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Original poster

Can I do anything else?

32 replies

clockapp · 12/11/2022 01:24

I'm so ashamed. I went to the gym earlier, I'm very fat. I had a good workout and was feeling so good about myself and my starting journey.

I was getting changed. I was fully naked and I saw a flash go off as I bend down. I looked up and this girl had her phone pointed at me and she'd clearly taken a photo of me or at least near me. I asked her wtf she was doing and she looked mortified. I guess she hadn't meant to have the flash on? She said it was a mistake; so I asked to see her phone and she said she'd delete it. I saw the photo and I'm naked looking like jabba the hut, she deleted it.

I reported her to reception, they were so apologetic and then I sat in my car and cried, I've gone on my phone and I can recover deleted photos. Can this woman put my photo online? I should have insisted the receptionist call the police but I just wanted to leave.

Can I call the police in the morning and give them the info of the gym and what happened? Can they make her fully delete it?

Why the fuck would you do that? I know I'm fat but I'm still a person. I'm never going back to the gym.

OP posts:
travellinglighter · 12/11/2022 01:29

Oh god, that’s awful. I’d call the police in the morning. I’m not sure if it’s a crime but it’s definitely horrible.

LearnerCook · 12/11/2022 01:35

Oh what a horrendous thing to experience, OP! I'm so sorry this cruel woman has done this to you. It certainly says far more about her than it does about you.

Well done on making a start your weight loss process. Please, please don't let that *** derail you.

I don't know if the police could do anything, but it couldn't do any harm to call the non-emergency number and ask.

Sending a hug.

Maze76 · 12/11/2022 01:45

Dont let this vile woman stop you going to that gym- if anyone should leave it should be her! On principal I would go back and HOPE to see her again to shame her.
please don’t let this creature ruin it for you.

Original poster
clockapp · 12/11/2022 01:53

I think I will ring the police. I'm going to do it now so I don't chicken out and put my head in the sand tomorrow. My DH said it reflected badly on her and not me and I know that. It's just really shaken me up.

OP posts:
KateBalesCardi · 12/11/2022 02:28

That's one of the most disgusting things I've ever heard of anyone doing OP, I'm so sorry that happened to you. That person is the lowest form of life but I know that won't help with how you're feeling right now, it's upsetting seeing how utterly horrible people can be. I hope you get some kind of justice and reassurance from the gym or the police, sending sympathy and an unmumsnetty hug Flowers

Soulstirring · 12/11/2022 02:44

Awful behaviour. Please do call the police, it’s such a violation. Also, demand a refund from the gym if you have a membership and go else where if you don’t feel comfortable being there. Please don’t give up either, you’ve taken the first steps in a journey and they’re the hardest. Well done

FurryDandelionSeekingMissile · 12/11/2022 02:59

You have nothing to be ashamed of. She should be very ashamed.

I understand that it's excruciating for you, though — I'm also fat and struggle with the idea of people commenting on or laughing at my body, and this situation would upset me so much. But I think you should go back to the gym. We fat people belong there just as much as anyone else does, and people like that don't deserve to be able to drive us away. Perhaps there's a more private changing area you can use for a while, and even if that's not normally available you could tell staff you require it because of what you've been subjected to on their premises?

Habreathmint · 12/11/2022 03:02

Call the police and also hound the gym to ban this nasty cunt. It's illegal, immoral and a hate crime. Disgusting. Don't lwg her get away with it. This bitch didn't...

www.theguardian.com/us-news/2016/nov/04/dani-mathers-playboy-model-snapchat-gym-locker-room-lawsuit

RogersOrganismicProcess · 12/11/2022 03:06

Awful op, that photo says nothing about you and everything about her. Sending you lots of strength. Don’t let the actions of this insecure nasty little cunt define you.

ImustLearn2Cook · 12/11/2022 03:09

I agree with pp that she should be banned from the gym. Surely her actions had to have violated some kind of gym membership rules.

ImustLearn2Cook · 12/11/2022 03:11

And her behaviour was vile. You shouldn’t miss out on your gym membership because of her.

LunaAndHerMoonDragons · 12/11/2022 03:13

I agree police and gym, she deserves to be the one unable to go. I hope you don't let her out you off, this is nothing about you, it's all her, she's a horrible person.

Ilovetocrochet · 12/11/2022 03:20

I am also very fat and would have been mortified if someone had taken my photo! I think you were very strong to challenge her, I’m not sure I would have the confidence to do that.

I went swimming this week for the first time in 25 years and once I was in the pool, I felt hidden from view! Next time I go, I am going to take a towel to the pool side so I can get wrapped up straight away on leaving the water rather than have to parade through the mixed sex changing area to get a towel from my locker!

tryingtoholdittogetheralways · 12/11/2022 03:28

Good lord. That's horrific. At the very least the gym need to ban her, that's awful behaviour. I'm sorry that happened to you, please don't let that stop you on your journey

Sleepyquest · 12/11/2022 03:32

Well done on confronting her. The gym should definitely ban her. How can some people be so cruel?
Hope you are ok

ImustLearn2Cook · 12/11/2022 03:41

FWIW I am overweight now but even when I was younger and slimmer if someone had done that to me I would have felt the same way as I would now: embarrassed and violated.

Hope you’re okay.

BitOutOfPractice · 12/11/2022 03:45

Yes I think you should insist she be banned from the gym as an absolute minimum.

what a horrible woman she is.

AriettyHomily · 12/11/2022 04:41

What a scum bag she is. Sorry that happened to you op.

Whataretheodds · 12/11/2022 04:51

Yes absolutely you can and YY to expecting the gym to bar her.

Why the fuck should she try to make you feel ashamed for taking care of your physical and mental health?

cocktailclub · 12/11/2022 05:00

Call the gym and ask them what they are going to do as in ban her.
Please don't give up going to the gym, maybe change gym if that would help.

autienotnaughty · 12/11/2022 05:08

That's horrific and surely it's a crime? There's laws around upskirting and sharing nudes et so it can't possibly be acceptable to take a picture of a naked person. Also how you look (or how you feel about yourself) makes no difference that's not part of the problem. Do the gym no who the person is? I'd go back and officially complain to management the person needs to be barred. Also ring the non emergency police.

Original poster
clockapp · 12/11/2022 11:51

Thank you for your support last night. I called 101 and they sent some officers out to take my statement this morning and they said they've spoken to the gym. They're going to speak to her today (police not the gym). It is a crime and I can press charges

OP posts:
BobbyBobbyBobby · 12/11/2022 11:55

What a nasty thing for her to do!

You are on a journey to lose weight, be healthy and become a better you.

That woman is never going to change her rotten personality.

If the gym ban her which I think they should, then go back with your head held high.

jamontoastaddict · 12/11/2022 12:02

Jesus Christ that is awful.

She is a vile human being.

I would be inconsolable. Press charges.

I don't know what else to say. The gym need to ban her. Do they have no mobile signs up in the changing rooms?

whitramp · 12/11/2022 12:02

That's absolutely horrific. Well done you for taking action