I'm a volunteer for the Samaritans - AMA

[themagicmonkey]

There's quite a few threads about the Samaritans on MN, so I wondered if this would be helpful (I won't share details of individual callers obviously). To begin with a few thoughts...

If you're thinking of calling

• Everyone who answers the phone is a volunteer member of the public. My joining group was made up of all sorts of ages, backgrounds and professions. Sometimes as a caller you won't click with the person you're speaking to, as happens in life, and you can end the call to try again if you feel able to.
• It's a listening service. I know it's trailed all over the place, but we don't give solutions or answers (nor should we, we're not experts). It shouldn't be a replacement for a 24/7 NHS mental health crisis service, but it is and that needs to change. Being actively listened to helps a lot of people - I know that because callers often tell me they feel much better after a 30 minute call.
• It's not just for people who are suicidal or in significant distress, but for anyone who needs to talk things through. Volunteers are trained to gently bring calls to an end in a respectful way, if the call seems to have reached its end or the waiting times are long.
• We know nothing about you apart from what you choose to share, including phone number and where you are. Calls are taken through an app and you're routed to the next available listener anywhere in the country.
• Overnight is the busiest time, when more people are calling with more difficult issues, and there are many fewer volunteers answering calls. I think waiting times are dropping due to more co-ordination around rotas, but sorry if you have to wait - no Sam wants that to happen if you're in distress. If you can call at other times you'll probably have a shorter wait and the volunteer may have more time to talk.

If you're thinking of becoming a Sams volunteer

• Do it! It's a real privilege and I've got a lot from it, I wish I'd done it sooner.
• You can hang up on abusive/sexual callers. Eventually they get blocked and anecdotally the numbers of wankers seem to be dropping as the blocking gets better.
• The training is great, as is the support. There are multiple layers of other volunteers to debrief and discuss things with - for the first six months you debrief all shifts on the phone to an experienced listener. Everyone is friendly and supportive.
• You may have to be on the phone with somebody who's chosen to end their life. Sam's stance is that people's decisions (unless it will harm others, especially children/vulnerable adults) have to be respected, although of course we will ask if they want us to call an ambulance. Sometimes people will be in agony from chronic illness. It happens rarely and most calls are not as distressing - many are enjoyable and some calls are very funny! I've learnt a lot talking to people about their life, studies, hobbies etc.
• You'll be asked to commit to a small amount of overnight shifts each year, normally 2/3 hours, when there's the most need. There's a lot of flexibility (you rota yourself at my branch) and it is definitely worth discussing your own circumstances with your local branch, all branches operate in different ways and are open at different times. Lots of people manage to combine being a Sam with fulltime work/kids etc, and everyone does their annual shift quota in different ways.

No questions but wanted to say thank you for
volunteering and providing valuable support to people in need.

.

This is really interesting work you are doing. Well done you for volunteering!
If someone is under the age of 18 or is a vulnerable person, what do you do then?

You still can't do anything without details, but there are internal processes for specialists to make safeguarding decisions instead of the listener. The listener would also encourage the under-18/vulnerable adult to seek help themselves as appropriate, and be clear that Samaritans are concerned for their wellbeing. But it goes back to the anonymity and inability to do anything without identifying details.

Thank you for doing this. I know someone who has made extensive use of the Samaritans and found it really, really helpful.

Me too OP. I wonder if we know each other 😊

Why have Samaritans stopped the email service,?? I find it easier to write down how I am feeling than try and explain over the phone.
I really do appreciate the service, have used it numerous times.
Thank you op 🙏💐🥰

You can do web chat if you prefer to write rather than speak.

@FreshInky thank you did not know about this option

Thank you for being a volunteer. I know i owe my life to the Samaritans.

I was a volunteer a number of years ago. (Around 2005) It was predominantly calls back then. With occasional emails and face to face. This was before texting.
i would say at least 50% of calls were hang ups. There was also a lot of sex pest calls. People calling because they were lonely. The number of suicidal people was actually pretty small. I worked there two years and had 1 active suicide in that time.

I just wondered how things have changed is it very different now or fairly similar?

Very interesting thread and thank you for what you do.

It’s very similar now. I have been doing it for quite a few years and most callers are not actively suicidal. It’s really good that people call before they get to that stage.

The misuse of service calls are the hardest. It’s rare that I have none on a shift. Unfortunately, there are some shifts where the majority have been sex calls and then I go home and wonder why I am doing it. There is a lot of support from other branch members though, and I put up with the sex calls because of the people out there who genuinely need our support. I do it for them.

Apologies OP, I don’t mean to highjack your thread. I think you previously said you’re new to the Samaritans, whereas I’ve been doing it for quite some time. We probably have different perspectives.

I have a question for you, OP. What do you think of the planned operational changes that have been announced?

I hate to use the obvious get out but I haven't engaged that much with it. I guess I feel that the amount of my bandwidth which I can dedicate to Sams is taken up with the listening volunteering! I can definitely see how hard it would be to see your branch close, especially if it's a remote town (which it seems like most of the first closures are). I'm in London so there are plenty of branches within reach of me. On the other hand I can also see that maybe we need more resilience overnights and more collective rotaring even if we don't close branches.

...well what would you like to ask yourself?

My AMA is connected to the fact that the only person I know who has told me they’re a counsellor is someone who had experienced a family suicide bereavement. Is the volunteer corps made up of mainly people who’ve been through trauma themselves, and if you think there’s a strong ‘I’ve walked on your shoes’ experience? Conscious I may in fact know others who haven’t declared their involvement, unbeknownst to me, but I’m wondering if it leans towards lived experience?

Do you ever judge people who ring and you think their problems aren’t very big? I ask because I thought about ringing last night due to my anxiety which was overwhelming me but I thought that maybe my problems aren’t serious enough.

As a Samaritan myself , no I don’t judge any caller . Everyone is an individual and what might seem a small issue to one person may be completely overwhelming to another and if something is causing them anxiety their feelings are valid as that’s how they feel. As the others have said we are a listening service and often giving someone the opportunity to hear themselves talk through their issues out loud can be very helpful to them.

Thank you.

I was a Samaritan about 13 years ago for a few years and I agree with this. I remember feeling that such a seemingly simple fact as just quietly listening to someone speak themselves back to a balanced state gave me a good feeling of job satisfaction.

@garlictwist Don't hesitate to ring. We need you to block the path of the inappropriate callers. (Their prevalence was partly why I stopped.)

Everybody's problems are of equal importance when you're in a distressed state of mind. I'm sorry you're struggling and I hope you'll call.

I volunteered for a similar organisation and our code of conduct would have prevented me engaging in a forum like this. Are you sure this is what the organisation would support?

I don't know the inner depths of fellow volunteers but I don't have this background. The vital skills are listening and being non-judgemental, not lived experience (because I don't want my experience of an event shaping my response to what you're experiencing). There have been a few posts on here suggesting that younger people shouldn't volunteer, which I disagree with. Some of the best Sams I've volunteered with are in their 20s. It basically comes back to us not giving advice, but listening carefully and responding to what you say.

I don't think so, as I'm not sharing any personal details or details of what people tell us. There are quite a few misconceptions about Sams on here which may put people off calling at a time we might be able to help.