to febreeze a cat?

[Nagoo]

Mine stinks of fags. I'm not letting him upstairs to loll his stinking self on my bed, so he's annoying me by talking at me.

If I chuck him out he'll go back behind the bikesheds or wherever he's been..

Any strategies for getting out cat stink? or stopping the cat from going down the bingo or wherever it is he's been?

cat and dog wipes?

Why does your cat stink of fags? Is he a secret smoker?

How come he reeks of fags?

Just came home like it?

Take his allowance away so he can't buy any more cigs !

Could he join a club? Evening classes? Find a better sort of cat to hang out with?

Have you checked his Facebook?

give him a bath, not the most fun thing to do but it is manageable. Only use pet products on animals anything else can poison them.

YANBU, Febreeze him. I febreeze DH all the time.

Fickle little beast has been 'living it up' at someone elses' house.

Cats are such tarts!

Wilkinsons sell a spray for animals - kind of like cat deodorant. I wouldn't febreeze your cat as you will irritate his skin.(I think you are joking, but just in case)

If you do bath your cat, don't attempt to dry him with the hair dryer. I did this to ours and it didn't go well! (In my defence, I was a child at the time, and thought the cat would like it. I wasn't being mean).

I've stopped his allowance months ago. He cadges them of his friends.

His brother is such a good boy

I'm going to investigate the cat deodorant option. I'm actually highly amused but not foolhardy enough to attempt to bath him

what about a bit of tee tree diluted in a spray?

1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.

2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water and have both lids lifted. 3. Obtain the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom. 4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (you may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape). CAUTION: Do not get any part of your body too close to the edge, as his paws will be reaching out for anything they can find. The cat will self-agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from your toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this. 5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power wash and rinse" which I found to be quite effective. 6. Have someone open the door to the outside and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door. 7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can and quickly lift both lids. 8. The now-clean cat will rocket out of the toilet and run outside where he will dry himself.

Sincerely,
The Dog

slightlymad72 sounds like a foolproof technique.

He'll move into the smoke den permanently after that with any luck

If the above method fails then the one below can be used.

Cat Bathing As A Martial Art

1. Know that although the kitty cat has the advantage of quickness and lack of concern for human life, you have the advantage of strength. Capitalize on that advantage by selecting the battlefield. Don't try to bathe him in an open area where he can force you to chase him. Pick a very small bathroom. If your bathroom is more than four feet square, we recommend that you get in the tub with the cat and close the sliding-glass doors as if you were about to take a shower. (A simple shower curtain will not do. A berserk cat can shred a three-ply rubber shower curtain quicker than a politician can shift positions.)

2. Know that a cat has claws and will not hesitate to remove all the skin from your body. Your advantage here is that you are smart and know how to dress to protect yourself. We recommend canvas overalls tucked into high-top construction boots, a pair of steel-mesh gloves, an army helmet, a hockey face-mask, and a long-sleeved flak jacket.

3. Use the element of surprise. Pick up your cat nonchalantly, as if to simply carry him to his supper dish. (Cats will not usually notice your strange attire. They have little or no interest in fashion as a rule.)

4. Once you are inside the bathroom, speed is essential to survival. In a single liquid motion, shut the bathroom door, step into the tub enclosure, slide the glass door shut, dip the cat in the water and squirt him with shampoo. You have now begun one of the wildest 45 seconds of your life.

5. Cats have no handles. Add the fact that he now has soapy fur, and the problem is radically compounded. Do not expect to hold on to him for more than two or three seconds at a time. When you have him, however, you must remember to give him another squirt of shampoo and rub like crazy. He'll then spring free and fall back into the water, thereby rinsing himself off. (The national record for cats is three latherings, so don't expect too much.)

6. Next, the cat must be dried. Novice cat bathers always assume this part will be the most difficult, for humans generally are worn out at this point and the cat is just getting really determined. In fact, the drying is simple compared with what you have just been through. That's because by now the cat is semi-permanently affixed to your right leg.

7. You simply pop the drain plug with your foot, reach for your towel and wait. (Occasionally, however, the cat will end up clinging to the top of your army helmet. If this happens, the best thing you can do is to shake him loose and to encourage him toward your leg.) After all the water is drained from the tub, it is a simple matter to just reach down and dry the cat.

   In a few days the cat will relax enough to be removed from your leg. He will usually have nothing to say for about three weeks and will spend a lot of time sitting with his back to you. He might even become psychoceramic and develop the fixed stare of a plaster figurine.

   You will be tempted to assume he is angry. This isn't usually the case. As a rule he is simply plotting ways to get through your defenses and injure you for life the next time you decide to give him a bath. But at least now he smells a lot better.

Put him in the bath and wash him. I had to do that the other day when my cat fell in the pond and came out covered in mud and sludge (it hasn't been cleaned through the winter)

He actually didn't mind being in the bath but he looked like a drowned rat after - lol

If you don't think he would take to water I suggest wearing gardening gloves to do it or you will end up scratched to bits