To want DD to nap in her cot?

[nm123]

DD is 9.5mo and I've struggled with her naps since birth.

We recently went on holiday where she fell into an AMAZING routine of awake at 7ish, nap at 9-9:30 for 1.5-2.5 hrs, then another nap at 1:30-2ish for another 1.5-2 hrs... All naps on holiday were in the maclaren, with a snoozeshade over her.

Since we've got home on Saturday it has been impossible to get her to nap in the cot. Shell go to bed in the cot at night but will.not.nap there. Anyone would think I'd told her the worst news ever when she goes in there - the crying, spluttering, choking is incredible. In the buggy she'll go down for ages....

We had made some progress before we went away and she would be ok in the cot but now she sits herself up and shakes her head whilst crying too and it almost breaks my heart.

I don't know whether to tough it out and insist on the cot or stick with the buggy?

Sorry, should've added that I'm worried that bedtime in the cot will become an issue if she gets to used to being rocked to sleep in the buggy for naps. Plus I'd worked bloody hard pre-hols to get rid of all 'props' so now back to square one it feels.

If she'll sleep soundly in the buggy for naps why not just leave her there. If she sleeps in there at night why bother with the crying, spluttering and choking. Im a firm believer that the cot should be left for bedtime only, so they now when its bedtime and when its just naptime.

I agree with voter, let her nap in her buggy if she's happy to do that.

FWIW my DS is about the same age as your DD and he has never napped in his cot, always in his pushchair or on the sofa and it hasn't affected him going to bed in his cot every night without issue.

My 5 month old was sleeping through for ages but would only nap well in arms or moing buggy. Fretted lots about it, read books, started implementing a nap schedule of putting him in his crib for day naps yada yada. Result? wont bloody sleep at night. Stopped putting him in crib for day naps (back to lap/sofa/pram) voila=sleeping through.
Go with what works, doesnt matter if shes asleep in the pram does it?

DS has never napped in the cot. Ever.

He has only ever napped in the buggy. Still does now (2+ years old).

I'm of the mind that you work with the baby you have, not the one you don't. If I want him to nap in the house because I have something to do, then when he gets tired and grumpy, I push him round the block til he falls asleep, then come back and park him in the living room where he sleeps on quite happily. Otherwise, in the summer at any rate, it often gives me an hour plus of walking and fresh air, and some shopping time if I need it. Or sitting in a cafe reading....

One positive - having him nap in the buggy makes me a LOT more flexible in terms of being out and about. I know mums who get so tense about their schedules when they are out, because their babies/toddlers will 'only' sleep in a cot, so they have to make sure they are home at a certain time. (some of these mums do seem to spend a lot of their afternoon getting their dc to nap, too - I just won't get into those battles, life is too short).

I'd just go with the buggy and find the positives.

Cots always reminded me of cages, and for that reason I never bought one for my son. Perhaps your baby sees it that way too ...

I haven't got any solutions, but perhaps if you are creative with this and try different environments, locations, etc, you will find a way to make it work for you both ....

Keep letting her have naps in the buggy. Anything else sounds far too stressful. Besides if she is in the buggy you can pop out whilst she is sleeping. Result.

My DS never napped in his cot, it was either the buggy or the sofa.

Buggy or sofa here too. I thought I was being such a PFB weirdo. You have all made me feel much better.

MrsTerrys, funny, isn't it - I always thought 'but sleep is sleep, isn't it? wherever they do it!'

And just got on with it. Some very routiney or older friends and relations were all a bit freaked out that DS didn't nap in a cot - 'but where does he nap, then?' I was asked, in baffled concerned tones.

I told MIL I hung DS upside down like a bat in the spare room to nap. She looked at me wide eyed until I said 'that was a joke'. As someone who was BF-ing not FF-ing AND sometimes co-sleeping, she obvs thought I was capable of other monstrosities....

Thanks all.

I spent the first 4-5 months of DDs life pushing her round town trying to get her to nap! Made the baby blubber come off rapidly that's for sure..! Will stick with the buggy for now, only prob is that we're in a first floor flat so not really possible to hoik her and it downstairs!

My DS would only ever nap in the carseat (and on the move), gave naps up completely at 12m too so go with the buggy and long may it last!

I am one of those people rushing about so I can get home for my dd to nap in the cot. I look enviously on parents sauntering about town, browsing in shops whilst their children sleep away in the buggy. No chance of that with my dd. I agree with everyone who says just let her sleep where she's happiest.

I agree to let het nap whether she can. It will make her a happier baby if she's well rested, rather than have you both stressed from not napping in the cot.

DS only falls asleep in the car seat or the pushchair. I tried to get him to sleep in the cot, but at about 13 months he started sleeping through the night, and then I didn't want to change anything!

I have recently discovered that if he falls asleep in the car I can transfer him to the pushchair in the kitchen and he stays asleep, but he won't go in the cot as he doesn't want to lie flat. This was working fabulously, and allowed me to get some house work done, but unsurprisingly doesn't work when its raining!

Had the same issue but with the car seat. We decided we had to get tough, 1. because EVERYONE treated us like monsters because she wasn't in her cot, and 2. We knew we had to do it eventually as the car seat can't be used after 9 months.

It was horrible. I am a strong believer in 'as long as they are sleeping, leave them'... this thread makes me feel a lot better!

It didn't help that The Sun published an article about the dangers of prolonged sleeping time in the car seat, and how 2 babies had died. We had 3 people do the 'but it's not safe!'... made me feel awful

DD1 used to fall asleep in her carseat... I'd forgotten all about that! (she is now 11).
Somewhere there is a photo of her, aged at least two- possibly three- fast asleep in this first size, tiny carseat! I was a lone parent then so it really was anything for a quiet life...

DS is now almost 11 mo and had never been asleep in his cot in the day. Even when he was tiny. It's never affected his sleep pattern.

I've never actually tried. I've always thought as cot as nighttime.

I remember being all PFB with DC1 who would only nap on me in a wrap or in his swing at the highest setting - DC2 would only nap lying absolutely flat in the cot or her pram - DC3 (only 12 days so it's early days) I just don't care - wherever she sleeps is fine with me - as long as she's sleeping!

And, when I got bored with the above for whatever reason, then we worked on napping in the cot - but, like I said, that was when I didn't like it - got sore back from baby-in-wrap, for example - but the baby would have been happy to continue!

Just do what works, really

My DD is 8months and she only ever naps in the pram. Don't know why really, that's just what we've always done. She sleeps brilliantly in her cot at bedtime. Just do whatever works for you and your baby.

Thanks again. Feeling much better about buggy-naps now because of your comments.

I guess the nap thing is a hang up from our earlier days when DD was an AWFUL napper and I was literally out all day every day from 10-4 pushing her about. Because we live upstairs if she fell asleep whilst we were out, I'd have to keep walking as stopping would wake her. If we were indoors and she was getting tired I'd have to head out to get her to nap (left the base of the bugaboo in the stairwell and wasn't going to lug that up and down all day along with the carrycot bit too). It's a tad easier with the maclaren now.

She did get better at napping in the cot which I think is because I tried the "gradual retreat" method in the "What worked for us" thread. I stopped feeding her to sleep at night, moved her into her own room, grew a backbone and helped her learn to self settle. This buggy-napping feels a bit of a step backwards in that respect... She really protests when I put her in the buggy - banana-back, poker-straight legs, screwed up tantrum face, and wails for about 3 minutes the reverts to peaceful sleeping angel..... She never goes down without a fight (except for occasionally at bedtime) so I suppose I was hoping that might change if she's in the cot too.

Anyways..... Am learning to go with the flow s bit more. You're all right in that if it works for the time-being I may as well go with it for now... I'm sure both me and DD will evolve in the coming weeks and we'll end up in another pattern soon!!