Neighbours

[mythical]

Yes, people have sex, it's completely natural and normal.
However :o I can hear them (more like her, to be fair) from my living room, through the conservatory/garden and it's not even my next door neighbours, they live 2 houses down (detached houses) :o she is wailing! and screaming! and it's (nearly 2 PM!)
Just thought i'd share it with you...

Call the police they'll them you can hear screwing!

Hahahahaha stupid iPhone autocorrect I of course meant screaming but my phone is filthy!

that fitted in too well!

Knock on the door and ask if she's OK, has she hurt herself, you heard screaming?

This reminds me of my friend who every Saturday night had nextdoors headboard banging against their shared wall along with yer one wailing "fuck me, fuck me harder..." My mate wanted to discreetly let them know but her dh advised her to say nothing as it might dampen their ardour and what the hell, everyone deserved a bit of fun on a Saturday. 5 years later and my pals are moving to Australia and are having a farewell party. First party they ever had whilst living in the house for 10 years, so the neighbours called the police complaining about the noise. My mate had a great deal of satisfaction explaining to the young police officer in front of neighbours and party goers exactly what she had had to put up with down through the years.

sorry OP

Oh, how quaint and romantic that they had a specific sex night

Two doors down?! The man must know she's faking be a legend!

You could apply for an Amazing Sex Behavioral Order (ASBO).

I sometimes worry that we're too loud though but I have to put up with next doors screaming at football/his wife so fairs fair.

Does anyone else ever worry that thir neighbours hear them? I'm sure we aren't that loud but it always worries me! (I'm not the neighbour by the way.. Was at work at 2pm and no conservatory.)

hermionestranger Your typo made me splutter my drink across the screen