to think the school should not do this

[yippeekaiyay]

Ds's school persistenly ignore my dp.

He is ds's stepdad so to speak, although we are not married.

He was waiting outside today for 20 minutes, and after all the other children had gone he waited some more and then went to ask where ds was.....apparently he was in after school club because 'his mum wasn't there to collect him'

I mean wtf, we have introduced dp as step dad etc, but they will only acknowledge myself and ds's real dad

Well, you can nominate him as the third contact.

What is your schools stance on childminders collecting children?

I would have thought there is a fair percentage of children now living in step families.

Unless of course, your Ex has specifically asked that your new P isn't given any 'rights'?

Have you specifically told the school that it is ok for your DP to collect your DS? If so then YANBU to find this annoying.

Ex wouldn't have done that. He and dp get along well and he appreciates that DP does the bulk of parenting (he only see's ds once a week) Plus, I don't actually think he has ever had a conversation with the school since ds started

Is this the first time that your partner has collected your son?

Does the teacher only "release" a child if she sees the parent outside?

If you've specified that DP is to collect your DS according to the school's preferred procedure then you've every right to be spitting mad at them.

I'd write to the head and tell him/her that Paul Smith, whom I had originally introduced to class teacher Mrs Jones on 1st March this year, is authorised to collect Johhny and always had been, that I was concerned that he was not permitted to, causing Johnny confusion and Paul Smith embarassment, humiliation and inconvenience and that I trust that this will not happen again, adding that should the school have any issues about releasing Johnny to Paul Smith they contact me in writing with full details of their reasons.

DP has been taking ds to school and collecting him for the entire term so far, and also for a lot of last year

his reception teacher didn't ignore dp, its his new yr1 teacher, despite the fact we introduced DP as his step dad.

Good idea Vallhala - I dont like his new teacher AT ALL.

Have you actually informed the school in writing that your DP has permission to pick up your son, and has this permission been counter signed by his father?

If not I would do so as the school are following procedure by not allowing your DP to pick your DS up.