to have told MIL off

[amieis]

DD has horrible weepy, bleeding nappy rash. MIL has just changed dds nappy and not bothered to wipe her down "because its only a bit of wee and a waste of wipes". Rather childishly I got a bit cross and a bit snippy at her about hygeine.
She's now sittng there looking like I've punched her in the face or something equally horrible.

wipes are not good for weeping bleeding nappy rash, cotton wool and boiled cooled water, plus no nappy if poss for a while. She meant well maybe put the kettle on and have a chat.

I don't think either of you were really really unreasonable, perhaps apologise about the way you said it and reiterate what you meant.
FWIW, I found using wipes seemed to encourage nappy rash in DD, she always seemed to have it, and she hasn't had it since I stopped using them. Also, metanium in the yellow tube is magical for horrible nappy rash

Wee doesn't cause nappy rash. Wet wipes will make it worse. She was actually better to leave it than wet wipe.

Use baby oil and cotton wool if it's really bad. Water can be quite drying to the skin. My DD had awful nappy rash once and lots of nappy off time, laying on a disposable change mat for accidents, really helped.

Was going to say cotton pads and water too, and bone dry bum before cream and fresh nappy hairdrier on cold setting works a treat

That yellow metanium cream is fab for nappy rash.

Wipes are no good for nappy rash at all OP - so you snapped at her needlessly.

Everyone has already said what I was going to say - cotton wool & water, metanium, nappy off time, cup of tea with an apology for snapping. Tell her you appreciate her help and support.

My ds used to react horribly to wipes too, if I used one I'd have to wipe him over with cotton wool and water after. Metanium is fab, would sort him out overnight.

I was just going to say what everyone else did: go easy on the wipes!

DD1 used to get nappy rash like that all the time. I could not use wipes or lotion, I had to carry a little plastic bowl, pure soap and cotton wool around with me all the time.

As PicaK says, metanium is great.