"Why no DH, you certainly did not!
While you fell asleep on the couch (despite me requesting a nap as it's that time of the month) I did try to change the channel to something that I wanted to see; but I do appreciate that you were listening to it and just resting your eyes and this therefore leads me to conclude that it must have been the fact that you were concentrating so hard on your programme which meant you did not go an comfort our DS and resettle him when he banged his head on his cot bars mid nap."
"What's the smell? Oh nothing much, just our tea simmering down - oh, and I made a separate pot for DS so that, while he's eaten the same thing, there are a couple of more baby friendly ingredients."
"What's the noise? Just the dishwasher and washing machine doing a load. Oh, and the other smell might be the washing hanging up drying as it's raining outside."
"But no, nothing much has happened and you didn't miss anything."
ARGH!!!!!!!!