How can my son find decent lodgings in north London?

[ParmoParmoPARMO]

Ds (20) has been offered a job in London. He's very keen to spread his wings and start living independently. We live about 40 mins by train from Central London.
The job doesn't pay brilliantly, but doesn't want to commute.
He's decided to look for a place to live.
He's looked on spare room and been to see a grotty flat this evening. Really dodgy vibes. Laminate lifting off the loo floor, mouldy shower curtain. Bleurgh.

Doea anyone know of any 'nice' people who want a clean, hardworking young man as a lodger?! Where would we find such a household? He wants to be north of the river.

40 minutes he's better off living at home and commuting for a bit, he can then put the word around colleagues etc. When I was a new grad lots of share houses came from people who knew someone or you had a mutual third party contact

First post is correct as always

Agree with the first poster, anywhere decent is gonna be £££, even in my area (zone 3, NE) it isn’t unusual for a room inc bills to be £900, and then you’d still be commuting into central, which in itself could be 40 mins depending on where you need to get to.

What’s the budget?

I agree that 40 mins is a normal commute time. It can be over an hour for many people. He can save money by living at home and he’s very close to London for work and meeting friends.

are lodgers a thing now? Shared flats/houses seem more usual though still hard to find

My DP and I are in north London and we are nice 😊 and have a nice flat and a lodger. I also follow house share/lodging pages, posts etc to keep abreast of costs and expectations, and often see much nicer rooms than you’re describing.
Was this definitely a lodger arrangement ie in a house where the owner lives? It sounds more like a grotty room in a grotty shared house. Or is it his budget? Rooms in my area can easily be £800pcm, often more, although we only have Mon-Fri lodgers so don’t charge as much.

Budget? If really tight could consider Property Guardianship.

He mentioned that earlier. What is it??

And yes, 40 mins commute is nothing. I used to work diagonally across town from where I live and it sometimes took an hour and a half.

Budget: as cheap as possible without being grotty!
The one he went to.today was a flat in a tower block. You could see that one of the rooms had been divided in two. The guy showing him around didn't live there..

I'd love for him to find a lovely family to lodge with (he's DBS checked via the local rugby club, has been coaching minis).

Unfortunately he's not yet certain of his hours as the job is in hospitality. Shame he can't 'live in'!

I've said I think commuting until he meets colleagues would be a better way of going about things...but he's adamant!

So what actually is the budget?

Has he looked on spareroom . co. UK ? There seem to be hundreds there

Oh! Sorry, about £800 inc bills.

Yes, but the filters dont seem to work properly! Suggested Blackpool!

Ok, Maybe try doing it a different way? I googled "spareroom London", set the price filter to £800 Inc bills and clicked on "map view". Lots came up, although mostly out of zone 1. He'll find it easier if he looks at transport links and decides which area he'd like to live in.

Honestly- he has to pay for it.

i’ve just been through this with mine. We ended up £300 a month more than our initial budget for somewhere commutable, clean and safe.

Spare room or open rent are your best bets. I also got a better response by excluding agencies and only dealing with properties advertised by the landlord. If you look for live in landlords you’ll often find families advertising annexes or en-suite rooms.

He needs to be realistic, clearly he wants independence but London is not the city which is affordable to do so in. You do sound very naive about this situation. There is so many scams out there especially in a lodger/spare room/ subletting situation and not going through a reputable estate agent. For £800 likely he will spend a small fortune commuting in (because it’s going to be no where near the centre) and if he’s doing shifts depending where he is there maybe some long bus rides on night buses. It’s going to be a very small room possibly single bed with a shared toilet and kitchen with random people, it’s not going to be the same cleanliness standard as home. There’s no living room because that’s also a bedroom to make more money. It honestly is very depressing and I couldn’t wait to leave.

He doesn’t want to but he needs to stay at home, save as much as he can and will likely have a much better standard of living than moving to London. 40 mins is comparable if not better than most central London commutes. What about a car instead to drive to the station and if there’s any shifts he can’t get the train in, then to drive in.

If he’s so adamant let him make the mistake but it’s not on you to source this imaginary flat but help him steer clear of scammers. It’s also not on you to bail him out because once he realises how expensive it actually is when he’s moved.

My advice for him is work hard and work on increasing his wage and CV, make connections if he can at work and think about moving in the future when he’s more financially prepared and has more of a lay of the land.

ps a guardianship property is not an ideal situation. You are essentially paying them to squat in a building and can get one month’s notice to leave at any point.
from google
*a vacant commercial or residential building—such as a former office, school, pub, or care home—that is occupied by vetted individuals known as property guardians in exchange for security and maintenance.
*The government does not endorse or encourage the use of property guardianship schemes as a form of housing tenure, as guardians can be asked to live in conditions that do not meet the standards expected in residential properties, but people have the right to make their own informed decisions about their housing choices. In most cases, property guardianship agreements are usually licences to occupy, which differ from residential tenancies – most notably by only requiring 28 days’ notice before eviction action can proceed whereas for tenancies it can be up to 2 months’ notice.

you are sounding pretty precious here.

does your son want to be a lodger? or does he want to have a room in a shared house? they are totally different things.
i can tell that you want him to be a lodger, but what does he want.

i suspect he won’t mind commuting for more the 40mins, so long as it also means he is living independently?

https://m.spareroom.co.uk/flatshare/flatshare_detail.pl?featured=1&flatshare_id=16559167&search_id=1493688933&search_results=%2Fflatshare%2F%3Fsearch_id%3D1493688933%26

https://m.spareroom.co.uk/flatshare/flatshare_detail.pl?featured=1&flatshare_id=18443347&search_id=1493688933&search_results=%2Fflatshare%2F%3Fsearch_id%3D1493688933%26

https://m.spareroom.co.uk/flatshare/flatshare_detail.pl?flatshare_id=17564890&search_id=1493688933&city_id=&flatshare_type=offered&search_results=%2Fflatshare%2F%3Fsearch_id%3D1493688933%26&

https://m.spareroom.co.uk/flatshare/flatshare_detail.pl?flatshare_id=18267782&search_id=1493688933&city_id=&flatshare_type=offered&search_results=%2Fflatshare%2F%3Fsearch_id%3D1493688933%26&

He should just try South of the river. And live somewhere grotty. We've all done it at 20.

He just needs to think East.

If you don’t earn much you have to live in some of the less nice places!! Reference: I did it for 10 years in London.
mould, carpet moths, roof leaking, mice infestations I’ve had all sorts!!