A place to tell your worst dating stories

[broomers]

A newly single friend is back on the dating scene and had a bit of a disaster date yesterday. I met DH via online dating and went on about 25 first dates and was telling my friend I wish I'd have kept a dating diary I would love to read back on all my disasters so thought it might be fun to share some!
I'll start, met a guy who kept going to the loo every 20mins and talked constantly about drugs, no judgement but def not my scene, then took a call mid date from another girl he'd been on a date with as they were off to do acid on Hampstead heath on Saturday he told me after. Lived off a trust fund and his mother was selling an apartment in Marylebone as he didn't want to live there so he could move to a different part of London. I said I was going to the loo, called an Uber, and snuck off out the pub without telling him I was leaving

When I was 17, a date gave me a lift home on his motorbike. When I got off it, I caught my ankle on the exhaust pipe, welding my new tights to my tender flesh.

Ouch that sounds painful! Did you ever see him again?

The one who tried to convince me the bar we’d arranged to meet outside of was closed, when I’d just been in to use the loo and reserve a naice table. Then he started sweating profusely and said “look I just can’t go in there okay” and drove off at 100 mph.

Another married one 🙄

Oh and the one I’d been chatting to for ages who badgered me for a selfie and then - immediately after I sent it - announced he’d decided to finish his PhD on Ayn Rand rather than date. And blocked me.

What a couple of catches eh

The guy who it turned out was my teenage dd’s RE teacher………, and he wore a rakishly tied spotted handkerchief scarf round his neck.

An Objectivist? You had a lucky escape.

One and only OLD meet. The guy was lovely at 1st.
Ate like an animal.
And i cant remember id said something about when I was a kid and misbehaving as that's where somehow the conversation went.
. He said well if we get together. You will never misbehave and you would do as you're told at all times.
I said i beg your pardon?
He repeated it glaring at me.

I passed him the cash for my meal and told him to fuck right off.
Taxi home

Why don't wannabe Doms join the scene? Good ones are like gold dust, there are always way too many subs and not enough Doms. Then again, anyone who thinks this is the way to start a D/s relationship, especially on a mainstream date, wouldn't be welcome anyway. Hopefully they effectively self select out of the gene pool.

I used to use online dating-I met dp on there
before him I went on a few dates

one-we met in the pub-nice bloke,but bloody boring (he fitted bathroom fans-I know everything there is to know about bloody bathroom fans)-it wasn’t going to go any further
we walked back (I claimed I lived 4/5 streets further than I did) and we stopped off at the chippy
i went to pay but he insisted he should pay-fine,whatever
i left him,walked round the block with my chips and went home
id been home about half an hour when I got a message demanding £1.90 for my chips as I hadn’t come onto him and we hadn’t had sex-he was willing to meet me at mine for the money
i blocked him

another one-we arranged to meet up in town-outside a t-mobile shop
he greeted me and disappeared into the shop
he came back out and announced he’d bought a car tracker for his ex wife’s car
oh,and did I fancy a costa?
I’m too polite said yes-to which we went in,he ordered his coffee and fucked off to the loo to let me pay for it
again,I’m too polite and we ended up sitting for two hours while he showed me endless pictures of his ex (during sex,in childbirth and afterwards-this is before revenge porn was a thing)
oh and I got all the details about how she was living with their dd in a womens refuse because ‘I only hit her once’
it was ok though-she’d told him the address and they where meeting up for sex but he wanted to know her every movement-hence the car tracker and he had got hold of her phone records and was monitoring her there as well
he then dragged a massive vibe (I’m talking a huge,flesh coloured cock-at least 12 inches long and 5 inches wide) out of his carrier bag ‘this is what I used with ex,we can use it later-I only know how to fuck ex so it’ll be the same for us’
I declined another date and ran for the hills-he tracked me down via sm so I blocked him

another one (I met this one in a pub)
went on a date-turned out he was the uncle of my ex-my controlling-never paid a penny for our two children-beat me up endlessly-and took everything I owned when we broke up-ex
this guy sat and told me that my ex couldn’t afford to pay for the kids and that I’d trapped him by having them (utter bollocks-he could afford a car,van and endless holidays abroad)
it was my own fault for ex to have hit me,controlled me and everything was my fault in the relationship
I made my excuses and fucked off
the following night,just after closing time there was a massive banging on my front door
it was date guy and my ex (who until that point didn’t know where I lived-uncle must have followed me home)
I ignored them-so they came back every night,banging on my door,just after midnight-for two weeks
id often see ex’s van parked outside my work,home and college with them both sat inside,just staring at me
i rang the police,who to be fair where amazing and ‘had a chat’ and it all stopped
but,I’m still the slag who shagged both uncle and nephew (I didn’t sleep with uncle but why let the truth get in the way of a good story?) and rang the police when I got bored of him

I gave up on dating for about a year-dipped my toe back in and met my now dp-been together 7 years

The time I went on a date with a woman hater was interesting.

Met up in a local pub and he spent the entire time telling me angry stories about how women had been terrible to him. How they are all gold diggers, users and bitches and that I'd better not be like that as well. The hostility was really in my face.

I left after one drink and blocked him. Very uncomfortable.

I met some charmers. Best (worst) was the chap who said he couldn't date me because I used too long words and he couldn't be someone who was cleverer than him. Male ego and all that