Stalking Aibu?

[tortoiselover100]

Ok, so my new man keeps saying that he can't see me this weekend because he's going to xxx for work. But it's always when I might have a job for him, like I'm moving house this weekend, and now his work want him to be at Northampton all weekend. Which is mikes away from us. A few months ago, I was organising a party and was hoping he would help but work were sending him to Birmingham, again miles away.

We live separately

I'm tempted to buy a tracker so I can know if he is actually going to these places he says. Part of me thinks I shouldn't but a much bigger part of me thinks I should.

Remind me why it's so heinous, right now it feels like the right thing to do.

You sound batshit this is not normal behaviour especially less than a year into the relationship.

@tortoiselover100

Ok, so it's illegal. That's a good enough reason not to do it.

That’s the only reason you can think of?

Why don’t you actually speak to him and tell him what you’ve told us?

Hello xxx, every time something big comes up in my life where I need your help, you suddenly have to travel for work and are unable to help me. Is this just a coincidence?

If you can’t speak to him in a forthright manner then the relationship is going nowhere.

@DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult

Is he really a new man, or just some random bloke who you follow about, occasionally ask for favours, and he makes excuses nit to be near you?

😆

look, if he cares so little for you that he cannot help out than maybe you should reconsider the relationship!

Does he help out normally...chores, cooking, days out? Or is he more your FWB type?

The whole tracking thing is totally craycray though so don't go there!

Genuine question,
If you can’t trust him to tell you the truth if you ask him what’s going on why exactly are you with him?

If you trust him so little you were seriously considering putting a tracking device on his car you obviously strongly suspected he is lying to you or up to something.
If you can’t trust him why do you want to be in a relationship with him?

In your position I would cut my losses and move on, live is too short for that kind of relationship.

Aside from the tracking nonsense, regardless of whether you're "unhinged", he just sounds like a lazy git! 2/3 times I would give the benefit of the doubt without thinking much of it, but 5 times?! 5 times you've asked for small favours and he's spun you a line.... Imagine if you had kids together - "Don't forget about my performance tomorrow Daddy" "Ohh sorry I can't come, I've got to go to X"

You don't need to waste your time and money tracking him. Just get rid. He's not there to socialise or do normal day to day things with you. Go and find someone else who is. You'll tie yourself in knots trying to work out his motives for not being around. At the end of the day, he's not. Move on.