DS’ school collecting money for Stonewall: how to respond?

CoolforKats But please by all means go full steam right ahead & wave that authoritarian freak flag proudly

A flag? there's an 'Authoritarian Freak Flag'? Who knew?

But yeah, I mean, why shouldn't authoritarian freaks have their own flag, everybody else has.
I wonder what month is it flown over my local town hall?

Most of the first page of the thread are rants rather than substance so I'm not going to waste my time. That you can't quantify in a few sentences what the problem is speaks volumes.

You obviously aren't reading all of the recent posts on this thread, including my own at 10.12. In a nutshell, Diversity Role Models have, in the recent past (2020 and 2024), been very "suspect."

If you're actually interested, you can read the following (which was in my post at 10.12):

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womensrights/5537528-diversity-role-models-and-stonewall-coming-soon-to-a-school-near-you-june-2026-announcement?page=1

If you're not interested, don't care, or can't be bothered, then please don't lecture the rest of us on charitable "values."

ps. I actually think that Diversity Role Models might be a perfect representation of Stonewall's values as a charity!

Why do you consider Diversity Role Models not to be a good expression of Stonewall's values?

@CoolforKats

whether a charity's values should exclude them from school fund raising.

My thoughts exactly, hence my post about Stonewall's recent announcement of its partnership with Diversity Role Models.

I wonder what goes on behind the scenes when the leaders at Stonewall think this is a good expression of their "values."

And why they think anyone of us should be supporting them through charitable giving at a secondary school.

What a silly false comparison. The context here isn't problematic conditions attached to fund raising that obviously shouldn't be approved but whether a charity's values should exclude them from school fund raising.

My children’s high school took the approach that it was a voluntary donation. Probably because the catchment area included very low income families.

So do you think I should not have written to my children’s school about my concerns with their Xmas box collection?

The boxes were for children in refugee camps, a very worthwhile cause I’m sure we’d all agree.

Apart from the fact that the Christian charity was adding religious materials to the boxes and excluding children who didn’t attend their “bible” classes. Essentially using the boxes for proselytising.

I’m pleased to say the following year the school teamed up with a local organisation who gave gift boxes to children in hospitals, hospices, in care or living in poverty.

But perhaps I should have kept quiet, made my children feel bad every year because they weren’t joining in despite the regular encouragement from the school.

To be fair, I was quite vocal in the playground as to why we were not donating that first year so I suspect i was not the only one to contact the school.

I can't remember what I said in an email to my DD"s
single-sex (!) school when they chose Stonewall as a charity, but they did rapidly backtrack and choose another charity instead. I suspect I wasn't the only parent who emailed.

I think I'd just ask if the school was happy to support a charity that said same-sex attraction was akin to racism.

There will be same-sex attracted (aka homosexual) people at the school who might find it hard to speak out if they're being assumed to be 'racists'.

And it’s happening during Pride month.

A lot of them are rife with corruption.

Which is why schools would be much better off to do school related fundraising. How about school lunches for kids in need? Library books,?

Because of a very motivated activist teacher, most likely.

There’s such an ethical issue with these fundraiser non-uniform days, no matter what the charity.

Peer pressure, visibility of kids whose parents can’t or won’t contribute.

Charitable giving shouldn’t be like this

This seems an appropriate place to remind posters/parents of the current workings of Stonewall and their partners:

Coming soon to a school near you
Firstly, their newly-announced partnership (June 2026) with the (formerly very controversial) Diversity Role Models (see MN thread

Diversity Role Models and Stonewall: coming soon to a school near you (June 2026 announcement) | Mumsnet

and background to them (from 2024 and 2020 -some of this information may be very upsetting!)

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/5036673-diversity-role-models-charity

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womensrights/3943889-Asda-partners-with-Diversity-Role-Models-and-gets-angry-response-to-love-has-no-age-limit-message-Edited-by-MNHQ-at-OPS-REQUEST?utm_campaign=thread&utmmedium=appshare

It's going to be something to watch out for, especially with the new RSHE from September 2026. Anyone with school-age children especially, be aware of this. OP, this is the kind of partnership that Stonewall is endorsing, with an organization that has a very dodgy past.

and secondly

Stonewall's new Proud Employers scheme (replacing Stonewall Champions Workplace Equality Index from 2025)

'Educate, motivate, and inspire lawmakers' - Stonewall's New 'Proud Employers' scheme and strategy | Mumsnet

I will update both threads as I find new information.

Sounds like all the parents weren't consulted though with this choice. That's what I love about TRAs. It's hard to impress people these days, but the TRA ability for hypocrisy is genuinely impressive!

You could simply say parents have a range of views on which charities they are happy to support, and suggest donations to the PTA should always be available as an alternative.

Of course The Labour Party are on that list, but it's interesting that the Lib Dems aren't. Look at all those NHS trusts and universities though

This is also why I have an additional generic no name email address so I can raise concerns without it directly being associated with my child's surname or the email they have on file for communications.

Definitely raise your concerns.

Given that government departments and the BBC left Stonewall's scheme due to impartiality concerns, I fail to see why schools who are also supposed to be impartial are still thinking they are an appropriate charity for whole school donation days.

It almost feels like the school is doing a two fingered salute at that and being belligerent in a teenage way. Which is all kinds of not ok.

This.

@NinetyNineRedBalloonsGoByAgain, both Transgender Trend and Safe Schools Alliance have resources for parents who want to raise the issue of a school’s relationship with Stonewall.

Your thread is being derailed by CoolforKats but you are completely right about this, stand firm and send the email.

@SingleSexSpacesInSchools nice one

Cool is misrepresenting.
The OP is merely informing the HT of concerns and asking for a change. She is not deciding for other parents, the HT has the decision.

Why doesn't she just let the parents decide for themselves if they want to abstain?

She want's to pressure the school into not even giving them a choice.

Also I note Cool has not responded to the fact that Stonewall's guidance to schools is incorrect in law.

As is the Catholic church's but that's got buggar all to do with whether their charity is worth giving to.

You could simply point out that Stonewall has suffered from serious mission drift given that LGB people are completely equal to everyone now, and have in fact lost the support of mainstream lesbian and gay organisations by only focusing on "trans" issues, which are completely different and have not been respectful towards women and girls, in spite of laws that protect women's same sex spaces.