Well, that's how the silly mare assistant on the customer service counter acted today, anyway!
I needed a new swimsuit, my ancient one having bitten the dust, and, being wobbly of tum, wanted one with controlly bits and I recalled that M&S did them. I haven't bought clothes in M&S in yonks, and when I picked up my 'usual' size I saw it looked mahoosive. I did a quick scan of other clothing items and saw that they all seemed a bit on the large size for what they were, however M&S seem to have stopped doing that useful thing they used to do in the label where it would say 'chest ##ins' or whatever, so I had nothing to go on.
There was a queue a mile long for the changing rooms and as I wanted the swimsuit to take DD swimming that afternoon I needed to know I was buying the right size as if I got it home and it didn't fit, there was no time to take it back. There was no queue at the customer service desk, so I thought I'd ask what measurements their sizes actually were, and I could then judge what size I'd need to buy.
Silly me.
First of all, I asked her what chest size their size 14 was. "We don't do swimsuits by chest size". Okay, fair enough, what size hips/waist was it for?
"If you're a dress size 14, a size 14 swimsuit will fit you."
Yes, but I'm not sure that I am a size 14 in your shop, because they look massive.
"Our size 14s are size 14"
Erm... that makes no sense whatsoever.
"It's a size 14. If you're size 14 elsewhere, then this will fit you."
No, actually, that doesn't hold true, because I'm a size 12 in Sainsbo's, a size 14 in Next, a size 16 in Top Shop and Warehouse and a 12 again in Boden. So what is the chest measurement of an M&S size 14?
Eye rolling. "It's a standard size 14."
Please could you just tell me what the measurements are?
"If you're a 14, this will fit you."
Please. Tell. Me. The. Chest. Measurement. Of. A. Size. 14.
Grudgingly and avoiding eye contact "36in chest"
I'm a 36FF, so theoretically that should fit me, if somewhat snugly. I look at it, it still seems massive, so I take a chance and buy the 12, get it home and it fits perfectly. No way was that 14 swimsuit a 36" chest.
But why all the bloody evasiveness? She didn't have to look it up, so it was obviously information that she knew, so why on earth wouldn't she just tell me?
Madness....