I'm a recovering anorexic, AMA

[SummerMonday]

I have noticed that a lot of studies, films, books, etc. focus on people developing anorexia. You rarely read or see about people who've had anorexia and are in recovery (unless it's a magic recovery at the end of a book or something). I will do my best to be really honest in answering any questions.

What types of help and treatment (whether therapy or anything else) supported you in getting to where you are now in recovery? Thanks.

How old were you when you first developed anorexia, and (assuming you were a teenager) what's the one thing you wish your parents had done differently?

Well done OP for getting to recovery.

Hi OP. How 'recovered' do you consider yourself? Do you still think about food in a disordered way but are able to control your behaviour? Or has your outlook changed to the point you think about food and your body reasonably 'normally'?

what do you think of the availability of weight loss injections & how easy it is for people who don't need them to get them?

I think it's way too easy for people to get hold of them and I'd like to see much more rigorous medical restriction on them in the private sector. I feel like the issue is that they could tip people into an ED, rather than the risk they'd be a go-to for people who had a pre-existing ED. When I was really in the grip of mine, starving myself was like an addiction and I didn't need any extra tools to facilitate it.

Actually, none. I realised that I was really far into it and I managed to change it by myself. But it took a lot of effort and quite a long time.

I was 19, in my second year at uni. This probably made it a lot easier to hide from my family, but they were definitely aware I had an issue. In hindsight, I wish they'd confronted me over it more, but I am not sure how receptive I would have been.

I consider myself mostly, but not fully, recovered. The temptation to slip back is still there, especially in times of stress. I think it might be like alcoholism of any addiction - it never 100% goes away.

Do you think about the possibility of relapse in the future?

What do you think would have helped you not to develop anorexia, or do you think it was inevitable for you?

I very much disagree with you about restricting access to GLP1s further in the private sector, but I am coming at this from a very different point of view and starting position. I can see how you feel that they are dangerous for people with your condition, but that is a very separate issue which doesn't mean that people who legitimately can access them should be prevented from doing so or have onerous barriers put in their way.

@SummerMonday well done for all your efforts.

Are you neurodivergent? I don’t mean to cause any offence, am a parent to ND child and aware there is more discussion around anorexia being more common in those with autism. Thanks.

What was the realisation or factor that made you change and start to recover?

I don't think I will relapse now, but sometimes I can feel myself slipping and I have to be careful at those points.

I honestly don't really know why I developed an ED but I think it was a poor coping strategy at a time when I felt under pressure. It was an easy thing to control and it made me feel as though I was in control of everything else too.

Not that I know or has ever been suggested.

Honestly, it sounds weird, but I just sort of realised one day that it was too much and I couldn't fully focus on anything else. My periods had stopped and I knew I looked awful. I wanted to be normal, but I didn't want to stop at the same time. It was like a kind of battle of will.

Congratulations on your fantastic achievement and bravery. You should be rightly proud!

No question OP but I just wanted to say I’m glad you’ve (mostly recovered). There’s an older lady at my gym that clearly has some issue with an ED or body dysmorphia, she’s absolute skin and bone and spends HOURS walking on a treadmill or just walking up and down in the pool. I feel sad every time I see her that she’s either never had help, or that help hasn’t worked for her.

You are amazing op.

It takes tremendous willpower to overcome that sort of disorder.

Tell yourself that every day.

I have lost friends to anorexia, and I get really upset by the flippant way people flap on about BMI on here. Honestly, not being in the grip of what you have been through is so much more important than panic if a bmi pops above 25. But it's like a religion for some, and they don't realise the damage they can do by feeling it is ok to talk so disparagingly about bodies and to make such a virtue of low bodyweight.

I think you are right that issues of control play a huge part, but making thinness an achievement is catnip for certain perfectionist personality types looking for control in a world of chaos.

Ironically, not eating is far easier than overcoming, so you have honestly been incredible.

A therapist mentioned that anorexia often manifests if there is a lack of love. Did you feel loved?