Words of wisdom for raising teenage girls

[WolfBain]

If you've raised teenage girls well please give me all your words of wisdom. Dd is fabulous but 13 has hit with a full force of hormones and challenges of being a teen. I've been really enjoying the pre/early teen stage of life travelling, watching their interests.and personalities grow, seeing their hopes for the futures etc but I feel like we're just stepping into a new stage that feels the most important but also so hard to navigate. How do you balance raising a good human, making sure they keep up with school/chores/ friends/ hobbies etc and keeping a strong relationship so they can talk to you, know they can come to you if they are in trouble.

Ive no advice sorry, but as a feral teenager a good 15 plus years ago, now a mum to a 4 year old girl and a 4 month old girl.... sat here thinking ✨️karma✨️ is coming for me. I was a total dick as a teenager. I know its coming back to bite me! Anything my mum did to try and help me, I just did the opposite. Hoping someone can give you some good advice so that I can use it too in preparation 😃

Pick your battles carefully, keep an 'open house' so that you know her friends and who is her biggest influence, keep an eye on what she eats (or if she isn't) if you don't like the boyfriend say nothing, don't mention weight/spots/clothes'

Above all, when the chips are down be her mother, not her friend!

BTW, mine is now 34 and bloody fantastic.

Great advice!

Listen when she wants to talk. This will usually be when you are extremely busy or about to sleep. Listening is more important! Be empathetic. Never show that you're shocked. Don't lecture, offer advice or make it about you. Ask her questions and get her to think whatever it is through herself. She'll probably come to a sensible conclusion. If she doesn't let her make her own mistakes, so long as no one will suffer physical injury

Pick your battles. Most things aren't that important really. If she has done something stupid, say so and move on.

Don't bring up previous bad behaviour. She was there, she knows - there's no need to re hash bad times.

Stay interested in her interests. Watch the youtubers she's into every now and then.

Remember friends names. Have good snacks. Be the house they hang out in

Know what your limits/rules are and enforce them consistently. Be able to explain why they matter. Be strong.

Negotiating is fine. Arguing is pointless