Would you report frequent shouting and screaming next door involving a child?

[Concernedneighbour22]

We live in a Naice middle class area next door to a Naice middle class family with one child around 6 years old. Since child was born we have always commented that we never really hear the child laugh, talk and play like you would expect if you live next door to a child. They are out a lot at weekends, but I still find it so quiet like you would rarely there is a child in that house.
Now we have had the warm summer with windows and doors open, they argue a lot. Shouty arguments which goes on for more than an hour. The mum also screams at the child a lot. I don’t mean shouting, but really deranged screaming.
It really bothers me and I wonder if I should report it somewhere. On the other hand, when my children were small I remember shouting at them and them screaming back at me. I worried the neighbours then would think I was an abuser while in reality I had maybe asked them to pick up a sock from the floor.

I most definitely didn’t scream and sound so out of control as this mum though!

What would you do if anything at all?

I genuinely don't understand why you seem to think that living in a "naice" middle class area is important for us to know. If you have concerns, contact the nspcc for advice.

I mentioned it because in my own experience, there are a lot more chaotic families who generally make more noise in not so Naice middle class areas. I think everyone knows that, but we can pretend it’s not so if you prefer. I did not mention it because I don’t think abuse happens in Naice areas just to be clear. Yes I can contact the NSPCC, but I wanted advise from others what they would do.

Yes, I would. There have been too many children lost in the last few years, many of them killed by the people supposed to be caring for them.

Your unnecessary class description of both the area and family is inappropriate. Either the behaviour is concerning or it is not.

Phone the NSPCC for advice.

I must say you seem to have a bit of a strange expectation of what is normal in family life if your relationship with your children was one of you shouting and them screaming.
Yes i would report what is happening next door. It does sound concerning.

Always report

could be nothing and could be something

always report

Report.

It is not your, or our, job to decide if there is a safeguarding issue or not. It is our job to report concerns and let the professionals decide.

Please also mention that the house is unusually quiet aside from the screaming and you don’t hear normal childhood noises of laughter/playing.

You can call your local Multi Agency Safeguarding Hub, their number will be on Google.

Middle class people can be abusive and chaotic too.

Some of the worst kind of abuse and neglect occurs in "naice" households, except it goes under the radar a lot more because of outward appearances and "better" surface presentation. You can ring the NSPCC as others have suggested, you could also make an anonymous report to your local safeguarding service. Google children's services in your area.

Whenever I do safeguarding training (HCP), they say to report if you are concerned. It’s rarely one individual report that helps to identify a problem, each person who flags concerns is a piece of a jigsaw puzzle. It may be teachers/nursery staff have flagged concerns but can’t be sure something is happening at home. Safer to report. Also sounds like the Mum may benefit from professional support with parenting.

It’s not inappropriate. I think it’s much easier for middle class parents to “get away” with abuse as they hide it better behind closed doors. Let’s be real about that.

You are really reaching there. I am talking about very young children and yes my DS had tantrums where he would be screaming at me over tiny little details and yes I sometimes did shout at them. I didn’t scream at them for prolonged periods of time in a deranged way though.

Thanks to those who have given good advise here.

Yes this was my point about the Naice households. The mum is a teacher herself at the local school.

i did. (not a naice area).

social work came out the next day.

no come back on me so dont know what was said. hopefully they didn’t mention neighbours complaining. or if they did i wasn’t suspected!

nothing changed. still shouting and useless parenting, weed smoking etc.

I reported a child constantly crying who lives next door to my partner, if it’s nothing then fine, but I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t at least get it checked out. It could
be that the family need support or whatever regardless of class we are all
human and living in a nice house doesn’t
change that, so yes I’d report.

I agree.

Sorry but I don't think I was over reaching given the description you gave of your family dynamic.

Yes, share your concern.
Safeguarding is everyone's responsibility.

Class does not determine if you will be abused but by your post, it obviously determines if someone will report it 🙄

Definitely report.