Forgetting

[LastingLight]

Do you ever "forget" that your dc's are adopted? Are you sometimes almost startled when something reminds you of the fact? Dd being adopted is always in the forefront of my mind and after 8 years I'm sick of it. I think the issues we have with bio family has a lot to do with this. And of course spending time on this adoption board doesn't help either!

I'm not sure i I "forget" or not. DS has been having some issues which are probably adoption related at the moment so its more at the forefront of my mind. I'm not sure I forget any more than a bio parent forgets they've given birth to their children.

It just doesn't seem very relevant most of the time. It doesn't get much headroom until it is relevant and then I think about it quite a lot.

I can imagine if you have birth family issues that makes it difficult to fade it into the background.

I do recall having a conversation about a medical issue that I have had, saying that i would extra vigilant with DD as it could be genetic. After a few minutes I realised what I had said. My friend hadn't clicked either.

It is usually "there" though. It's not like I think about it all the time, but if we are having behavioural issues I do think more about it.

I do "forget" from time to time, partly because of the enormity of it all (two people we don't know has a baby but now she is part of our family forever) and partly because about 90% of the time there are no directly linked adoption issues IYSWIM.

I don't forget that they are adopted but I do forget that they are not my birth children. I know that sounds a bit odd but it really is the only way I can describe it.

They are so much a part of me that I forget that they didn't come from me.