Am I too overweight?

[ESBay]

My husband and I have had a very positive initial meeting and report, have had our paper application approved, handed in our CRBs, our referees have all been sent paperwork to fill in and we've been invited on a prep course in May. We are due our medicals next week and I can't stop thinking about the fact that I'm overweight. Our social worker so far has told us it doesn't matter and I'm 'doing' Weightwatchers to show willing. We have a biological daughter and would love to add to our family. I'm a primary school teacher and an active Mum but it's always in the back of my mind. Any positive comments anyone? Can we get right to panel and then be turned down because of it? Will the results of our medicals only be a recommendation or can they say stop the process at that point!? Help!!!

What is your BMI?

Just calculated and it's 48.3 :-)

Thanks bran. I've sent you a message.

Oops! Think you put a reply as I was messaging you!

Really there is no way to know how your GP/medical advisor/panel will react until you've had your medical. My BMI was probably around 40 when I adopted and I struggled to get through a medical with my GP (who was very anti overweight single adopters!) despite not having any health issues at the time.

They will be concerned about a number of things and you need to consider them.

a) general activity and mobility. How active are you with your existing child, do you encourage the family to participate in sports, walk instead of driving etc
b) giving children a healthy lifestyle. DO you understand what is healthy and make sure that your child is fed healthy nutricious food, does your DD have a weight problem?
c) life expectancy. they will be looking for parents who expect to live at least until their child is an adult and beyond into young adulthood.

It will help if your DH is not overweight and doesn't have any high risk factors.

I'll be honest -BMI of 48 is extremely high (and I speak as one whose BMI got as high as 50 so I'm not throwing any stones) and I would be surprised if it wasn't investigated or commented on further. It doesn't mean you will get refused but expect to have to discuss the issue.

Definitely considered all of those things and we really are an active family. We walk to and from school every day, Zumba, swimming, I'm on my feet all day when I teach or when I help at my daughter's school etc etc. I just hope someone sees this!

Please don't be offended, but a Bmi of 48 is in the morbidly obese category, so it will, rightly so, be an issue when you come to have your medical.
Can you use this opportunity to really try and start to lose the weight before you have the medical. If you see your gp or practice nurse now, they then may be able to write a covering letter with your medical form to the effect that you have lost x amount of weight and are doing well. That should help.
Adopting a child is exhausting so if there are any other factors making you even more tired, the harder it will be.

I had to have a second opinion from another GP because my GP wasn;t supportive. Having a supportive GP will definitely help.

Our panel was nearly delayed because the medical advisor said our alcohol consumption "was too high to allow proper parental responsibility". I hit the roof. We had to draft statements about our drinking to show we know how to behave. Our DS was nearly six, so we knew a bit about what having a child entails...but it's not nice for a stranger to declare you unfit on the basis of some answers to a questionnaire. Supportive GP is definitely helpful.