Lift share let down

[SuzysZoo]

AIBU to think that if I share lifts with another mum from school, let's say to ballet which is a 20 min journey a week each way, she takes and I pick up each week, that it is unreasonable not to give me more than 2 days notice that her DD does not want to go any more and that I am stuck doing it both ways? Obviously I know she can't make her DD go, but 2 days!! From what I can gather, she must have known that this was brewing sooner. I'm going to have to run now but I'll check later to see if I am reasonable/unreasonable in being annoyed....

YANBU to be a bit 'aaarrggh' that's something else I've to fit into my day but

YABU to think she needs to give you more than 2 days notice. Would you like it in writing?

I think YABU. Sometimes my DCs have suddenly decided that they just want to suddenly stop an activity. Or perhaps she has been trying to persuade her daughter to go still but her daughter is adamant she doesn't want to go.

2 days' notice is plenty

YABU, what difference would more notice have made, if it's happening then there's nothing you can do about it.

She probably decided over the Easter holidays but only just got round to telling you

YAB a bit U

DCs do suddenly decide they don't want to do something.

It may have been as simple as she needed to pay this terms fees and asked her DD this week if she really wanted to do it and the DD said "No" in which case she has given you as much notice as she can.

Actually YABU! Her DD doesnt want to go anymore and now she has told you! I would never put my DS into an activity if I knew I couldnt take and collect just in case.............anoying but yes, it's totally up to her and at least she didnt drop you in it on the actual day.

You're quite right - she should be doing her share of the drop offs/pick ups just for your DD (leave hers at home or whatever) until she's done her full months notice.

Not

It depends upon whether the lift sharing was because you cannot get/pick up your dd and you NEEDED the lift. If you absolutely needed her to do her share because you couldn't, and your friend knew that - then yes 2 days is unreasonable.

However, if you can do both the drop off and pick up but are just sharing to make life a bit easier on ballet day - then it isn't much of a problem really.

Basically did your friend leave you in the poo?

oh poo - I am unreasonable. I think the thing that pissed me off was just that her email made it seem like she had known for ages that it was a possibility (but had not told me). She used to ask me "you're not going to stop ballet are you?" and I'd say, "don't worry, I'll give you lots of notice if that is likely". Plus you need to give a month's notice, so I didn't get the chance to do that. It's not impossible for me to take DD, but pretty hard.

yanu, sorry

She might be having financial difficulty. I have been in a similar situation where I had to suddenly tighten belts.