Starting Out

[wouldlikeanother]

I'm exploring adoption as an option - more to see if it is an option really. I'm a single parent and my DS is 7.

On the information that I've seen it says about the checks etc that are carried out. It says about Financial checks - I work FT but have bad credit history - will that affect my application?

I'm sure there will be other queries to come!

Thanks in advance

I am not sure about that but the key thing they want to know is can you support a child.

If you adopted a preschool age child they would expect you to take a year of adoption leave, not sure if the child was older what they would expect.

Please ask anything you like, there are some single adopters on here.

They've given me a phone number to ring to discuss it with them, which hopefully will answer a lot of questions. The amount of time off work that I would need to take was one of them, so thank you for that Italiangreyhound :)

I'm really mostly curious about if single adopters have to show that they can be "as good as" two parent adopters. I'm hoping that having my own child will be a positive in this regard because obviously, I'm already doing it

Some children positively benefit from a single parent

• they can't divide and rule the parents if there is only one
• they may have a strong attachment to BM or BD and need an opposite sex carer so as not to conflict their emotions
• they may have had v bad experiences with BM or BD and be very rejecting/scared of that gender as a whole

You will need to show you have a strong 'support network' and perhaps also positive role models of the other sex.

Well that's a hole in my plan then as DS has hardly any strong male role models. There are no male teachers at school, my male friends work full time and do single men things at weekends and my brother has his own family to worry about. DS gets his MRM at sports classes and similar - that and the weekly visit to school by the Vicar!

Getting call back from Adoption Agency tomorrow so will speak to them about it.

Thank you for your post

Well that's a hole in my plan then as DS has hardly any strong male role models. There are no male teachers at school, my male friends work full time and do single men things at weekends and my brother has his own family to worry about. DS gets his MRM at sports classes and similar - that and the weekly visit to school by the Vicar!

Getting call back from Adoption Agency tomorrow so will speak to them about it.

Thank you for your post

Just to say that I've just received a phonecall back from local authority adoption agency following my enquiry.

They have said that DS (nearly 7) is a little young and that considering the affect that it may have on him to have another child to "share" me with and how unsettling that may be, they will not consider me at this time.

Suggested that I give it a couple of years and try again then.

Disappointed but hopeful.

They will be wanting a minimum of 2 years age gap between your BS and any AC. Some prefer 3 or more, generally a bigger age gap is considered 'better' than a smaller one. What age are you thinking?

You could contact neighbouring LAs to see if they have the same view re waiting a couple of years.

wouldlikeanother if you really want to go ahead try another local authority or voluntary agency.

Good luck.

I mean if you want to go ahead, now.