Did my autism assessment go wrong?

[Glittarain]

I recently had an autism assessment under right to choose. I feel I probably don't have it. Its more of a tick box thing because of other things.

I'm not sure if it was done in right way there was about 8 tick box forms I had to do each with around 50-90 questions each. You have to tick a box for what answer fits you. But alot of them didn't fit me but I was forced to tick something. So the answers don't show a true me. I said this to the person doing doing the assessment and she said there was several options for the answer. Which there was but they didn't fit me.

She asked me a bit about school about going from primary to secondary. How did I cope with the change I said I went to a sen school the primary and secondary were one school. I just moved rooms with the same peers we stayed in the same class for most lessons apart from things like PE but that was the same as primary the only change was the tutor teacher and I already knew her. She said ah ok then asked the question again the reason I found it hard to answer is because i wouldn't have had the big change that children in mainstream have wheh goung from primary to secondary.

She didn't ask about my learning difficulties maybe it wasn't relivent I'm not sure.

I had also written about how when i was a teenager I used to sit on the floor behinde the teachers desk and avoid everyone. When i was told to move because lesson was starting i would move my chair right back so I was away from people as much as I could be. I didn't talk for a whole school year if I was asked a question I would only ever say yes,no if it was an open question I would say don't know even if it didn't make sense. I wasn't asked about that either. Maybe it wasn't relivent either. But when I mentioned it at the end of the assessment she did have a brief shock face.

Does that seem right?

Are you disagreeing with the results of the test or just querying the process? Was this done to have a formal diagnosis or just a 'tick box thing' for your own interest?

Asking about the process. I don't have a result yet. It would be a formal diagnosis. Its just that what ever the results are i want it to be based on a true me and i don't think that was shown.

When ever I have to do a tick box questionnaire about myself/ about how feel or felt/ my experiences etc OP I similarly feel the options just aren't adequate to explain or cover the answer that I want to give. What I end up doing is ticking a box and then writing in unofficial added information to try and say what I would like to say. I don't know if anyone takes any notice of what i write but it helps me not feel so frustrated at having to reduce things to a straightforward tick when things, for me at least, just aren't straightforward.

Certainly i can totally identify with your behaviour that you talk about in your last paragraph. Very like my own. I am autistic, possibly Audhd. I got a late life unofficial diagnosis from the Clinical Psychologist I was seeing. When I filled in the questionnaire she was sat there with me so I talked through some of my answers with her as I was working through them and that was really helpful.

Edited to say having read your update that I totally empathise with the feeling that tick boxes don't reveal the true " me".

Thank you for understanding. I just don't understand how things can be as straight forward as a tick box. I didn't have the option to ad anything. And there were so many tick boxes that didn't fit that i wouldn't be about to explain.

I guess I have to wait for the report see what it says.

The autism/adhd assessment processes try to put people into silos. The industry tries fit people into neat little boxes labelled ‘autism’, ‘adhd’ or ‘neurotypical’ when no such boxes exist. Fo a start there is no such thing as ‘neurotypical’ and it is certainly not the antonym of ‘autistic/ADHD as so often presented. Life is far more complex than that. Autism is merely the name given to a collection of similar symptoms from a whole range of different ‘brain presentations’, but by labelling only selected similar symptoms this way you are ignoring the fuller picture.

I understand what you're asking OP. The tickboxes are just a guide and give a sort of standard indictor to the assessors. I went through this with my son and he was also questioning the responses - some of the questions he didn't understand, and some of them he felt that none of the tickboxes were quite right so went for the closest.
However the assessment itself is the true indicator - how you responded to the questions you were asked and the information you gave. It sounds very similar to what my son was asked for both his autism and ADHD assessments. He found it difficult because he mostly doesn't remember school (he's 19 so it wasn't that long ago!) and its fair to say that no two people are alike, so the assessors will be using guidelines, but also experience and their knowledge to assess you. He was told his results immediately though (we also went right to choose)

I was thinking similar about people being complex and its not as simple as fitting into boxes. But what also confuses me is they would know that so why is it done.

I couldn't even put the closest thru just didn't fit but I was forced to tick. Abd I feel I wasn't asked about some things that seem big things to me. But maybe they actually are not big things just are to me. I didn't get my results the person said they need to have a meeting to discuss.

There is a natural inclination to want to
put things into neat boxes and there are a lot of powerful lobby groups keen to maintain their power over those boxes. The adoption of ‘Neurodiversity’ is an attempt to try and maintain control of the increasingly acknowledged complexity, whilst still insisting it fits into the same little boxes that they control. You see it when people dismiss a link between learning disability and autism - claiming autism is a separate thing instead of recognising that many have conditions where learning disability and ‘autism’ symptoms are both intrinsic parts of the same condition.

This is why the assessment questionnaires are so difficult for many - they look for autism symptoms whilst ignoring the fact that for many those symptoms are part of much more complex conditions, so the answers never fit.

When it comes to yourself, if you do get an autism diagnosis remember it is an attempt to force just part of yourself into a box. Take what you can from that box - there might be things you find helpful and other things not so much. You are bigger than that box and the box won’t answer all the questions about yourself. There are other assessments you can do, like cognitive assessments looking at executive function, or OT assessments looking at sensory issues or organisational processes (including motor skills). You may have had assessments at school that might look at differently know. They can all only tell you bits about yourself.

Her assessment will be based on other observations as well as the boxes you ticked for the questionnaire. She will take into account how you responded as well as the boxes you ticked - including the fact you told her that many answers didn't fit your experiences.

The questions are frustrating because they don't feel detailed enough to be able to answer accurately. So much depends on context! But they really are just a starting point for discussion in the actual in-person assessment.

My experience was the tick boxes and initial questionnaire in the early stage was an indication of whether or not a diagnosis was probable. If absolutely no signs of autism were present at that stage it would not be sensible to proceed with a full assessment. My assessment started with those but moved on to a much more in depth analysis.

I don't think i would fully believe the answer weather it comes back as autism or not autism because I feel like the assessment and tick box doesn't fit me so that means the decision isn't really based on me either way. If the report sounds like me I may feel a little different but I'm not sure with that either because it would still be based on alot of the tick boxes that are not the right answer so I can't see how the report would fit me either way.

I didn't fully understand the post so sorry if my reply doesn't make sense. I get that the assessment is on other observations AS well as the tick boxes but thats the problem alit of the tovk boxes wete not the right answers so how can they be used. I don't see how she can see how i responded they are just tick boxes and she won't know what ones i answered right and what i answered wrong.

I have already had the in person assessment when I said about the tick box options not fitting me she replied there were lots of choices . So that didn't help ir reassure or help me understand.

I had already answered the smaller section of questions I think there was only about 10 questions I'm guessing that. There wasn't many though that was done in my gp surgery. She said it seemed boarder line. And sent the referral. So the questions/tick boxes I'm talking about in this thread is part of the main assessment. I'm just waiting for the report to come back.

Oh, I see - sorry!

It's certainly possible that sometimes, the tick boxes won't seem fully applicable to you. But there are many, many tick boxes, and the assessement isn't going to be swung on the few that you feel weren't quite right for you.

Ultimately, you're seeing this in a very black and white, all or nothing type of way whereas the assessment will be more nuanced. It's not as rigid as you're imagining it is.

You've said yourself that you don't think you're autistic. If the results come back and they say you are - well, that's fine. You don't have to agree with their diagnosis or accept it or declare it. If you want to completely ignore the diagnosis because you think it's wrong, you can do that.

No it was loads not just a handful i wish i could show you. and along with the assessment asking me things about school which didn't apply to me and even when I explained still asking me.

I get what your saying but i don't think I'm seeing it in black and white as far as I can see was forced into a box that didn't fit me.

I do think its unlikely I have it but I can't really know that for sure. And weather it comes back I do have it or I don't I'm not going to trust the answer either way.

Lots of people with autism find the tick boxes hard because of rigid thinking

I do think its unlikely I have it... I assume it was for a different reason you went to a SEN school then and not due to autism/ND?

All I know is I went to school for children with moderate learning difficulties. Thats all I know it never questioned it.. I'm looking at it now because of how I have been all my life and never understood but theres other possibility as there can be cross overs with other things so I wanted to look at this as well.

I was going to say the same thing!

I think we all have experienced tick box forms where we don't really feel drawn to any of the options, so typically we pick the nearest or most reasonable option to how we feel. It isn't a perfect match (or maybe not a good match at all), but it aligns more broadly than any of the other options. Even if a lot are answered in this way, the thought process and general tendencies could usually be spotted.

Did you just tick any answer? Or did you tick 'the least bad option'?

I have just added a few questions as an example.

Question 39 i don't have conversations with people. I will answer question if I'm asked . I avoid conversation as much as i can so I wouldn't go on and on.

Question 8 i don't have interest.

Question 32 i can't answer that because I can't start a conversation in the first place. So it cant get to can't stop because it doesn’t start and I can't have to keep going until I'm finished because it necer started.

I'm not professional, but surely based on your answers on this thread you must be ND in one way or another? How can it be NT never to start conversations with anyone for example?

You have online conversations with people, you’re doing so now.

Is mumsnet a special interest for you or other online place? Only interacting on MN or Reddit etc

When you have conversations online do people often say things eg that you keep repeating yourself or seem stuck on one train of thought?