If you are married/in relationship do you find other people attractive

[NintyNine2619]

I’m in a long term relationship with 3
dc together. I have just started going to the gym and the instructor is so nice looking. I reallY fancy him and find myself thinking about him all the time. This isn’t normal is it?

Of course it's normal to be attracted to others you are only human.

Yes, as above- it's totally normal.

Yes, of course. You have eyes and a heartbeat 😀
There is a world of difference between thought and action though.

Oh good!! Was starting to feel guilty!

Sure. I've had crushes on my children's swimming instructor, colleagues, bar staff... I'm married not dead. But the 2D knowledge I have of that person who might be nothing like my image of them, isn't a patch on the depth of knowing my dh to his bones and loving everything he is. So it's no competition, it's just a passing nod to the fact that other nice people exist, and if I wasn't attached maybe I'd flirt and see if it was reciprocated, but I am attached and what I've got is good so it's surface attention only.

Yes, it’s normal (and most ofnus fond gym instructors attractive). If you find yourself obsessing on it then what you need to do is remove yourself from situations where you see that person a lot.

If it’s happening with a lot of different men then that probably means you’re not getting enough sex / male attention and should try to improve things with your partner.

Totally normal and fine, as long as it all stays in your head! And good motivation for going to the gym

Yes, normal. I've had a few crushes over the years. They fizzle and fade with time. Never made me doubt anything re my marriage or dh.