Answer the question above you. Wrong answers only.

[bearlyactive]

For example:

Q: "How do you cook an egg?"
A: "Fry it on the bonnet of your car, especially in this heat."

My question to you is...
Why do storks raise one leg?

[TracyBeakerSoYeah]

Because it needs a hug.

Where have all my DD's black socks gone to?

[AriesTheRam]

Because it didn't put a jumper on.

Why is the sun yellow?

[AriesTheRam]

Cross Post

[AzraiL]

Because it had its' colours done and that was its' most flattering shade.

What is gravity?

[drspouse]

It's what keeps you from getting up and doing the washing up.

Why are blackberries prickly?

[Giggorata]

They are all in appallingly bad moods.

How many roads must a man walk down?

[DirtyBlonde]

As many as the mice ask him to

Is it catching?

[Aroundtheworldin80moves]

No, it's too busy granting wishes

When is Pimss O clock?

[newtb]

Never

Why are some men dickheads?

[Pelleas]

It's always Pimms o'clock

Why can't I be a millionaire?

[cringeworthit]

Because you are already a billionaire.

How long is a piece of string?

[bearlyactive]

One hour.

What does the fox say?

[HUCKMUCK]

The fox says 'AIBU - my she fox makes a hideous noise when she is horny and the whole neighbourhood can hear her'


Why does everything my colleague says annoy the shit out of me?

[wanderings]

Because your colleague is Boris Johnson.

How do you win pin the tail on the donkey?

[drspouse]

Redefine the donkey to mean the whole room.

Why can't children put the tops back on felt tip pens?

[bearlyactive]

Because there are tiny little magnets on the lids and on the tips that repel - adults are stronger and can put them on.

Why does my cat want to sit outside during this rain?

[Whatisthisfuckery]

Because it’s thirsty.

Why do my shorts keep falling down?

[bearlyactive]

Again, magnets. Attached to the bottom of your shorts. You've obviously walked over a patch of them.

Will this thunderstorm actually clear the heat?

[wanderings]

Cat in the rain:
So there's less chance you'll try to give the cat a bath. (My cat's fur is lovely after it's dried from being rain-soaked!)

Shorts falling down
Because they're trying to cover your bare feet.

Thunderstorm
The lightning is the heat being zapped away.

What happens if you lock your children in a cage, and tell them you're acting out Hansel and Gretel?

[drspouse]

They go into nursery the next day and say to the keyworker "Mummy says you mustn't lock children in a cage".*

Will DS come home from the shop that is much too far away with an ice cream for me or will DH dissuade him from bring me a pool of melted cream?

*At least, that's what my DS did after we watched Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

[MrsRenard]

They say you are the best DM ever. You have a great relationship for ever.

Why do you get an increased sex-drive when you are menopausal ?

[SleepingStandingUp]

Why do you get an increased sex-drive when you are menopausal?
Because God wants to reward you for the down sides

[SleepingStandingUp]

Why did my husband marry me?

[Lweji]

Why did my husband marry me?

Because you're his wife.

Why is the cat scratching the door?

[sleepysleepywoofer]

The former, then you can take a swim in the pool of melted cream to cool down

Why does chilled wine taste extra nice at 16:44 on a Wednesday?