Avoiding "lifestyle creep" when coming from being skint?

[Lifestylecreep]

I've read about "lifestyle creep," the idea that you avoid luxuries when your income goes up so you don't overspend. But how do I do this if I'm coming from nothing?

Due to caretaking duties (mum had cancer and dad with dementia) as well as two young DC, I've worked minimal hours for the past eight years, plus mat leaves in between. Things have been very tight financially but we've managed by being extremely budget conscious. Mum died last year, dad's moved to a carehome, and my youngest is no longer in nursery. I also did my Master's and managed to move up two bands. So suddenly we have quite a bit more money coming in each month. It feels wonderful to have a bit of breathing room but I am also wary of spending it all away, also with cost of living. (We are far from wealthy, I'd say with my paylift and increased hours I'm nearing the middle class.)

But for example, I went eight years without buying a new pair of shoes. I'd love to treat myself! Or DH has been managing with the same winter coat for all this time, it's really time for a replacement. But that takes a large bite out of the extra £400/month I have now. (Not that I'd buy new shoes every month or anything!)

So any suggestions for balancing a modest increase in income with things that feel luxurious but are needed?

I put half of every pay rise into savings and half into spending. It means I get to live my life whilst building up a pot that can be used as runway if we ever need to adjust back again.

Maybe put some of that salary rise in your pension, then you won’t see it in the bank account. And you get the tax benefit into your long term savings.

Then set yourself a reasonable budget each month, a bit more generous than previous, with room for treats for you all, but put those essentials in place first.

Then if you have left over start building the emergency fund first, then each month “jam jar” some for bigger stuff like car, home or holidays, some for investments (start an ISA somewhere like Investengine, maybe even a JISA for the kids - try Freetrade too) and don’t forget to live a little - after you have lost people close to you there is the realisation we are only here once x

Save some, spend some on good quality stuff that will last.

It's tricky to get the balance right, but saving enough to be able to replace white goods or get the car fixed or whatever really helps when the inevitable happens.