Not adoption but related and I really need your help.

[OhDoAdmit]

Hi I am a long time poster who has namechanged (my intials were TFMDV).

I had the most horrible, awful meeting with SS last night. I was there is a young person I know. Its a long and complicated story and I obviously cant give details on here but I could do with some advice.

Basically the meeting was designed to intimidate the poor child and thank God she wasnt there on her own. She has been for several.

I am at the end of my tether with this LA. They have screwed up time and time again. They have never answered my phone calls or emails despite them being about significant incidents i.e. young person being missing from fc.
They have let this kid down pretty much all her life.

Althought I am not a professional I usually contact them in the manner of a professional IYSWIM. I dont want to now. I want to contact them in the manner of a lay person who is absolutly horrified at what is going on and how this kid is being treated.

I am not a social worker basher. I judge everyone as they are and what the do. But this - this is awful and I cant leave it.

So what do I do? Who do I contact and what do I say?

What a horryfying situation, thank got the young person has you to support them, i am not familiar with ss and fc but i would be tempted to e-mail the managers with specific incidents stating times, dates and names of people you have dealt with and specifying what resolution you would like, also specify a date for contact to be made i.e - i look forward to your reply within a week best regards .......

also i would be tempted to cc the social workers involved and your local MP, the government are currently tring to overhaul the fc and adoption procedures, if that fails, an e-mail to your local paper might be in order, a bit of name and shame.

I know it sounds a bit aggressive but they sound like they are messing you around. Good luck.

Thank you calamity. I am going to do what you suggest. I think it really has to be done.

maryz I have finally managed to hook her up with the local advocacy service and thank God someone was at the meeting to witness it. I am happy to leave the stuff to them now as they are much better suited to it. The LA tend to take them seriously too.

I am so angry at how she has been treated, the way I was spoken to and the fact that they ignored her distress.

When she went to take a breather they actually packed up and left! They shut the meeting down and went home. Without checking if she was ok and without checking if she was coming back.

I think they want her to go into semi independant accomodation. This would mean sharing a house with 3-4 girls and having access to a key worker for a few hours a week.

I am aware that this set up works for some teens and in some LAs it is well run. That is NOT the case in this area and this kid would be eaten alive.

She is NOT ready for this set up. She has no cooking or budgeting skills and is not street wise. Without wanting to sterotype LACs, she is really not your typical LAC (in this area). I think living in a chaotic environment with all the comings and goings and dramas involved would be very, very bad news for her.

The LA know they have a legal duty as she is LAC so they have to do something. They are trying to push her, frighten her into doing what is easiest and cheapest for them.

I am utterly appalled at how she is being treated and feel very let down. I so want SS to do a good job. I hate those SS bashing threads and will often leap to the defence of SWs. But I have to be honest here, they are seriously mistreated this kid.

I have to get it out in an email to them and this time I want a proper response.

i am so pleased that you have found someone else to help fight for this young person and well done you for making the effort, so many people write off teens but with the right support they can be wonderful adults, well done you. :o

Sorry we were clearly typing at the same time then, you must must must send the e-mail, this young person must be protected at all costs, will the advocate be able to help with this situation?? the e-mail also needs to be sent make mention of the appaling way she was treated at that meeting, unbelievable!!! I am like you and dont like the sw bashing that can be done, i have an sn child and have called on ss for help and equipment, and as with all things in life, it is down to the individual people you have to work with, not the service as a whole. In your case though the sevice is clearly flawed and needs to be held to account!! best of luck