Answer the question above you. Wrong answers only.

[bearlyactive]

For example:

Q: "How do you cook an egg?"
A: "Fry it on the bonnet of your car, especially in this heat."

My question to you is...
Why do storks raise one leg?

To go to the toilet

When do zebras have stripes?

Why, not when

wHY do zebras have stripes?

To make them run faster.

How to you change a tyre ?

With wipes and a clean nappy

Why can't penguins fly?

They can’t get their passports in time.

What’s best, manual or automatic?

Automatic because it allows you to have a nap while driving.

How do you stop getting maggots in your bin?

Upload a picture of a maggot onto a Word Document, print it out and nail it to the front of the bin as a deterrent for other maggots.

WHY is it so HOT?

Aliens are shooting ray guns at our solar system

What do my daughters do with hair bands?

Too many people wished it was warm weather.

Why do books gain that old book smell?

What do my daughters do with hair bands?

Play the hair-trumpet

Why do books gain that old book smell?

Because their noses get more sensitive with age

Why does my neighbour's dog bark so much?

To replenish the outer layer of the tree in their garden.

My mattress topper claims to be 'cool in summer, warm in winter'. How does it know when the season has changed?

It checks the calendar

Who DID let the dogs out?

The cats let the dogs out.

Where is the best place to view the Perseid meteor shower?

The bathrooms section of your nearest B&Q.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

The one with the better vibrator.

How can I stop DH snoring?

Cut off his head.

When's the best time to have a baby?

After the walls are finished but before the skirting goes in.

Doctor who?

Doctor No.

How can I get grass stains out of my carpet?

Dye your carpet green

Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near?

Set fire to it.

Why does everyone hate Chris?

Because he smells of fox poo
Where can i get pinata from for my childs party ?

Clearly, the bottom of the Atlantic Trench

Who designed the beluga whale?

Someone with expensive tastes

Why are cats such arseholes?

Because they're controlled by the government.

Why is it so hot?