WhatsApp and the ticks

[Getonnow]

When I send a message to most of my friends, it goes to 2 grey ticks (delivered) almost immediately. Then for most people 2 blue ticks once they've opened it, although some people have it set so it never moves off grey. All good, I understand.

With one friend, it stays on one grey tick (sent, but not delivered) for ages. Once it goes to two grey ticks, it moves to blue quickly and he usually responds almost straightaway.

Obviously, there are reasons I'm over thinking this, but what is actually happening? Why are these messages taking so long to be delivered?

Perhaps he is putting his phone in airplane mode. You can read all the messages then without you knowing.

Then when he turns airplane mode off again, it will show and delivered and then read.

Do you have another phone, you could try sending him a wattsapp from a different phone and see if the same thing happens.

DS puts his phone in plane mode when he's busy and doesn't want to be bothered then switches it back on when he wants to check messages.

My dad's phone is like this, it drives me mad.
The WhatsApps don't deliver until he physically opens the app. He has his data on.
It's happened since he got a new phone, no idea why.

This happens to me every now and then. It's a setting to do with the battery saver.

Mine need to be altered in WhatsApp and in the phone settings too. That's another reason why I just don't bother having them on and check when it suits me, but he might want to set them on permanently.

You can then manage settings for individual chats.

@isthismylifenow @EmmaEmerald
Thank you both I'll get him to try these things.

I don't know what to think now. He's asked me for a lift to something we're doing at the weekend. I'd made a general offer and will be picking up others too. I've said of course, I'll need your address.

He's said he'll send it on Friday or "it will get lost in the 100s of messages we send". So he's acknowledged there are a lot, but me turning up at his house doesn't appear to be a problem.

You can "star" messages as reference points.

just passing on a reference point 😂

Does he have a profile photo?
Do you know what you are saved on his phone as?

My first thought is that he has you blocked during times when he doesn't want your messages to come through and then unblocks you when he's more free to read and reply to your messages, hence why they are so sporadic. He may forget to take you off block at times which would account for the longer periods of no contact.

@JoleneTookHerMan pretty sure if someone does block and unblock, you don't see the messages sent to you while the block was on.

@EmmaEmerald you are right, didn't think of that!

My friend's does this because she turned off push notifications, so the app only refreshes it when she opens it. She was sick of constant messages.

My phone has a flip to shhhh mode which basically puts it on DND if I put it face down. DH has a similar phone and couldn't work out why he would get loads of notifications all at once when he picked his phone up. Does he have a Google phone?

I don’t have notifications on any apps except iMessage, and also have the “last seen” thing on WA disabled. Nothing sinister or secretive, I just want to be in charge of when I see stuff!

And what happens if you read the message on your Apple Watch?

It's where notifications have been turned off so they don't get it delivered until they go into the app. My friend had hers turned off and the exact same thing was happening

I'm so confused
I do this

So people actually are going to see when the message is read by me, rather than delivered? Because I thought I was turning off notifications, not delivery, if you see what I mean.

So by default, with the 3 tick thing turned off permanently, they will see tick 2 and assume I've read it. Gah.

I almost started a thread on this very thing OP!

Same thing happens with the guy I'm dating and I've wondered about it. I think it's because he likes to focus on his work for long periods but sometimes I do wonder about it.

Now I think about it, I also have notifications turned off and wonder if others get the same from me!

It'll be one tick until you open the app,.two grey ones when you open the app, then two blue ones when you're in the chat with the person

They could be like me and have turned off all the features that people can use to keep tabs on you

My sister is a fierce data watcher and communicating anything by WhatsApp is very irritating! We have a WhatsApp group with my other sister - mainly to sort out visits, appointments etc to our elderly mum who lives on her own. You get no response at all from her during the day when it matters and then she replies about 11.30 pm when she’s turned it on again! I understand that she has a right to do what she wants but it can cause real irritation.
She is just the same with texts.
Her right to choose trumps all requests for her to change apparently.
What would you do?

@Lala87 Thank you

@Fushia123 Does she expect you to respond at 11.30pm? That's not on. Alternatively, if you're worried about her missing important stuff, I guess you just have to phone.