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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My friend thinks I am!

40 replies

Fuzzled · 13/10/2011 09:29

I honestly don't think this is weird, but my friend was a bit Shock at this, and I can't see why?!

DS gets up between 6am - 7am (if you discount the night wakings!), he plays for a bit, has breakfast, waves goodbye to Dad and then he and I play/tidy/tickle etc.

He then gives his nap indications anytime between 9am and 10am, which is usually dictated by how well he's slept and when he woke.

Other than required nappy changes, I don't get him out of his PJ's, so that when he has his nap he goes back in his Grobag and I feel he is comfier than if he was up and dressed. At the end of the nap, he gets up, washed and dressed and we have the rest of the day to do things. He only has one nap per day, but usually sleeps for about 2 hours, which means I can do my job as I'm a WAHM.

Obviously, if we have something to do in the morning, I dress him when he wakes and we do whatever is required.

My friend popped round with some stuff on her way to work after dropping her DS off at nursery, came in, saw DS in his PJ's and asked why he wasn't dressed and was he ill? I of course said no and explained as above.
She was a bit Shock Hmm and said that she always dressed her DS first thing so that he would "know" that that's what people do in the morning.

Now, I could see her point if DS was older, but he's only just 1 so I don't think he'll come to harm (probably!) and as he grows, his routine will change and adapt; but she was so adamant that I was wrong that I'm now feeling a bit wobbly about my choices IYSWIM.

Tell me, oh wise Mumsnetters, am I "eccentric"? Should DS be dressed first thing? Or, as I suspect, is this fine and I should stop stressing?!

OP posts:
LaurieFairyCake · 13/10/2011 09:31

It's clearly fine. Your friend is happy to do it her way - learn to be happy to do it yours.

squeakytoy · 13/10/2011 09:33

I dont even dress MYSELF until lunch time if I am not going out most days... what is the point in getting clean clothes dirty... YANBU

TheTenantOfWildfellHall · 13/10/2011 09:33

I often used to do the same with mine at the same age. If I did get them dressed it was only into a clean babygrow unless we were going out. There's no need for babies to be dressed in cumbersome clothes when they're so small.

I know some people think it's necessary to teach them that that's what people do in the morning, but there's plenty of time for that mine seem to have managed to understand that quite well despite my comfy ways.

Yours sounds like a perfect morning to me!

Annpan88 · 13/10/2011 09:33

No I think your fine but my routines fairly similar. Are mornings are of a slower pace (I work in the evenings). Each to their own I say.

YANBU

chinam · 13/10/2011 09:33

YANBU If I could let my two live in their PJ's I would.

Pagwatch · 13/10/2011 09:33

If he is 13 your friend is right.

Otherwise she isn't .

Eglu · 13/10/2011 09:34

It seems perfectly sensible what you are doing.

Annpan88 · 13/10/2011 09:35

*our not are

SummerRain · 13/10/2011 09:35

ds2 is rarely dressed until fairly late in the morning/early afternoon either

It's perfectly fine.... if you were bringing him to the shops in his PJs I could understand her reaction but otherwise not.

minimisschief · 13/10/2011 09:36

if we arent going anywhere or having anyone around i am happy to leave my son in his. Not sure why it is an issue they are both made of fabric lol

DeWe · 13/10/2011 09:37

Must be her pfb!
Ds3 was usually eating his breakfast in his pyjamas in the buggy as I took dd2 to school. He didn't care.

Blueberties · 13/10/2011 09:38

Sounds lovely. Reminds me of small baby mornings.

TandB · 13/10/2011 09:40

I don't see the problem. DS is a bit unpredictable regarding his nap - he still has a long (up to 3 hour) nap at some point during the day. It is usually around 11, but he can be tired as early as 9.30 or not nap until about 3. At the weekend he tends to potter around in his pjs until we go out, but if he wants an early nap I will put him back down, still in his pjs, which means he won't get dressed till around lunchtime.

When we were both off sick at the same time he spent the whole day in his pjs.

No point dressing him until he needs to be dressed.

NinkyNonker · 13/10/2011 09:41

I do the same, DD (14 months) stays in her PJs until after morning nap...makes sense. Saves getting breakfast down the day's clothes as well!

thesurgeonsmate · 13/10/2011 09:41

SIBU. On such a nebulous issue, I think it's fine to say, "oh, I've always felt I had to dress the baby because..." It's a bit off to be adamant that the other person is wrong! It's lovely to hear about the different routines that evolve with the different babies - yours sounds like a great one, with the baby napping while you've still got the energy to do something with the time.

mumeeee · 13/10/2011 09:42

What you are doing is fine. I even used to put DD3 out in her pushchair still in her pyjamas to take the oldest to school.

gemdrop84 · 13/10/2011 09:42

As the last poster said its fine!! Everyone's got different ways of doing things. I have done exactly the same as you with dd in the past. I didnt dress her straight away as she was happy to play and eat breakfast etc in her pj's. She's nearly 3 now and she knows she has to get dressed in morning, it certainly hasnt done any harm so far! Smile

Hullygully · 13/10/2011 09:44

He should be in a suit and tie with shined shoes every morning. Then take him on the 7.50 am commuter train to get him used to the coming years of slavery for The Man.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 13/10/2011 09:45

there's nothing wrong with what you're doing - it's most sensible, and I used to do it with my two. Your friend is mad getting so wound up about a tiny unnecessary detail like that. So you and she do things differently - so what? What works for your routine might not work for hers and vice versa. I'm surprised she even commented, does she comment on much other stuff?

TheLadyEvenstar · 13/10/2011 09:48

DS2 and I are sitting here right now in pj's. We will shower about 10.30 and get ready for School.

Original poster
Fuzzled · 13/10/2011 09:51

PMSL Hully!

Glad to see I'm not alone and in no danger of DS becoming a weird PJ wearing adult!

Think she is getting a bit stressed with the whole nursery/work thing and as such maybe came off a bit PFB which she usually isn't.

I am very lucky that DS and I get to spend so much time together, and he is usually a goodnatured PJ dressed tot Grin

OP posts:
TipOfTheSlung · 13/10/2011 09:51

YANBU - said with 2 year old ds sat behind me in pjs

Booooooyhoo · 13/10/2011 09:53

my ds is 2.5

3 days out of 5 (weekdays) he wakes up around 7.30, has breakfast, plays, puts a dressing gown and slippers on (sometimes opts for the sock look Hmm), then a coat and we take his older brother to school. then we come home, he has a play, a bit of fruit and goes up for a nap around 10. he wakes around 11.30 and i get him washed and dressed.

i'll be quite honest here and say i dont give a flying one whether anyone thinks i'm setting him a bad example. if i dont need to go anywhere i'll happy slob about in my jammies all day. i really dont care if it's 4pm. he is comfy and happy. he looooves his dressing gown Grin and he is one of the messiest children i know so jammies are perfect until we need to go anywhere.

Booooooyhoo · 13/10/2011 09:58

i should add that the other 2 weekdays he goes to nursery and he has no problem understanding that we get dressed for nursery (still without shoes sometimes-like today Grin)

notcitrus · 13/10/2011 10:03

YANBU. My ds (3) prefers sleeping in his clothes, which at least avoids this problem! (Child happily brushes teeth and gets into bed at bedtime... I'm really not going to argue much...)