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Original poster

Tell me how lovely it is to have a second baby/DC2

19 replies

Needallthesleep · 14/02/2020 20:04

I’m almost 100% sure I’m pregnant with my second. I haven’t taken a test yet due to general craziness of life/work. This is a planned baby and I’m happy, but already panicking (as I was before I became pregnant) at how I’m going to cope.

My current DD will be two years and nine months in theory when a new baby is born.

Please please tell me the nice parts of having a second. Tell me it’s worth it to go through the sleepless nights and the breastfeeding (or attempts to) and the hair loss and the extra expense.

OP posts:

JaneyGotAGun · 14/02/2020 20:10

Watching with interest as I'm in in exactly the same boat! And although dc2 was planned I'm feeling more anxious than the first time round

Snaleandthewhail · 14/02/2020 20:13

It’s amazing.

You have the confidence this time to know that this really will pass.

You get to see your eldest in a whole new light.

You get to realise the stuff you’ve been keeping in the loft will be used again.

You’ll be that more confident doing baby stuff.

Sure there’s bad stuff (I found my third much easier than my second) but it is worth it, I promise you.

(Oh and many women find second births more straightforward...)

Original poster

Needallthesleep · 14/02/2020 20:28

@JaneyGotAGun so nice to know I’m not on my own

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Families

BathTangle · 14/02/2020 20:41

Similar age gap here: 2yrs 10 months.
Second birth was 3 hours start to finish and I was much more confident in my body's ability to do what it needed to.
DC2 is generally more chilled than DC1 and even though they took longer to sleep through I knew they'd get there in the end.
DC1 started nursery a few mornings a week shortly after DC2 was born, giving me space to have time with DC2. DC1 went to school as DC2 went to nursery.

Sitting here now with DC1 (14) and DC2 (11), who are great friends, we all about to play a game. It works really well.

Cremebrule · 14/02/2020 21:03

It can be really hard juggling and they can both tag team to drive you mad but it melts my heart to see how much my two adore each other.

Griefmonster · 14/02/2020 21:12

The first year was harder than I anticipated (massive worry I had ruined my DC1s life!) but I am very lucky that my 2 get on well (in the main - siblings know just what buttons to press and take great joy in slamming them frequently!) and I wouldn't change it for the world. 3.5 yr age gap with mine (although I don't believe age gaps are relevant and are largely uncontrollable)

justjuggling · 14/02/2020 23:59

I was much more relaxed with my second daughter and more confident. They adored each other from the start, and the best about having a second baby has been watching their relationship develop and flourish. They’re 14 & 11 now, and remain the very best of friends. That has its downsides as they gang up on me (!) but I love how they are with each other and hope they always remain close.

Sweetnessandfight · 15/02/2020 02:29

2 year 8 month gap between my two daughters (now 3 and 7 months). Very much in early stages of being a mother of two but it is so worth it.

I worried I would never love my second as much as my first - of course I do! She's the sweetest little thing and I can't imagine life without her.

Sleep is pretty shit at the moment but you forget how used to it you get.

Seeing dd2 laugh her socks off at dd1's antics is adorable.

Seeing dd1 genuinely concerned about dd2, singing to her and bringing her toys to calm her down. Lots of poking her fingers too close to her eyes and overly 'squeezy' cuddles too of course.

I am much more relaxed this time around and have far more confidence.

You will be fine. Don't panic. I did too at times but think that can also be pregnancy for you, just making you feel generally out of sorts and a bit anxious.

CormoranStrike · 15/02/2020 09:17

Very much better.

I had a better labour - as if my body knew what it was doing.

Physically I recovered faster too.

ParadiseLaundry · 15/02/2020 09:46

It's lovely, there is a whole extra person who adores them, rather than just you and your DP.

userabcname · 15/02/2020 09:48

Ah it's lovely OP. Ds1 is 2.5 and ds2 is 4mo here. I love watching them interact! And it's been nowhere near as difficult as I thought with a toddler and a newborn. You'll be absolutely fine and you'll wonder what you ever did without dc2!

Original poster

Needallthesleep · 15/02/2020 10:33

Thank you so much for your stories, I’m more excited now

OP posts:

Chipsahoy · 15/02/2020 12:52

It's the best. 0 to 1 is far harder than 1-2. Easier birth, easier to breastfeed, already in a routine and used to craziness. Baby number two just slotted right in. Baby number three on the other hand

Sunnysidegold · 15/02/2020 13:31

18 months between mine. We were trying for our second it just happened so much quicker than w

Camomila · 15/02/2020 13:44

DS1 (nearly 4) keeps thanking me for making him a baby brother, asking if he can kiss the baby, and when are they getting bunk beds please?

Plus, the baby self settles! I put him him in the crib in the living room to take DS1 to the loo or make him a sandwhich and when I come back he might be napping!

DinosApple · 15/02/2020 13:47

I knew what I was doing second time round, found it easier to stop guilting myself over BF, baby slotted in. Very cute with older sister. 17 month gap that only got tricky when DC2 was on the move too (both going in opposite directions!)

It was great and no regrets, although I too had a wtf have we done on getting the bfp .

Now they're 9 and 10 and being pita arguing, but when they aren't it's lovely.

Minai · 15/02/2020 14:19

I have an 18 month gap, dc now 2.8 and 14 months. I was worried about how it would affect ds1 being barely more than a baby himself and having to share us but it has been lovely, his brother has been such a positive addition to his life I can now see that he has gained something amazing rather than having something taken away from him. I will always be so proud of him the way he has adapted to being a big brother. And seeing them giggling together makes my heart feel like it’s going to burst. It has been so lovely for ds2 to have not only us but an older brother to entertain him. At times it has been hard dividing my attention and one of them has had to wait longer than I’d like but imho it’s quite a good thing for them to learn that you sometimes need to wait a minute. Overall it has been brilliant. You have a lot of good things to come op.

TillyTheTiger · 15/02/2020 14:29

3y4m between my two, it's amazing. DD is so chilled out, she's a million times easier than DS was at the same age, and she actually sleeps.
Her big brother is her favourite person in the world, she watches everything she does and giggles her head off when he dances or sings for her. He loves entertaining her and is so gentle and sweet with her. It makes my heart melt seeing them together.
DD will be my last baby so I'm appreciating it all so much more second time around... she's asleep on my chest right now and I'm ignoring the housework, because at some point DS had his last nap on me and I didn't know it at the time - he just grew up in a flash.

Hepsibar · 15/02/2020 14:37

Our DS (no 2) took the opp approach to life from no 1 DD. So he tended to sleep thru, where she didnt, be happy go lucky, where she was more anxious, be naughty and lazy at school where she was well behaved and dedicated and so on. Rode his bicycle at 2 instead of 5. No 2 saves money, no 1 spends.

So if you have an easy going no 1 your no 2 is likely to give you a very opposite experience and vv. Good luck and enjoy the happy and entertaining times ahead!

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