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Original poster

Gender neutral names

238 replies

dustysidetable · 19/10/2026 18:45

My husband is insistent on a gender neutral name for our twins, I’m happy with it in principle and there’s so many gender neutral boys names I love but I’m really struggling for girls!. The only one I like is Shelby but he doesn’t like it at all. My favourite girls name is Sylvia but obviously that isn’t gender neutral, I like soft sounding names and not a fan of the nick names like Stevie, Bobby, Riley etc. Any ideas?

OP posts:
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ToKittyornottoKitty · 19/10/2026 20:06

HugoThatway · 19/10/2026 20:05

Christina and Patricia - Chris and Pat.
Alexandra and Daniela

Edited

Neither of those are gender neutral

frenchnoodle · 19/10/2026 20:07

My son is Florin

TeenToTwenties · 19/10/2026 20:07

ToKittyornottoKitty · 19/10/2026 20:06

Neither of those are gender neutral

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But they have gender neutral abbreviations. Win win.

HugoThatway · 19/10/2026 20:08

ToKittyornottoKitty · 19/10/2026 20:06

Neither of those are gender neutral

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Alex and Danny and Chris and Pat are.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 19/10/2026 20:08

TeenToTwenties · 19/10/2026 20:07

But they have gender neutral abbreviations. Win win.

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Disagree, if she has boys then she’s just giving her sons girls names and opening them up to a lifetime of bullying.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 19/10/2026 20:08

HugoThatway · 19/10/2026 20:08

Alex and Danny and Chris and Pat are.

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Those are nik names, not actual names.

Original poster
dustysidetable · 19/10/2026 20:09

Thank you for everyone who’s been so kind. I think I’m going to make a short list and see how I feel when the babies get here. I’m very pregnant and very emotional so keep getting so stressed!

OP posts:
MerryAquaKoala · 19/10/2026 20:09

Why would you give a girl a 'gender neutral' name? It's so brilliant being a girl, give her a girls' name :)

Boys I know with truly gender neutral names, don't seem to appreciate it.

HugoThatway · 19/10/2026 20:10

ToKittyornottoKitty · 19/10/2026 20:08

Those are nik names, not actual names.

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They're diminutives not 'nik names'

ToKittyornottoKitty · 19/10/2026 20:10

HugoThatway · 19/10/2026 20:10

They're diminutives not 'nik names'

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Calling your son Christina, would be giving him a girls name.

HugoThatway · 19/10/2026 20:10

Dominique and Camille

schopenhauer · 19/10/2026 20:11

Exactly, you’re the one who is pregnant (and with twins!!!) so I don’t think he should be dictating this to you. Don’t let him choose for you, you should have more say and just because he has decided gender neutral is a good thing, it doesn’t mean you have to go with it!!!

TeenToTwenties · 19/10/2026 20:11

ToKittyornottoKitty · 19/10/2026 20:08

Disagree, if she has boys then she’s just giving her sons girls names and opening them up to a lifetime of bullying.

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Obviously you don't give boys those, you give the male equivalent. Christopher, Patrick, Daniel etc.
But they shorten to the same abbreviation.

So if they want to not advertise their sex, they can use the abbreviation.

NimbleTaupeTiger · 19/10/2026 20:11

EmeraldSlippers · 19/10/2026 18:57

Probably not what you're looking for because it's not a fashionable name at the moment, but I recently read the book Shirley by Charlotte Bronte and found out that Shirley used to be a boy's name. (Well really a surname that was sometimes used for boys). The female character called Shirley in the book had parents who wanted a boy, so gave her a boy's name.
The book was so popular that it inspired lots of female babies to be called Shirley, and ever since it's been known as a girl's name.

The wrestler Big Daddy was actually called Shirley Crabtree.

ChocoChocoLatte · 19/10/2026 20:12

Ellis

ToKittyornottoKitty · 19/10/2026 20:13

TeenToTwenties · 19/10/2026 20:11

Obviously you don't give boys those, you give the male equivalent. Christopher, Patrick, Daniel etc.
But they shorten to the same abbreviation.

So if they want to not advertise their sex, they can use the abbreviation.

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It’s not ‘obviously’ because that’s not what the poster said. And OP is looking for gender neutral names, not gender neutral abbreviations

Duckies · 19/10/2026 20:14

What exactly are his reasons, which you agree with?

In reality, their sex will be even more of a focus as you have to constantly answer questions about if they are girls or boys, and this will continue into their adult and work life.

Sylvia is great, and sounds like a woman who won't take any shit (if that's what you're hoping to achieve with the unisex name experiment).

roshi42 · 19/10/2026 20:17

Hollis? Or Ellis?

MyDucksAreHavingAParty · 19/10/2026 20:19

If you have one of each then you could call them Evelyn and Evelyn, like Evelyn Waugh and his wife Evelyn.

Or Taylor and Taylor á la Taylor Lautner and his wife. Although that's pronounced the same way for boys and girls so wouldn't work the same way.

Original poster
dustysidetable · 19/10/2026 20:20

MyDucksAreHavingAParty · 19/10/2026 20:19

If you have one of each then you could call them Evelyn and Evelyn, like Evelyn Waugh and his wife Evelyn.

Or Taylor and Taylor á la Taylor Lautner and his wife. Although that's pronounced the same way for boys and girls so wouldn't work the same way.

That would make life a lot easier!

OP posts:
HugoThatway · 19/10/2026 20:21

ToKittyornottoKitty · 19/10/2026 20:13

It’s not ‘obviously’ because that’s not what the poster said. And OP is looking for gender neutral names, not gender neutral abbreviations

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It's a compromise, which may suit the brief.
I don't know why you feel so strongly about it.

mtobrokeme · 19/10/2026 20:23

I’d have Billy & Jesse

HugoThatway · 19/10/2026 20:23

@dustysidetable , would your DH want gender neutral names if they were two boys?

ToKittyornottoKitty · 19/10/2026 20:24

HugoThatway · 19/10/2026 20:21

It's a compromise, which may suit the brief.
I don't know why you feel so strongly about it.

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I think giving a boy an obvious girls name is stupid, pretty simple really. Also opens up the kid to a lifetime of mockery. Why not give a boy a boys name with neutral abbreviation?

11plusherewego · 19/10/2026 20:25

I really don’t know why you’re bothering before the babies are here.

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