to consider faking illness as an excuse...

[Nixea]

...for the house resembling a biohazard zone, the chicken for dinner still sitting contently in the freezer and The Child being covered quite literally from head to foot in a glorious mud/sand mixture and the DH arriving home any minute? Oh...and for the bottle of wine already being open!

Maybe something something suitably serious like plague might be a good excuse.

You could tell him a tiger came for tea.

You've had a off day. Get a takeaway or something quick. Don't make an excuse.

Get a takeaway I would

HIde the bottle and go outside and roll in the mud too - then suggest take-away / beans on toast for tea

stuff child and dirt in a cupboard and announce to your dh that you think he deserves a treat and should choose his favourite takeaway.

I have to confess that rolling in the mud does look like fun...although maybe that's the glass of wine talking!

Thanks all - you've justified a crisis call to the nearest Chinese! Love the idea of selling it to him as a treat for him too

Yes, you are so concerned to give him a treat, you've already opened the wine ready for his return...

Bloomin brilliant Curry! That's how thoughtful I am

Thanks!

Selfless you are Nixea. Selfless

such a thoughtful person you are!