to the trouble of making a FB with a photo of a hot guy as a profile pic. I only just clicked it was the train guy today.
Just to add Ive not accepted any of the friend requests.

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WorraLiberty · 20/10/2012 11:37

If he's going to all that trouble, I wonder why he hasn't hidden his friend list from public view?

Original poster
sadie3 · 20/10/2012 11:42

I have no idea.

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WorraLiberty · 20/10/2012 11:43

Oh well opt out of the search function and the weirdo guy can't send you any more FRs.

WitchesTit · 20/10/2012 11:47

Are you and train guy Facebook friends? If he found you on Facebook just from the train set then your profile is too visible.

To be fair, train guy got some custom out of you and so may have 'passed you on' (in an innocent way!) to people who make stuff in the hope you might be interested in what they make.

HeinousHecate · 20/10/2012 11:52

just keep ignoring. It seems likely that he's creating these to try to fb friend you. But if that's all he's doing, then just ignore him.

He hasn't tried to phone you, hasn't come to your house, you've not noticed anyone following you. In three years, if this is all he has done, then - although I am no expert - I'd say it's unlikely to escalate now.

You can adjust your fb so you're hidden. Try that.

Original poster
sadie3 · 20/10/2012 11:53

My profile is not visible only my name (which is unusual) If he passed me on why do the other people only have one friend? I can only assume its him. Im going to email him and ask him not to keep on adding me or give my name to his so called friends.

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HeinousHecate · 20/10/2012 11:59

I think you can actually make your name non searchable.

Original poster
sadie3 · 20/10/2012 12:00

How do you do that HH?

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missymoomoomee · 20/10/2012 12:02

When I had FB I used to get requests from people who were friends of friends. Some people just like to have numbers of friends on there rather than actual ones. Why don't you block train guy?

HeinousHecate · 20/10/2012 12:03

some info here

I was sure I read somewhere that you can make it so your name doesn't appear if someone searches for it

HeinousHecate · 20/10/2012 12:04

oh, you can control who can message you and send you friend requests, so that would get rid of him too.

NotQuintAtAllOhNo · 20/10/2012 12:08

My facebook settings are really high. I am not searchable, and only friends or friends of friends can message me or send me friend requests.

You need to go into your account settings and increase your security.

MainlyMaynie · 20/10/2012 12:09

Has he requested you in his own name? Have you blocked each of the men who have requested you?

Original poster
sadie3 · 20/10/2012 12:10

Thank you.

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Original poster
sadie3 · 20/10/2012 12:12

MM, he has requested me first as his own name and subsequently as aliases or friends who only have one friend all of which are linked back to his 20 friends.

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Original poster
sadie3 · 20/10/2012 12:14

This morning I asked the guy that friend requested me if I knew him (before I sussed out it was the train guy) he just messaged me "no"

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WorraLiberty · 20/10/2012 12:15

Don't contact him, just tighten your privacy settings.

Original poster
sadie3 · 20/10/2012 12:19

I just asked why he was asking to be friends with me and he said hes not been on FB long and it was a mistake, he would have had to know my name or search for me out of millions of people so its not a coincidence. There are some really weird people out there.

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WorraLiberty · 20/10/2012 12:21

Yep, hence the privacy settings being useful.

Original poster
sadie3 · 20/10/2012 12:23

All done. Thank you for your help. I told the guy that if I get another friend request I will report them.

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