Want to connect; what's your story

[Scottysmum2008]

We started the adoption route earlier this year to extend our family.
Hope we're at the end of stage 1 heading to stage 2.
Looking for connection with people who have done this already, are going through the process, or are looking to do this too.
Interested in your story and would like to share mine; although we have friends and a network, what with working and shifts, meeting up or catching up proves difficult, so can feel lonely at times.
It's not just about adopting, it's about making friends.
This is a tricky world to navigate at the best of times

We’re at the very beginning of the process, meeting the social worker for the initial visit next week. Feeling very nervous and not sure what to expect to be honest!

You may find someone you gel with on your Stage 2 course, who may live near you. We are keeping in touch in our case.

Our SW are actually putting us in touch with another family locally to us with similar circumstances - so you could always ask for this as well.

Hi scottysmum
I am in stage 2- almost done (yay!) just waiting for my PAR to be written and for panel.
I've found it really useful chatting to other people on the same journey both online here and in real life.
Like topcat said you might find others locally via your social worker which is what I have done. I've kept in touch with all those on my training as well.
Happy to chat via pm if you'd prefer?
x

We go to panel on Monday. Has taken over a year to get here.

@2dads - we had panel a week ago today, which is almost a year to the day.

The adoption order for my son was granted in June. The whole process took us a little over two years. It isn't an easy journey but absolutely worth it. Our boy completes our little family. Good luck on your journey

It took us 6 months from starting the process to approval. It was then another 7 months until LO moved in. It should have been faster by about 6-8 weeks but introductions were delayed due to issues with the foster carer. We thought that 13 months was fast but everyone we know who has been approved in the past year has taken no more than 8/9 months from application to intros.

Introductions and the weeks after were really hard but we are all very, very happy now!

Hey, my journey was 10 months from application to my LO moving in. She is an absolute dream and I adore her. The process isn’t that bad if you just embrace it, enjoy it and keep envisioning the end goal. I found waiting for match panel the hardest ( I’m quite impatient !) I was ‘linked ‘ with a baby the day before panel so never experienced the ‘ waiting to be matched phase ‘ x

Hi @Scottysmum2008 and good luck with the process!!

Our journey has took about 7 months from the first sort of meeting with our social worker to getting through training, the assessments, panel then getting to meet our little one.

We should of been done a few weeks earlier but due to a holiday that was already booked our stage 1 and stage two training was a bit all over the place with dates.

We matched really early on too, like once we got to the assessment stage we got presented with the match. Because of that we opted to go for a more intensive assessment process to get the PAR completed sooner.

How have you found the process so far?

Hi everyone, and thank you so much for joining my conversation.
We're very close to the end of stage 1, but what with DH shifts at the moment, tying up with our SW is proving to be a little tricky. That will change in the New Yr as he changes to a day job, yay .
We've stayed on the same page with this throughout our slightly drawn out stage 1, and plan to head on into stage 2 without a break.

It's really interesting to hear how long the process has taken from start to matching/placement - given the info we received on our training we don't expect to be matched quickly and that makes sense to make sure it is as good as match as possible for everyone.
We've been doing lots of homework - does anyone have any recommendations of sources/resouces that they found to be most useful?

Nurturing attachments - Kim Golding

This was a really great read. Sounds like it is all on track for you, you do right to read and research even if only 1 or 2 parts are relevant to you.

I did loads of reading and although haven’t needed any of it I feel prepared ( my baby moved in with Forster carer from birth so had a great start )

Enjoy this exciting time - it will all be worth it x

Look into attachment disorder as much as you can. I'd ask your LA about attachment matters, which is an amazing training course about attachment too. Other than that we found looking in to theraplay techniques really beneficial. Our LO hasn't had the best start so focusing on the attachment to us 110%.

Ooo one thing we will say is read about people's experiences as much as possible. I felt totally prepared and then when my LO has a day where Dad was more appealing than Daddy it killed me, even though I had through I'd prepared for it. I took a step back with the kisses and cuddles and LO was all over us both today.

Hi! We started the process end of August , filled out a registration of interest form and had our initial meeting 5th Oct, have done the mandatory course at the start of Nov but only now we have been assigned our social worker and having our 1st meeting with her on Monday! In all it’s been about 13 weeks , our agency with the local authority are very busy , lots of children but not many adopters it seems! Currently filling in form regarding our referees etc, and the dbs checks are underway too! Realistically with Xmas & New Years I was surprised to have a meeting we could fit in around DH work but it turns out our SW is independent self employed and is more flexible working around us which is a plus! Excited to start the assessment now!

Our son has been with us over four and a half years. The process took a little over a year and a half (20 months). We also have a broth daughter who is a teenager.