Finally feeling more "real"

[MrsM2509]

Still a bit to go, panel mid July, but sw has said she will be out this week with our completed form f for us to make any comments and sign off on so it can be submitted. It finally feels like the end is in sight! Then the new wait (matching) will (probably) begin which will probably feel like a lifetime!!

Did anyone find that at this stage, it was all you thought about? Throughout the assessment and before, it has obviously been one of the main things on my mind, but now it is usually the only thing!! It could be because my course is now finished with last exam this week so I have more time to think.

Anyway, just wanted to share my excitement with people who understand (and who are probably sick of posts like this which most likely pop up time and time again)

Also, how does it feel to be reading all about yourselves in the form f?

Have been obsessed for a while! Regularly type "adoption" in emails at work!

Approval panel:

(Churchill Voice) Not the end, or even the beginning of the end, but the end of the beginning

tbh the waiting for a match is the worst bit. During homestudy you are doing something. Waiting for a match you are just waiting.

Barbados ha ha that's exactly like me!

Sanders, yeh that's what I mean, it's the end of this bit. And the start of the next, which is the bit that will feel like a lifetime. I'm not the most patient person either! And everyone keeps saying och you'll not wait long there's loadsa kids out there needing families. If I have to say "it doesn't really work like that" once more I'll scream. But they mean well, I know.

MrsM2509 it does tend to take over, don't worry it is natural.

Watch this annoying song and you will get this annoying tune in your head to take your mind off it!

Best of luck.

PS UnderTheNameOfSanders when you said Churchill voice I thought of the car insurance dog!

I hated that bit because I wasn't 100% sure we'd get approved.

And then once I read our PAR I knew we would be approved because it was so nice.

And reading it was totally freaky as experiences go: 'namechanges is a naturally motherly woman who...' Am I? AM I? Since when? If you told my family about that they'd spit tea all over the place laughing. And now I am going to have it framed and put it up in DD's and new AC's room so that when they say 'You're SO unfair' I can point to it and say 'No I have a 'keen sense of social justice' actually

Lol, I think it'll be quite weird reading it too. It'll be nice to see what someone thinks about me, hopefully! I'm looking forward to reading it, a bit

Yes, I've got a feeling it's only going to get harder! I am at a similar stage to you MrsM2509 as I'm also going topanel in July - v nervous and excited and like you can think of little else.

My social worker is a student which makes me feel even more nervous as it is her first PAR and panel. On the plus side she has probably spent a lot longer working on the PAR than the norm but on the negative she's said that it' ll probably be me holding her hand at panel rather than the other way around!

I have decided to throw myself into home improvements and going out (while I still can) over the next month but I think it's going to be a slow one!

Yes, waiting for panel was hard - after all that 'doing' where you get a good feeling because you are doing everything you can to achieve your dream, now it's suddenly just 'waiting' and your fate is completely in the hands of your SW and a panel of strangers.

But tbh when panel was over, there was a brief sense of relief, but then the waiting was all of a sudden, much harder. After panel the waiting is characterised by having no timeframe (you don't know how long you will be waiting); and by having hopes and disappointments. Also when you start looking at profiles, and are waiting for SWs to return calls or to send more info, it somehow feels more urgent - every delay is another precious month (for example) that you are not getting to spend with this particular child, and it is really taking a lot out of me.

But it makes sense to focus on one thing at a time! Good luck everyone with panel! :)