Really scared it’s too late

[Hawaiiinthemorning]

I’m drink far too much, bottle and a half about 5 days a week. I’m overweight, feel knackered, high blood pressure and cholesterol plus I’ve started getting psoriasis.
I’m scared I’ve damaged my liver, I had a scan summer 2020 and it shown fatty liver.
My diet is appalling too and I’m terrified I’ll die and my daughter will grow up without me.
I really need to sort myself out but the longest I go with out wine is about 4 days.

I’ve had 3 alcohol free days now, had a full nights sleep and feel ok but have awful nightmares about losing my dd, something I have huge worries about.
Feel a bit more relaxed and not convinced my bp is truly that bad, I’ve ordered a bp monitor and some beetroot powder which should be here by weekend.
Weekend will be a challenge in terms of not drinking.

I'm going to share my story op if you don't mind .3 and a half years ago a seriously toxic relationship ended when my then partner drove through a wall pissed in a last ditch bid to keep me. It failed but the sight of them that night led me down a wrong path after several years of emotional financial and physical abuse first it was 2 bottles a day but soon that wasn't enough at the worst it was 4 sometimes 5 bottle of wine a day. I was never sober I placed my youngest 2 in temporary care as even though I still made sure the house was clean they had clean uniform were well fed I was a fucking mess and I'm ashamed to say they were better off without me then .I was so poorly my blood sugars were dropping to dangerous levels I moved back to my hometown.my ex wanted my in a tiny rural village away from anyone who cared so noone would notice exactly what was happening I managed to find a house pack and move within 3 days without telling a soul except social services. I did not and have not touch one bottle of wine since the day I left .I made our new house beautiful decorated every room got myself a job and made a stable environment for my children to come home to I do drink but very very rarely and no more than a few lagers or wkds. My kids trust me again and know their mum is back but it could have gone so much more wrong . You can do this op I'm always about if you want to message xxx

You've taken the first step, been to the GP and you've already done 3 days without a drink that's amazing. You're making the change. Keep going.

So managed to not drink for 4 days and then drank for 3 days over the weekend. Toward is day 3 of not drinking again.
Blood results back and my gamma gt result is higher than it should be.

@Hawaiiinthemorning did you plan to drink for those 3 days over the weekend? If not, what was the trigger for the first of those drinks?