Comical thread for things people have lied about during early doors dating

[Healingsfall]

... that they thought you'd never find out! 😄

After my recent thread about a guy who lied about the ages of his young kids to get a date I thought I would do a general one.

Let's face it dating is tedious, so we may as well have a laugh 😃 So what has a date (man or women) ever lied about thinking the date would never find out/hoped they'd just never mention it 😆 It could be something odd, silly, or just plain bizarre!

A guy l dated said he was a football player for a team in the league.
( didn't have Internet back then).
Wasn't until l met his sister 6 months later.. she told me he had a trial but never played for them
. Just a small town local club.
Relationship ended soon after.

And he just thought you'd never find out! 🤣

A bloke told me his best mate (who was on the date with us, along with one of my friends- it was a double date as I was only 16 and the guy was older than me so we each took a friend along) worked for Aston Martin and got to drive their cars all the time. I’m sure this could have been really impressive information, except I had never heard of Aston Martin because I was 16 and not remotely interested in cars (or James Bond). So when he delivered this impressive bit of information, I just said: ‘Oh right. I work at the bakery’. 😂

I've remembered one. I was seeing this guy and went to his, he had a room in a shared house so his room was his bed/lounge/wardrobe. I noticed these gross crocks by his wardrobe and just casually said do you where crocs 😆 to which he so casually said no, I only wear them to put the bins out etc. A short time later we became Facebook "friend" and looking at his pictures there they were, the offending crocs, in the majority of pics 🤮

That wasn't why it ended lol, but it did end due to a catalogue of lies, but those crocs 🤨

A date told me she was very easily pleased in bed. Reader, she was not.

Not a lie during a date, but before, going on a blind date, agreed the venue, told the guy what I would be wearing, he told me he was 6'2" and black hair.
Arrived at the venue looking for this guy, he recognised me, he was about 5'7" and nearly bald. Worst date ever.

I dated a guy who lied to me about his name for almost three months. He did turn out to have an incredibly ugly name, to be fair.

Ex told me he had seen Frank Sinatra at one of his last concerts. I was dead jealous. Some years later , after we were married, I mentioned “ That time you saw Sinatra..Im still really jealous’…He looked at me puzzled and said “ Oh that was a lie! I just said it to impress you”

We divorced ..that was one of his most innocent lies.

My husband gave me to understand that he lived in a separate wing at his parents large old house. So I just said I'll stay over if you like. Then his parents came in from a night out and I was so mortified in the morning I'd never even met them and wasn't young I was divorced with a couple of kids and he was much younger than me. Many many years later, it's all good but I still blush when I think of it. (His bossy mother was fuming at the time and affronted 🤣🤣)

I went on a date with a man who lied about his height, and used an old photo on the dating site.

I'm short at 5"1 so have no problem with dating short guys. This guy said he was 5"7, but I didn't like to ask him where the other 4 inches were.

I didn't take him up on a second date

I was asked for dinner by a work colleague. Turned out to be at his house where he lived with his mum, dad and auntie and we had dinner with them - luncheon meat salad and a cup of tea.

A long time ago, back in ye olden days, I had two actual live-in partners in a row who lied about money. Did my nut in. I only ever found out the detail of the bullshit when I sat down trying to devise monthly household budgets because they were always, always broke, and I couldn't understand it.

Basic things like how much they earned turned out to be wrong. No, pal, when you earn £20k a year you don't earn 'two thousand pounds a month'. It's 20 divided by 12, not 10 - and that's the gross.

One of them swore his car cost 'eighty pounds a month to run'. That's because he put twenty quid's worth of petrol in it a week. When I worked out all the annual running costs including insurance, maintenance etc, and divided it by 12, it came to £245 pcm.

Some mothers do 'ave 'em, I guess.

Lied about his age for the entire three years we were together.. when I found out I left him.

I was 16 when I met him and turns out he was 30! I thought he was 25, still too old but I didn't realise at the time. Awful looking back.

My birth mother - tells me that she went out a few times with a lad who said his name was (say) Tommy Smith. By the time she realised she was pregnant he'd disappeared from their neighbourhood. When she asked around she was told he was probably actually called (say) Jimmy Brown, last heard of on his way to London.

I went on a blind date. It was through a magazine ( in the olden days). He said his name was Craig.

Met up and when I said 'hi Craig' he said 'hi, my name is actually Brian, but I was worried you were someone from my work so gave you a false name' 🤔

Didn't get another date.

Another told me he was a widower ( sympathy vote, he was late 20s) turns out he'd been separated for 5 years when his wife died. So technically he was. He didn't get a second date either.

Snap!!! This was long pre- internet days tho and I went out with him for a long time.
Then with t’internet I searched the club’s history of players and his name’s nowhere to be seen…….. It might be 40 years ago but I don’t forget. Or forgive. 😡

Was it Keith?

Lying about age seems common. A guy had on his profile he was 43, after looking him up on Google (he had a business) he was 49. I don't think he would ever confessed ! Told me he didn't thing women my age (then mid 30s) would go for a 49 year old 🤨

My husband pretended to like eating fish in order to impress me 🤷🏻‍♀️😂

Mine told me he'd been to New Zealand. If flying over it, en route to another destination counts.

I apparently told my DP I’m a neat and tidy person, I don’t remember this but it was definitely a big fat lie. It’s possible I meant compared to my student flatmates which was a very low bar

That it was his second ever bumble date