What do you think about during the minutes silence?

[NCTDN]

I mean, honestly. I stood there thinking 'what should I be thinking about? I know I'll ask mn'.
But should I actually be thinking about something specific?

It goes like this:
Well this is uncomfortable, I hope I dont sneeze/laugh/fart
Shut up and think about the soldiers
The soldiers were very brave and I am very grateful for what they did and soldiers now also have it really tough even though wars are different and not like trench warfare but then also really shit to see your friends get blown up or getting blown up yourself.
I might donate some more money as I only gave them a pound for this poppy
Oh is it over already?

For the last few years it has been "pleasedontcollapsepleasedontcollapsepleasedontcollapse"!

"If I hiss "stop stamping your feet" at DS one more time will it be more disruptive than ignoring him? I wish I'd given DD a snack before we started this, I think she's about to shout for one. Oh she's trying to run away. She's going to shout if I stop her. What's the lesser of two evils? I've had no chance of reflection here. Hope others have. Aaarrrrgggh. Oh, there's the end of it"

Today I thought "this is like a fecking dog show" (outdoor service- lots of dogs bored witless and being chastised 😢 or given treats
But I did think when I heard my surname "I can only imagine "
I also thought of the Kinks' song "some mother's son". Horrible

My Dad. He fought and survived. He died when I was in my 20s. That was 22 years ago and I take the opportunity to think about him.

The friends I have lost and concentration on maintaining a stiff upper lip (and failing, every year).

This is awkward. If I'd wanted to observe a 2 minute silence I'd have gone to a Rememberance service, but I'm actually trying to do the weekly shop.

I know we should be thinking about the soldiers who fought in the wars and feeling grateful for all we have because of that (and I am) but I can't make my brain concentrate on one thing, it goes off all over the place. So my thoughts were:

• This feels uncomfortable.
• I'm cold.
• I wonder of I'm the only one looking down and everyone is staring at me.
• I'll just check.
• Ah good they're not all looking at me.
• Aw look at that baby.
• Right, soldiers.
• I wish I didn't have to go to that meeting at work tomorrow.
• Shit, I'm dreading it.
• My shoes need a clean.
• Oh, a minute is over, that was quick.

My friends and colleagues who didn’t make it home.
Today is both a special and horrible day for me.

A mish mash really. I thought about my partner who lost his best friend. Then thought about my grandad who was in the RAF. At his funeral the last post was played, and so when that was played at the end I just bawled. I had to turn the sound off, it's unbearable

My Gradfather, who survived both The Somme & Passshendaele together with all those who didn’t come home.

They gave their lives for our freedom !!

I think about as many soldiers and wars as I can.

I think about the war poetry that has touched my heart.

I think about the many friends I have who all have their scars and who have all lost someone. Even my step brother who I dont particularly get on with, his best mate was blown up right in front of him. I think of the awful scar that must have left on him.

I think of the families who are left behind. I did a bit of charity work for Scottys Little Soldiers a while ago and I can't forget that whilst people lose their lives in war, families at home have to somehow carry on with their lives.

I think it's easy to get distracted during the 2 minutes but I do my best to keep my thoughts on those people.

I think about my grandfather who received the DCM during the first world war. He was aged 20 at the time.

I think about my uncle (who.I never knew) who was a pilot in the RAF during g the second world war, he was 19 when he died.

I think about a song that said the majority of American boys who.died in the Vietnam war were 19

And I think about how old men seem happy to send our children off to die

I think of all those young people who basically went to their deaths. It's not about politics, or whether wars ever ok. I just think of all those lives taken and affected for what they believed was the greater good.
I was in primark today during 2minutes silence. Most shoppers stopped on the spot to observe it. except one particularly loud couple, chatting away. I'm assuming it was a language barrier and they didn't know at first, eventually they whispered instead.

The ironing. I was at home and unaware of it, and we don't really observe it.

My late dad who was in the Second World War from just 18 and landed on the Normandy beaches. He was just a boy really and saw some terrible things.

My Dad. He was in Burma, got caught in an explosion, just survived it and finally got home a year later addicted to Morphine. The internal damage just fucked his insides up enough to make the infection that killed him 36 years later hard to diagnose. I was 12.

He was largely grim and quiet on the subject. I think about him a lot in general, but always during the silence.

I had it lucky when I served

I'm so thankful and grateful for the people who gave their lives to try and make things better for us.

My grandfather who survived and all the young men who didn’t

It's a mix of awkwardness and emotion for me. I think it's a very powerful moment, but completely awkward at the same time with lots of random thoughts popping into your head along with thoughts about respecting the soldiers who have given their lives.

I think about all the lives lost, all the pain and the suffering and just concentrate really hard on not crying.

I have tears in my eyes thinking of all the men and women that lost their lives.
I have many times took the two minutes silence and ignored customers/people who want my attention.

I mentally played out the telling off I would be giving my kids if they couldn't be bloody silent for one minute. They stayed quiet, and my lecture goes into the memory bank for another day.

This morning I thought about all the Syrian refugee children we have at the school I work at, naming them all in my head and marvelling at their strength and ability to come to school and just be normal after everything they've seen and been through.

I hoped they'd all be okay when we have a fire drill this week (last year one of them hid under a table sobbing "The planes are coming!" when the fire bell went off).

Last week we had an assembly about war where they were shown a picture of a Syrian city before the war and now. One little girl put her hand up and said, "that looks like my country, Kurdistan."

Usually I think about why I am here doing this act of remembrance, often that leads me to DH. We have both served and he has combat PTSD.

Often it is as sockittome123 said above. Please don’t fidget/faint/grimace/gurn or ohmigod my feet/shoulder/knees hurt and I need to move.