Struggle to not binge drink on nights out but otherwise fine, sick of myself.

[HeyManLookAtMeRockingOut]

I’ve realised this week I need to stop drinking, I’m not sure what to call my problem and not sure what I’m wanting from posting here.

pre-kids I used to drink a fair bit, but generally a fairly normal level. After kids I very rarely drink because it’s just not really worth it. My husband might have a drink or two on the odd night in the house and I never bother.

my problem comes when I go on a night out, maybe 4 times a year or so. When I start, I just don’t stop. I end up black out drunk after most nights out. I can only remember a handful of occasions where I haven’t ended up blackout drunk.

im just so fed up with myself. I can have a couple in other situations, if I go for a meal I can have a drink or two and head home. Once home it’s not like I have any inclination to keep going. It’s just the going out-out times that I’m an absolute embarrassment.

is anyone else in the same boat?

This sounds dangerous if you black out. How do you get home?

I think super worth going to an AA meeting. You don’t have to be an alcoholic, you could class yourself as a problem drinker. My husband has found it so supportive and helpful

4x a year? Just stop these 4 nights a year. Shouldn’t be hard! It is 4 nights of the year!

My thinking is that if I don’t completely stop, still have the odd one with a meal out etc, then it’ll get to a night out and I’ll convince myself that I can just have a few, then I’ll lose control.

I generally go out with my husband so we get home together.

im on the fence about doing nights out sober, I think I could if I was completely AF. My husband would support me if I didn’t want to at all but it is something we enjoy together sometimes so I’d like to still go out with him sometimes.

sorry for the ramble and lack of punctuation!

This is 4x a year? Come on, just stop those 4 nights a year!

both you and your husband get absolutely plastered or just you?

I was similar. I never drink, even at home or with meals, it’s not my thing since kids.

but I’d have works night out or a girls night out once or twice a year and I’d get carried away with the excitment of being out and having fun. Everyone would encourage me to drink more. I’d be absolutely drunk but the next day I’d have fits. It was horrific. I was tripping, and I couldn’t control my body.

And now it’s scared me into never drinking, always going to nights out by car so I have zero choice in the matter and no one would encourage me otherwise. And it’s great, I go home at a decent hour and feel refreshed in the morning.

The black outs need to scare you. Because that’s awful. And like the fits I was having, it only takes one to cause an almighty havoc on your life and put you in danger. Your body can’t do these binges.
Next night out, no drinks. It’s actually quite empowering to be able to say no.

How on earth do you manage to parent the next day?

One way of looking at it is that your kids will begin to be much more aware of what’s going on. And who wants to see their mum being carried in by their drunk dad, mum passed out, probably got sick on herself, maybe wet herself, and then the next day can’t move for the hangover? No one

This was why I stopped drinking, had a scary blackout after what was supposed to be a mums night out. I noticed this was starting to be part of a pattern,where certain nights out I really let loose which left to extreme binge drinking.
Do you think it's worth examining why you do this ?
For me, I think I associated drinking with my fun carefree uni days and in my early 20s. I have loads of responsibilities and was chasing that fun feeling. I was also dealing with grief and it spiralled quickly.
It's worth trying sobriety and seeing how you feel. For me, the biggest bonus is knowing I won't get blackout drunk and hangovers are a thing of the past .

Exactly the same here, just feel there is no handbrake, feels great at time but does lead to situatikns at times. My DP doesnt like it much either