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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to keep ignoring this friends request on FB?

20 replies

DetectivePotato · 31/08/2010 09:54

A relative of mine is on my FB. I don't really want her there but it will cause problems if I delete her.

She has now set up another profile, I don't know why and keeps requesting me as a friend. I already have her once, I don't want that. Let alone twice. She has requested me 3 times and I have ignored it. The shitty message will be along soon like it was the last time when I ignored her original request. I got a message asking me why I was being "so sad and pathetic" because I didn't want to accept the request. I accepted it to keep the peace really.

Getting kind of pissed off now. She isn't an adult either.

OP posts:

alicet · 31/08/2010 09:56

If she isn't an adult then it is easy. Just say that you are discussing adult things on your FB that you do not wish her to see.

Actually scratch that - you let a child bully you into friending her? WHY?????

TriplePachyderm · 31/08/2010 09:58

I'm with alicet

katkouta · 31/08/2010 09:59

YANBU Just dont accept it, and block her other profile. That way she can't send you any messaages.

SandStorm · 31/08/2010 09:59

Delete and block her.

ben5 · 31/08/2010 10:00

tell her that when she is 16 you will become friends with her!

ForzaDelDestino · 31/08/2010 10:01

you can customise to hide all your posts made from this person

don't accept to keep the peace

Original poster

DetectivePotato · 31/08/2010 10:03

I have thought of that, and I want to do it. She is my (half) sister though and the fact that I freely have and want my other (half) brothers and sister on my profile will piss her off. They are adults though.

There is a slight back story where she was talking to me on there and being her bratty spoilt self (she was 12, 13 now) and I pulled her up on it. Now I am the horrible and nasty one and relationships with her and her mum have become fragile because of it. It is really OTT and totally ridiculous which is why I want to delete her in the first place. I also don't agree with a lot of the stuff on her page, groups that she joins that are all about sex and stuff, photos of her lifting up her dress to flash her underwear in the sea, sitting on the toilet. I hope no one dodgy hacks into her account.

OP posts:

GooseyLoosey · 31/08/2010 10:05

Isn't she too young to properly be on face book anyway? Couldn't you use this as an excuse?

Original poster

DetectivePotato · 31/08/2010 10:09

She was too young. Now she is 13 which is the age you are 'allowed' to join. Like that stopped her before anyway. Not an excuse anymore.

I could say I don't want children on there but I'm pretty sure my dad (who is also on my FB) will know thats not the reason and he will know its just her. I know she is young etc but I just can't stand the way she talks to people and no one else is prepared to say anything, so when I do, I am the bad guy. I was brought up by GPs and manners were very important. I wouldn't have dreamt of speaking to adults the way that she does, no way would I have been allowed to get away with it.

Sorry, turned into a bit of a rant there.

OP posts:

Katisha · 31/08/2010 10:12

A bit extreme, but how badly do you want FB? I deregistered a while back and didn't miss it. The catalyst for me was a teenage relative actually.

It really is a can of worms, Facebook.

SolidGoldBrass · 31/08/2010 10:14

Just ignore and block. You don't have to answer to her or anyone else.

TotalChaos · 31/08/2010 10:16

yanbu. agree with SGB. refuse to be stropped/guilted into adding her.

LucyLouLou · 31/08/2010 10:17

I'd keep the peace here tbh. Accept the request but put her on a limited profile (or whatever it's called) and hide her posts from your news feed. It's probably the only way you can keep everyone happy and I'm not sure making an issue out of Facebook is going to do anyone any favours here.

foxytocin · 31/08/2010 10:18

erm how do you block your posts from someone?

Original poster

DetectivePotato · 31/08/2010 10:21

I have thought about deleting my profile as I am fed up of it and I have deleted nearly 100 people recently as I didn't talk to them on there, which is my new rule.

I keep it as its easy to arrange group events with my friends and I keep in touch with my sister in the Navy, brother in the Army and other brother who is miles at uni.

I should just apply my rule really. I don't talk to her, therefore she should be deleted which I have done to loads of other people.

OP posts:

teaandcakeplease · 31/08/2010 10:21

Go to Account, then Privacy settings, then at the bottom is "customize settings" then in "posts by me" click to the right on the drop down menu and choose "custom edit" and then choose who to hide your status updates etc from.

Tbh though if they say you're sad and pathetic they're not a very nice relative as others have said. You don't have to answer to her or anyone else. Block and ignore.

ForzaDelDestino · 31/08/2010 10:21

go to account, then click on privacy then colick on customise and type in the person's name

Minxie1977 · 31/08/2010 10:22

Agree with SGB. If she goes on about it just explain she's too young to understand witha big patronising frwon on your face!

teaandcakeplease · 31/08/2010 10:26

If you do choose to accept her, the next time something appears on newsfeed about her, to the right is a tiny blue X, click on it and then select "hide" then voila! no more of her status updates appear in your newsfeed. So unless you click onto her actual profile page you'll have no idea what's going on

foxytocin · 31/08/2010 10:51

thanks for the info.

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