Neibhour problems

[Tinker2026]

Just wanted a quick advise. Me and my daughter moved to a new house this june. We have lovely neibhours, however one lady has 2 small kids who she now and again leaves outside and asks others to look after them (babysit). At some point she took one of the kids inside and didnt tell her mum, so mum was worried as she couldnt find her kid. My daughter tried to knock on the ladys door, who became a bit rude about being questened about it. Since then, for the past 3 month as a partten this lady started giving my daughted rude looks, isolate her in front of other kids and make her feel uncomfortable. My daughter, who is 9 came crying twice stating lady next door gave her looks. Whwnever she plays i need to now and again come out to make sure neibhour isnt doing anything she shouldnt.
Two small kids also used to tresspass on my garden patch, grab soil and pull plants. I asked 3 times for her to remove the children from the patch. I am not sure whether i should mantion anything as till now from june i ignored the situation. I feel my daughter cant play freely and worry that a grown up adult does this repeteadly to a 9 yeard old.

Do you have a shared garden? I'm having difficulty seeing how the neighbour can impact your daughter when she is playing in her own garden?

How does the neighbour isolate your daughter?

I’m a bit lost on the pulling of plants. You say you asked for the children to be removed, but then say you’re not sure if you should mention it?

I am concerned you say the neighbour isolates your daughter? Does she physically remove her?!
What is the context when she is giving her looks?

Hi, no, we dont have a shared garden. She doesnt play at the back. She plays with all the kids at the front of the line of the houses.

For example, when all the kids are playing at the front, she says hello and greets all the children as soon as my daughter comes she changed the face and lookd her up and down or makes a face. My daughter was playng at the kids house. The lady knowd their mum. My daughter said neibhour was inside. All she was doing is staring at my daughteg by making her feel uncomfortable or disregarded her when others came to socialize.
Yes. I am not talking about mantioning about pulling the plants sorry, i am not sure whether i shoukd mantion about the situation with looks as it upsets my daughter.

No she doesnt physically touch her. As per above response, my daughter used to smile at her and all the lady did was looking at her up and down and giving her a look.of disdain She came home crying, saying why she is so.mean? As above, when other kids are playing, she smiles greets them, but with my child dhe either cold faced or looking rudely. My daughter says this upsets her.

Kindly, are you okay in yourself @Tinker2026 ? Do you have support?

Yes, i am doing great. Maybe i am just overeacting, however this been going on for 3 month now. I mean it upsets my kid. She should be playing safely not feeling left out of looked at differently!

Has the other woman said cruel things to her?
Is it just the looks thing?

No she doesnt say cruel things to her yet. Its mostly whrn she is playing outdoors i noticed and my daughter said that when there are other kids as i replied, the lady would look my child up and down and give her a look of disdain or roll eyes. She would for example greet and smile to others , but disregard and make a rude face or just stare at my child. There is no apparent readon for her to do so. My daughter says its embarassing. On a few ocassions she needed to give her a look back and the lady looked away. I mean 9 year old shouldnt be doing this! I probobly woudnt be bothered if its a an ocassion. Buts its every day for the past 3 month as a pattern ...you see.

Well winter is coming so I imagine the children won’t be playing out the front. Hopefully by next Spring they’ll have forgotten about whatever happened.

This nieghbour is honestly the lowest of of the low, harrassing a child of 9 is shamesfull.

Contact your Local Authority because she should get a warning off them, as her actions are harassment and to do that to a child is extremly concerning, none if the nieghbours kids should go into her house unsupervised, she is not firing on all cylinders.

Honestly, if it is just funny looks , which can be misinterpreted, Id tell her to ignore it.
The woman isn't putting hands on her, isn't saying things, isn't stopping the other kids from playing with her, it seems like she could just not make eye contact and there would be no issue as all?

Hi, yes, i really hope so. I am hoping itll be a break. Because neibhour is fine with me. I never noticed any looks or anything like this towards me. My daughter is very happy when she plays with her group of friends outside and tries to stick with them and she seems happy.

This is what i thought to me as well. As a mother this is unacceptable. I am on with you on this. To go after a somones random child for 3 month daily giving them looks is unacceptable! The lady is of a ln indian descent. She is not british you see.

Yes i can try and tell her, which i did...but it is hard to do when the kids are all their and parents out. It is constant...so my child constantly has to do it..thats not a way to be at 9 years of age! Constantly being remembered not to look. She already knows this.