"YES it is SO worth it, YES it gets easier and YES we thought it was impossible as well - its not 😊" A thread for those embracing an alcohol free existence.

[Drybird2020]

Thanks to @Ravenswick for the quote in the title 😊. We are back for thread 5, and if you are just joining us, or thinking about it, you might want to have a read through its predecessors, which are full of useful tips, sound advice, stories and cautionary tales. You will absolutely, definitely find much that resonates, and talking regularly on here is a great way to stay sane and keep yourself accountable.

Thread 1
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/alcohol_support/3781133-Anyone-else-stopping-completely-in-2020

Thread 2
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/alcohol_support/3810419-Still-stopped-in-2020-a-thread-for-anyone-abstaining-from-alcohol

Thread 3 www.mumsnet.com/Talk/alcohol_support/3910349-Staying-Stopped-Alcohol-Free-permanently

Thread 4
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/alcohol_support/3965594-Forever-Free-a-life-without-booze-2020-onwards

The only "rules" are that you are committing to an alcohol free life, and that you have stopped drinking before you begin to post.

If you've been here for a while, you know what to do. Keep doing it! 😊

Unfortunately I am on Day 3 again, having had two glasses of wine on my birthday at the weekend. I’m not beating myself up too much because I’ve not drunk since and I didn’t drink to excess.

However, it really wasn’t worth it:

• I slept terribly
• Pain in my liver has returned
• Now getting the Shall I drink voice every evening, when it had gone 🙄!
• Started to feel a bit more anxious again.

Anyway, I’ve brought a bottle of non alcoholic mulled punch in from the garage to crack open tonight - onwards and upwards. I’ve also started C25K today (the Zombies Run version).

Well done Furble on staying dry.

@Horlicks4me - do you want to drink on Christmas Day? If you don't want to you can always have something non-alcoholic in a grown-up glass and raise your glass with your dh. It's hard. My dh drinks and I know he'd love for me to drink with him over Christmas. I don't want to have to stop again though so I'm going to hold out. Well that's the plan. It's not him who had over a stone of lockdown wine weight to lose, or who was getting broken sleep after all.

All good here with plenty of nice alcohol free drinks in for Christmas and New Year. Final shopping trip to Lidl later tonight. I think I'm day 45 today. Definitely my longest stretch ever.

@Blackberryblossom. Yes I would love to drink on Christmas Day as I would love to be a social drinker (strictly speaking I shouldn't be saying that on this thread) and not turn back into a bottle of wine every night person again. This is my 1st attempt at giving up and my voice is saying gooooo on and give it a go/you can do it. However, I have read a lot of comments on here from people who have done that and regretted it. I know it's my decision alone and my DH will be support me. Alas ........

Just updating to say that the Belvoir mulled non-alcoholic punch is lovely - not too realistic but likewise not too cough syrupy.

Evening all! Still going strong after my wobble a few days ago, thank you again for your encouragement and support. Drinking wouldn’t have fixed anything and instead I’m on day 109 and definitely the most prepared for Xmas I’ve ever been! It’s amazing what we can do with all the extra time we save when not drinking or hungover.

Today I’ve reclaimed the wine glass (!) and been enjoying half pineapple juice and half ginger beer with lots of ice, it’s delicious!

I’ve also got some of that Belvoir punch in to try tomorrow night!

We’ve had a lovely day here, first day off work, have cleaned the house and done biscuits with the kids and am currently baking my ham, happy days!

It’s going to be so weird starting the new year feeling actually rested and well rather than fat and pickled and regretful!

Happy birthday @Wildernesstips, hope you had a lovely day! Thank you for sharing how you’re feeling , it’s really helpful to hear, particularly now when I’m sure plenty of us are looking at cold wine and wavering a bit. I appreciate it!!

Sorry to ask that question and run, I got an offer of a few hours babysitting and didn't need to be asked twice. I am much more organised now. I actually bought that klogg or whatever it's called in Ikea this evening and it's nice, warmed up it's tasty.

Well done all and @Wildernesstips two glasses of wine on your birthday does not a good plan ruin, you're still on a winning streak drinking that tiny amount so keep going.

I'm day 52. Offered Christmas day lift to my mother home at end of the day as an insurance, not that I really need it I don't actually feel like drinking. (I should add I am not in the UK by the way, so having my mother is ok as we are a bubble).

Well done everyone anyway. I must try find the belvoir stuff although i already have an M&S non-alcoholic mulled wine here, I've a vague memory of having it when pregnant and no one else would drink it!

Hello all, Christmas Eve here in Aus. I’m so sorry to hear the Christmas lockdown news from home - it’s so shit, you’re all doing so well.
I’m at my in-laws and I won’t lie it’d be much easier (for everyone) if I was drinking. DH and them have had a very dysfunctional relationship, emotionally distant b ut suffocating then when we had kids, a lot of boundaries were crossed and they wanted to live with us when we emigrated here, because we said no I’ve been blamed for ruining their retirement plans - everyone’s very uptight around each other but these cracks are painted over when we all have a drink and we can loosen up. Because I’m not doing that this year, I’m letting the side down is the vibe I’m getting ‘you’re STILL vegetarian and now you’re not drinking - oh you do like to go on your fads and make it difficult for us, I’ll give you a glass anyway I know you like your wine ha ha ha’. I’ve been vegetarian for 5 years and I’m making most of the dinner!
So, in a petty way, the reason I’m not drinking for the next few days is I don’t want to give them the satisfaction adding pettiness to my toolbox

Hey all, I’m a bit behind on the thread but just wanted to say I’m thinking of you all!!! Whether you are finding it easy or hard, you are doing bloody great because you are still here👏👏👏

I’m off on a crisp country side walk, I would normally bring a hip flask but today I’m bringing a fancy new mug to be filled with fancy coffee from my fancy machine!!!

Hang in there team x

Excellent Eileen - any fuel for the fire will do!

Auto correct there I meant Dileen.

Enjoy the walks BBB, sounds idyllic!

Hi everyone
I'm a bit behind too. Going to sit down after Christmas and read it through with a cuppa and catch up on new folks and news.

I had such a revelation last night. Sitting watching a movie and my dh was struggling to stay awake, mostly because he is having a bit more Christmas Cheer than he'd normally have. All good, he doesn't have an issue with drinking and it doesn't bother me that he is. But, I realised that I LOVED the fact that I didn't feel groggy and I really enjoyed the whole film.

I had been focusing on how good it is to not wake up the next day feeling good but I realised how great it was to go to bed clear headed. I heard him get up in the night for a drink of water - no dry mouth through the night for me. I think for me, it's easy to focus on how good it makes me feel not to have a hangover, but am probably still feel I'm 'missing out' on the fun bit the night before. But so much of it wasn't fun!! In fact much more of it wasn't fun than was. It's like a lightbulb has gone off in my head. I realised how much I enjoy my evenings now. I enjoy an AF gin and tonic or coke or ginger beer but don't feel the need to drink it on and on and on.

And even though I am enjoying some Christmas treats, I am not stuffing myself full of salty snacks all night to soak up the wine.

So, instead of feeling like I am missing out on anything this Christmas, i feel quite the opposite, I am more present. More present to watch a whole film without nodding off, more present with the people around me, more present with myself. I'm not away in my own foggy head then having to go to bed because I'm pissed.

Happy AF Christmas eve everyone. I might not get on here tomorrow so I wanted to say a huge thank you to you for being here. Not sure I would be at 4 and a half months dry without this thread. It certainly wouldn't have been as much fun on my own and you've helped me through some difficult times this last few months.

Thanks Breathmillar, that's a great post to read and I really agree.

Can I also just say it - this is a stressful enough time of year without worrying that you can't post here without feeling the need to acknowledge all posts, and I hope people just post what they feel like as I really love all the contributions like yours breathmillar cos it is really relatable right now.

I personally love all the posts but find it hard be it on a phone or whatever to get back to everyone.

I’ve taken a screenshot of the toolbox, thanks for the summary so it’s all in one place.

I’ve arrived home from work to find DH has bought a bottle of fizz ‘in case we want to make Buck’s Fizz in the morning’ because that’s our usual Christmas morning breakfast. He has also bought himself a case of beer and a bottle of wine, to go with the bottles in my hamper from work. I’ve finished for 5 days, I would normally be halfway down a glass of wine by now but will busy myself with a last tidy and a walk later if it gets too much of a temptation.

Tomorrow will be the first hangover free Christmas morning in many, many years. Wish I’d thought to make the effort when I had DC waking us up at 5 am instead of lazy teens!

Wishing you all a lovely Christmas 🎄

I haven't been on this thread for a while but I am still loving the AF life, and about to have myself the first Christmas one in decades! I've got ginger beer, Belvoir and good old fashioned Schloer but besides this I've got absolutely no inclination to drink alcohol at all.

Merry Christmas to you all and a huge congratulations for getting here. You've been a great support to me in what's coming up for a year and I wish everyone of you a brilliant time over the festive period.

Hello! I was on the threads at the beginning, and I like to pop in now and again to check up on youse

Christmas Eve and for the first time since, ooh, the late eighties, I am sober as a judge. I didn’t swig eggnog when I was making the red cabbage, I didn’t sneak in a glass of fizz when I was doing the pre Christmas clean, and now I’ve sat down in front of the fire with my feet up to watch a crappy film and enjoy the Christmas tree twinkling, I haven’t poured myself a glass of red.

And I feel great

It’s been nearly a year since I packed in the booze and honestly, what a great fucking decision it’s been. Well done me. And well done to all of you too!

ope everyone is having a lovely Christmas Eve. @Ulysses @SophocIestheFox @Breathmiller such inspiring and positive posts, thank you. I am right in the middle of my witching hour - it feels like the first ever Friday night dry - just that niggling feeling that something is missing. So I shall finish writing this then pour something nice. I can do this. I have the toolbox saved too.

Hope everyone has a lovely Christmas tomorrow!

Hope not ope.

Same to you blackberry

Brother dropped in a 'really nice red' earlier..... neighbour too with a note that she's looking forward to when she can have us over for nice evening and share a bottle again. I feel slightly weird about the future going to someone's house for drinks and asking for water or whatever. But right now I'm not seeing myself drinking as above for a year or more anyway. I suppose I'll just say medication or whatever. Why am I obsessing about this on Christmas eve I do not know but I guess I've had about 5 photos of wine glasses and cheese and twinkly lights and I'm in my bedroom folding laundry keeping busy.

Hope everyone is doing OK, or better.

I haven't wanted to drink but I've felt some nostalgia for it. The associations are so strong with so many activities at this time of year, I am having to re-learn Christmas.

@cartooner I have told people the abridged truth, which is that my hrt doesn’t work as well when I drink. In most cases, this closes the conversation straight down. In some unfortunate cases I then get asked why I am choosing to stop the alcohol rather than the hrt

ha ha @blackberryblossom good answer!

Great @Drybird2020 and as you know the nostalgia won't be there in the morning!

🎶 Simply haaaaving a horrible Christmas time. 🎶

Keep strong lads, we can do this.

Good morning all. I managed a run this morning, shattered but it felt great. I've already ran a couple of times this week but this morning I thought it would be good to do it today too as it might keep me motivated over the coming months to look back to this Christmas and remind myself of both stopping drinking, my healthier self as a result as well as just being more present. I also managed a spontaneous early morning coffee with a friend last weekend which I couldn't have done before as I would have likely been over the limit to drive or too tired and fuzzy after drinking.
I'm now at 174 days.
Hope this day is memorable for all you too, for the right reasons 😬

Hang in there @Hangingover

Wow, @100PercentMe, that’s impressive. I’m hoping for a walk after lunch. Doing ok here.