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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

they're my boobs!

18 replies

LauraDudleyHulme · 29/11/2011 20:36

After having my first child and breast feeding my upper half while it is slightly bigger (B cup up from an A) they are not exactly pert! I'm now 5 months pregnant with my 2nd child and I've been considering breast surgery when my next child is about 18 months old. I've been researching it and I casually mentioned it to my other half and he went mad! Saying he loves me for me, not having plastic t**s! But he can't see that its for.myself.not him...aibu??!

OP posts:
cavegirl123 · 29/11/2011 21:28

fter my 3 yrs of having my daughter my boobs eventually gained some pertness but then i had my son and they were shot i hated them and i felt i had not been given my rights as a woman boobs! i couldnt find tops i liked to fit right and i would walk out of shops crying when i tried to find a bra that fit because ther wasnt one. i refused to take my top off infront of my boyfriend although he was loving and hated the thought of him going near what was more like droopy skin than boobs. my confidence was knocked. i went for a consultation and then a meeting with the woman who was going to do my surgery she asked why i wanted them and i told her i also told her i did not care if they were only a B cup as long as i had some boobs. she said that she would try a few sizes in and see what fit best as she didnt want them to seem to fake. i had the surgery and was given a strap to strap them down for two weeks to give them a more real shape. i hardly felt any pain and had my 6mnth old son to look after, it hurt abit him on my chest alot and you are suposed to have 2wks rest but i was not able to. the only thing i could not do was put my son in and out of his cot so i would put him in bed if no one else was around. my boobs are now a very nice small D CUP sometimes i buy a 34C but i love them everyday and i am so happy with my body now and even if they loose some shape later in life well who doesnt that happen to at least they will fit a bra. the lady put my inplants under the muscle and with time i cant even feel them in there now they feel very real and the scars are unoticable about a cm or 2 underneath.i would never have been happy and confident without having the surgery in the long run this would have placed great strain on our relationship which is a very good one. my boyfriend also did not see the need but now he understands and loves them too haha. what are your boyfriends concerns for you having the surgery? maybe what i have said might put his mind at rest.

cavegirl123 · 29/11/2011 21:29

please excuse my puntuation its rubbish ha

ouryve · 29/11/2011 21:57

My boobs rest nicely on my belly, these days, but I'm not willing to put myself through major surgery to make them pert. Bodies change over time. My identity doesn't depend on which way my nipples point.

I'm assuming you can afford the payments for your tit lift (because it needs more than just a couple of implants) and that your family won't have to go without other things to pay for them. If that's the case, they're your boobs, but I do think you should listen to your DH. He likes them as they are and it's not like you're going to be walking the streets topless with them on display.

Jenny70 · 29/11/2011 21:59

Maybe cross that bridge when you get to it. When you have young kids scheduling a haircut seems to take military precision, let alone surgery and recovery.

However, I do think you need to take consideration of your partner as well, even though they are your boobs. It's a major surgery, which carries risks of complications, even death. Plus even if surgery is straightforward there is a recovery time and that is probably going to need his support. And the cost of the operation is a family consideration.

If my husband decided to get pec-implants or calf muscle inserts for significant amounts of money... I'd be talking him out of it.

But don't stress now, wait and see how you feel at that time.

troisgarcons · 29/11/2011 22:00

I'm soooo glad I didnt BF

StewieGriffinsMom · 29/11/2011 22:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Alibabaandthe80nappies · 29/11/2011 22:03

trois - it isn't the BFing that affects things, it is the pregnancies.

I would put my children's health and well being way ahead of my own vanity anyway.

troisgarcons · 29/11/2011 22:07

I know - I had a nice B cup .... now they are G's ... not saggy though - just too much of them and they keep growing ... and my eldest is 11yo. rest of me hasnt grown - these are just like some form of triffid things that keep on and on and on ....

Alibabaandthe80nappies · 29/11/2011 22:14

My Mum's are like that, they are just going on getting bigger and bigger. The rest of her has shrunk in the last 5 years or so, but not her boobs Grin

cavegirl123 · 29/11/2011 22:57

i do agree you should see how you feel when the time come and im sure you would not see your children go without i bet your so proud you have a loving partner who loves you the way you are but i understand this is not how you feel about yourself i hope you feel better about yourself with time but i just wanted to share my experience with you however i also know some dont go the right way. i am so happy for people who feel confident in their skin without feeling the need to change anything that must be such a good feeling but not all of us feel that way for lots of different reasons a happy me means my family and children are happy my mum was miserable for ever feeling guilty if she ever bought her self something so she never did and we never heard the last of it. we wouldnt have gone without if she did and i would much rather my loved ones not hide their unhappiness from me and actually be really happy.

sillymillyb · 29/11/2011 23:27

this is slightly off topic - but I have always had huuuugge boobs (32 F) and am now 24 weeks pregnant but they have only gone up to a G..... for those of you that say pregnancy not breastfeeding changes your boobs, am I in the clear now or is the 3rd trimester when they are going to get even bigger? The buggers are already round my waist, if they hit my knees Im deffo signing up for surgery puts lottery on and crosses fingers

runningwilde · 29/11/2011 23:52

Oh how great for you troisgarcons Hmm
I'm soooo glad I DID BF as it gave my child breastmilk and all the benefits that come with it. God I'm glad I don't think like you as not only are you under the misconception that bf is the thing that affects your boobs, but you obviously don't care about the benefits of bf for a baby.

samwellsbutt · 30/11/2011 00:10

oh oh bf martyrs alert! duck and covers and backs away from the thread.

runningwilde · 30/11/2011 00:16

Har Har
Yep back off or I'll squirt you with breatmilk

runningwilde · 30/11/2011 00:17

Har Har
Yep back off or I'll squirt you with breastmilk

cavegirl123 · 30/11/2011 14:38

i breast fed with both of mine for as long as i could handle it i would have kept going a bit longer if i hadnt been soaked through constantly making me uncomfortable and sore wether i breast fed or not my breasts leeked constantly it was a nightmare trying to go out, i had enough milk to feed 10 babies not one haha. breast pads were a waste of time they were wet the almost as soon as i put them on so it was torn up sheets haha. but i do know that it was not the breast feeding that made my boobs droopy flaps of skin it was the fact the grew enormously and then shrunk :0(

Original poster
LauraDudleyHulme · 02/12/2011 23:16

Only just managed to get back on but I suppose I've got a lot to think about now! Thanks for all your comments, and cavegirl thanks for understanding! I wouldn't be doing anything about it just yet obviously, but its just something I've really been thinking about a lot lately. thanks again everyone :) xx

OP posts:
tinkertitonk · 03/12/2011 00:57

Go for it. Or not. If you had a scar somewhere you wouldn't torture yourself with should I/shouldn't I, so don't feel pressured or guilty over your boobs.

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