What are your basics of self-care/wellbeing

[Communionmom]

I'm in a bit of a slump. I don't have depression. I don't feel well at the moment (I actually think I might have a mild flu)and I have to persuade myself to have a shower but even when I'm "well" I don't feel particularly good. I'm about 3 stone overweight, have very little energy or motivation and don't feel like me.

I really want to build a checklist, of what the basics are so I can say "Ok, I've done the basics, it was a good day". I tend to be a bit all or nothing. I set unrealistic expectations - like I'll stick to 1000 calories a day and exercise for an hour a day. Which I might manage for a week or two and then I don't manage it and feel like a failure.

So for me I'm thinking

1. Shower - I prefer a morning shower but with the school run, during term time I generally have an evening shower.
2. Drink at least 1.2 liters of water a day
3. Exercise - Do something everyday. Usually walk the dog is a standard (but he's old so it's a 30 minute amble really) but I really want to get back into weights and yoga. I don't believe in 10,000 steps as there was no research behind that, it was just a nice round figure for people to aim for.
4. Wash face and brush teeth am and pm.
5. Eat mainly unprocessed food everyday. To be fair, I think I mostly do this anyway with some exceptions (bread!!, although DH does actually make bread sometimes)
6. Purely for me - Intermittent fasting. I combine 16:8 and 5;2
7. No alcohol. This is a big one. Over lockdown, DH and I started drinking a lot more. 2 young children and DH was suddenly working in the bedroom of a small house. We've adapted so things aren't as bad but still more than I want to - and it leads to an increase in snacking.
8. Vitamins. I'm taking Vit D but I'm really not sure if I should be taking anything else.
9. Perfume and/or jewelry. In an effort to give myself a boost I try to remember to put on perfume/body spray and jewelry every day. I don't always remember but I try!

So anyone else want to join in? What are your basics? Any recommendations on what I could be doing?

Imo what’s really missing from your list is time to relax/self care.
Everyone is different there but having time fir yourself, doing something you enjoy fir the sake of it, something that helps you relax is essential.
For me it looks like

• having a Bath with Epsom salts. It also helps me sleep better


• Journalling


• smiling


• seeing friends


• laughing (think comedy show etc…)

i have a friend who swears by cross stich, another who is tree hugging
but whatever you enjoy doing is a good start.

I think something that you used to do for fun that you don't do any more. E.g. read, see friends, craft etc. Something you have maybe replaced with scrolling since you don't have the energy to even want to have fun. I know that's how I get when I'm in a slump and the only way out of it is to do something I enjoy, off of my phone.
Also please please don't ever eat under 1500 calories a day. 1000 calories a day plus exercise is so so little and you will probably damage your body in some way.

I like the list but it would be too much for me to do every day. If I set those expectations I'd be disgruntled very quickly.
Baseline is
Shower
Teeth
Water
Walk.

Good catch.

I do actually read everyday. Sometimes actual physical books but a lot of the time it's kindle unlimited "magical mystery" which are a bit of a guilty pleasure but I guess reading is reading!

Gardening- fresh air , exercise and a sense of accomplishment.

Train- usually between 1-5-2.5 hours a day, weights and Brazilian jjuijitsu

Sleep- try to get 7-8 hours regularly

Drink - water at my desk

Wash after excersize and face and teeth twice a day

Spend time in the country side by trees and water with my dogs, walk them cuddle them and love them

Chat to my kids daily

Lots of sex with my dp, talk, really talk every day and tell each other we love each other when ever we say bye

Sleep is my basic that so much else hinges on.

@bjjgirl you do that daily? Sounds like the perfect life

I work shifts so I get up at 530 to gym then work a 7-5 then train until 830, by doing 10 hour shifts I get ore days off to walk the dogs and when I am on lates walk then of a morning. It's very planned but it maintains my mental health (adhd)

Will walk dogs 4 times a week the long nice walks (I do live infrint of a lake thou in the countryside)

My absolute basics are wash face, strip wash, brush teeth, brush hair, moisturise face, wear clean underwear, squirt of perfume. I've only missed these if I've been in hospital and even then not all of them.

I also try and eat some real food every day, something fresh, not just junk.

Mine is

Shower
Skincare twice a day
Teeth twice a day
Move - even if it's a 10 min stretch or barre class
Vitamins (multi and a vitamin d)
Don't eat breakfast so I guess intermittent fasting!

Vitamins - add magnesium to your daily vitamin routine, it helps regulate moods.
Listen to music every day.

Make sure I clean teeth, wash, change clothes.
Have tidy bedroom
Wash the days dishes

Read
Listen to Alexa

Have something to plan for..A family outing, a holiday, a party, a meal etc. It doesn't have to be a hig event. I am currently planning a little teaparty for my little family of 3! Before that it was a cinema trip. If I don't have anything to plan for I feel sad. I have only just noticed this about myself.

There are a lot of these threads atm.
If not for MN, I would have thought it was just me.

For me the absolute minimum is:
Teeth and brush hair at least once a day.
Shower at least every 2 days.
Leave the house every 3 days.

Mine would be a mixture of basic together with nice things that I enjoy doing.

Ideally it would be:

daily shower,
brush teeth x2 daily
moisturiser & nice smelling body lotion
reading at least 20 pages of a non fiction book (for learning/development)
write in journal- plans for day, things I'm pondering/ concerned about
exercises at home or swim
meditation
drinking 2 litres water
2 maybe 3 meals a day - focus on veg/salad & protein
taking prescribed meds (HRT etc) and supplements
message a friend/family member or connect with someone at work if I'm WFH, for the social connection

And I like bjjgirl's suggestion of lots of sex! Would be nice if we could coordinate than on a daily basis 😁

My basics are face / teeth twice a day the daily my aim is shower, 2l water (4 large glasses), 5 fruit or veg, dishes done and a wash done / hung out.

i walk the dogs every day too and try to run / go to the gym 2/3 times a week

sleep needs to improve though aswell as relaxing so working on those

Apple cider vinegar daily
2 short planking
5 superfoods in the week