If you had to lick a chair...

[Mysterian]

...what chair would you lick?

I'm thinking about the King's throne in the House Of Lords. Only sat in once a year by somebody with a lot of robes. I'm sure it gets cleaned a lot.

Or some remote metal bench after a good rainstorm.

Haha very random thread but I kind of like it. Maybe a chair in Willy Wonkas factory. I bet he has edible ones of all flavours

😕

Ooh no, that chair would be covered in some kind of textured fabric like velvet ughhhhh the thought of licking the fibres (even worse, against the grain)

I would lick a metal bench that's by the seaside, like one of those they put on the end of a pier. Something that gets absolutely battered by sea spray and wind.

My own chair as only I sit on it and I wouldn’t have to move 😂.

I was also thinking about a stool in some kind of high tech ultra clean lab.

Thinking about it again, velvet thrones are off. Licking velvet would feel gross even if it were perfectly clean.

David's chair in "The lost boys"😋🥰

A brand new one

This reminds me of something I read on FB which said that whatever surface you imagine licking, you totally already know what it would be like and the sensation you’d feel even when you’ve never licked it in your life. And it’s true, isn’t it? Your tongue just knows.

Personally it would be a smooth leather chair, for me.

I'd probably lick my dining chair if I had to. Only certain spots though, we have animals.

One made of biscoff

I never imagined I would be thinking about this

I am going to opt for the wooden chair in my garage that has been very well wrapped up for the last year.

Ryan Reynolds chair 🤣

You're on much more interesting FB groups than me.

You're not wrong though. There must be some kind of Universal Tongue Mind.

A recently cleaned plastic chair in the private hospital frequented by the Royals

Probably a chair in a top level laboratory if some sort, because I think they’d be Uber clean.

Or a chair that had literally just been made in the chair making… place. Never touched or sat on before.

@Tygertiger oh my god that's so true!

Would it no taste chemically though? Or of some plastic, varnish, cleaning stuff or whatever? I'm weird though and wipe down anything that comes in the house and wash clothes before wearing them. I'm sure others do it too but from other threads I think I'm in the minority. I always think what has been in the air at the factory or has a mouse pooped on it or I'm sure they used to put stuff on clothes to make them look nicer and crease free on the hanger.

A chair sculpted from frozen Baileys

A chair an actor I fancy like mad had just sat on naked.

Good point. Maybe I should lick a chair at my own house but given that I’ve met my kids I don’t know if I’d be any better off!

You might not fancy them any more after you've kicked their arse crumbs off a chair

😂