Previous thread. https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/world-cup-2026/5553352-fifa-world-cup-2026-discussion-and-watchalong-thread-part-6?page=8&reply=153551255

Let the conversation continue.

I just can't believe this is happening again.

Some of you may remember the show called "my big fat gypsy wedding" on channel 4 from years ago. It did absolutely awful damage to my community (Romany gypsy). It was complete and utter trash and majority of those featured weren't even gypsies.

Well they're at it again.

They are advertising a new show, something along the lines of "secret lives of gypsy wives". Yet the star of the show is a social media influencer (?) named Trewly Precious who is neither of those things. I think her father was a gypsy but she wasn't raised in the community and she isn't married.

Why are they doing this to us? There are so many amazing gypsy women who could have shown what it's really like to be a modern day gypsy. Yet they have once again chosen entertainment value over the reputation of a community who are already marginalised and hated by a large portion of the public. AIBU to be so angry about this?

That sounds horrible but hear me out. DH is disabled. It’s fairly recent and we’re all still adjusting I dare say.

Work has adjusted to him working from home permanently. Because of his disability he has to sit in a specially adapted chair. There’s no room for it in any of the bedrooms upstairs so he’s in the lounge.

Since he’s sleeping badly at night he is working when he can. He was working until 8 o clock last night. We have young children and I am sick to death of having a husband who is there in all but name.

I know there’s no easy answers. I’m just sharing because it’s so difficult to talk about in RL without sounding an arse but truth is I’m sick of the sight of him!

Not seen anyone wear them on holiday this year

On a much needed holiday nice resort booked a suite that has swim up pool to the 6 adjoining rooms. This is on a huge resort with 4 big pools this is a separate small pool just for these rooms but it’s perfect for us as our youngest is a nervous swimmer.
on Monday there were a few kids climbing over the wall we were on our balcony not using pool but could see this playing out. They all jumped in the pool, joined by 6 adults drinks in hand climbing over wall also (it’s a tiny wall to denote separation a foot or two high)
anyways someone in the downstairs room called reception someone came along to tell the 6 adults and 8 kids this is for these rooms only but you can stay an hour.
yest we were in the pool and they all rocked up again this time trying to take our sunbeds saying could we use these as your in pool as their numberous children starting jumping into pool. It was chaos, got dc out out and said to one of the women who could speak English - this pool is just a small pool for these few rooms only to which she said I’m staying in that one (pointed to a room she could or could not be staying in I haven’t seen anyone coming or going so not sure?!))
anyways I said well these rooms sleep four so the rest of these people aren’t staying here she was aggressive as were the rest and said it’s not up to you I paid for my room these are my guests. I said that’s not how it works this is rude a couple I wouldn’t mind but that many kids and adults just force’s everybody else who actually has a room there out.
didn’t call reception as dc were worried it would kick off if we saw them again but I’m pissed off so would it be unreasonable that If this large group do the same again today and the hotel won’t sort them out I arrange for all my guests (me gathering up everyone I’ve spoke to at the hotel to congregate here so there’s no room for the cheeky fuckers?! Or I’m open to other suggestions I’m not above tell youngest to dirty protest in the pool if needed 😂

I Have been with my partner for 3 years and he has a 6 yr old who he co-shares. We live together in my house with my 15 year old son. My stepsons mum doesn’t seem interested at times in having her child so we pick up most weekends, any doctors appointments, football practice during the week and for weeks when she goes on holiday or needs a break. I feel like my OH never gives me a say in this though and I’m just told about it when the plans have already been made. Am I wrong for feeling annoyed or dismissed? I always get accused of not wanting him around, but when we originally got together it was close to their breakup and she denied him access to his child for months. I don’t want to seem like the wicked stepmom but at the same time, I have already raised my son and am happy building my career now that I can.

Yes or no?

I dont even know where to start but I took my youngest to soft play today, my older boys were at school and I thought it would be nice to have an hour just me and him but we ended up leaving after 20 minutes because he attacked a little boy

When I say attacked I don’t mean a squabble over a toy. He barged him over and then climbed on top of him and was hitting him before I got there. The other little boy was crying and his mum was understandably furious with me. She kept saying “get him off” as though I wasn’t already trying, I apologised over and over and did offer to pay for a new drink for the little boy as it had done everywhere but they weren’t interested. Another parent was saying I shouldn’t bring a child like that to soft play

He’s only just turned 3 but everyone thinks he’s older because he’s so tall, he’s built like a 5 year old so people expect him to behave like one too which doesn’t help as mentally he’s still only 3. But when he loses it he’s so strong it isn’t just a tantrum where you can pick him up and take him away. He kicks, headbutts and lashes out

I’ve tried all the obvious things. I don’t smack or shout all the time. He has routines, he sleeps fairly well most nights but usually in with me. He eats alright apart from vegetables. I’ve read books, watched videos, spoke to nursery when he was there, spoken to health visitor, tried reward charts which did nothing.

His nursery asked him to leave about 6 weeks ago. They said they couldn’t keep everyone safe anymore and they didn’t have enough staff to give him the support he needed. There had been biting, pushing and one incident where he threw a wooden block . They said they were sorry but thought another setting would be better suited

I can’t find anywhere else it’s either full or has waiting lists. A couple have asked why he’s left his previous nursery and when I’m honest I hear nothing back. It’s meant I can’t work as there’s no one to have him. Their mum died 2 years ago

And I’m trying to keep things normal for them but every month something goes wrong. there’s no family that could help, my parents are gone and my wife’s parents live hours away and aren’t well enough to have an energetic 3 year old

I’ve spoken to the GP, we’ve been referred for assessments and everyone agrees he needs looking at but there’s waiting lists and I’m just trying to make sure he doesn’t hurt anyone else or himself which didn’t work today

People assume because he’s badly behaved I’m useless and maybe I am I don’t know anymore. I’m exhausted all the time and always watching him and then feel guilty as the older boys need my attention too

Today at soft play he was laughing and climbing like any other child and then another boy ran past him and he just launched himself at him.

Afterwards he cried and cuddled into me whilst I was carrying him out and he kept asking if I was cross and I said yes I was.

I just sat there thinking is this it now? Do I just stop taking him places because it isn’t fair on other children? But then it’s not fair on his brothers to not go anywhere as it’s nearly the summer holidays and how does he ever learn?

Maybe grief has affected him more than I realised because he was young so he didn’t really understand compared to my older boys. Maybe I’ve made mistakes or been too soft or maybe I’ve been too strict because I’m worried about his behaviour

I just feel completely stuck

I've been on holiday for 2 days. I hate where I am (European city).

A lot of issues.
I can't find any good places to eat in a walkable distance.
My hotel is pretty grotty (not dirty, just old).
Hotel in a dodgy area and I don't feel safe going outside early morn or into the evening.
Weather is temperamental.
The city is grotty and definitely not one I like.

I've talked to holiday provider about at least moving hotels but they've refused. I've spoken to 2 different people.

Do I just give this up as a bad job, lose about £1500 and get a flight home? I can't afford another holiday anytime soon.

I'm not much of a crier but I cried tonight. I've travelled alone before so I'm usually a very confident traveller.

Of Lidl cottage cheese for my tea? I've also got half a bag of raddishes and a big chunk of cucumber.

DH says I'm minging. I say it's delicious. We go on holiday in a couple of days and it needs using

Looking for some opinions on these GCSEs…..not enough academics?

triple science
English lit
english lang
maths
art
photography
music

Let the games continue…….

Help me with my life dilemma.

DH and I have been together for 15 years, we are late 30s with 2 kids at primary school. I work in a stressful job in the City, requiring extremely long hours (60-70hr weeks, weekend work most weekends and most holidays too). DH is in a creative career - his passion. I earn c.6x what he does. He is self-employed so does more with the kids and more around the house (I’d say he does 60% of the childcare and maybe 70% of household tasks).

I nearly died earlier this year with a ruptured appendix that was missed and negligent medical care. It came off the back of a period of very intense work - about 9 months of hell. I’m mentally traumatised from that experience and burnt out generally, and the whole thing has made me reassess my life.

Ive suddenly got clarity that I don’t want to continue doing my job anymore and I don’t even know what I’m doing it for as London is so expensive our quality of life is not great. We have enough equity in our small London terraced house that we could move back to my home town (up north) and buy somewhere large and detached and lovely mortgage free, near much better schools for the kids and near my family. DH really doesn’t want to leave London as he loves it, and his work is here (his family is up north too but nowhere near mine). He would want to continue commuting to London if we moved, which would probably involve overnight stays and impact family life.

Im starting to feel a bit of resentment as I increasingly feel like I’m killing myself and sacrificing my quality of life so that DH can live his dreams. But I love him, am proud of what he does, and would feel awful to effectively force him to move (which we would need to do if I quit my job, as he could never pay the mortgage alone). I knew when we got married that this would be his career. I’ve thought of middle grounds like downsizing in London or moving to a commuter area if I took a pay cut, but that would feel like a much worse outcome for the kids, to leave everything they know for something materially worse, and/or both parents travelling more than we do now . I don’t know whether I’m being unfair in wanting to do this or not, or what the right balance is, so thoughts from other people would be welcome!

Since I had my daughter in 2023 my health has declined rapidly.
my weight as steadily gone up to 14 stone (I’m 5 ft 3), my hair is thinning, I’ve been diagnosed wit adenomyosis, pelvic congestion syndrome, chronic tonsiltiis, I’m awaiting a tonsillectomy and a hysterectomy. That’s just the back story. I am waiting to see endocrinology in August and the lymphedema nurses for my leg swelling.
when my daughter was about 1, I rapidly lost 2 stone and was very poorly, my gp thought I had cancer. I had so many tests and nothing was ever found. Then I just started piling the weight on. I’ve tried EVERYTHING. I am so so active and have a very healthy diet. But my weight won’t stop increasing. I absolutely eat in a calorie deficit. I know it is something medical related but does anyone have any insight on what this could be? Up to now for my various symptoms I have seen 2 gastro doctors, vascular as my legs are very swollen, rheumatology as I had gout symptoms but it was arthritis, haematology for constant infections, weight loss in the beginning and swollen lymph nodes and ent for my tonsils. I also saw cardiology as I was having chest pain and shortness of breath. Everything from these doctors have been okay.
I am at breaking point

Thinking about booking a solo holiday. I am a divorced 59 year old woman. Very active and sociable and am confident in travelling and life in general. I work full time. Live in London.
I live with my adult children and have zero interest in a new relationship.

Want to book a trip to ‘somewhere’ in September to celebrate my 60th. Thinking culture and history and beautiful landscapes and great food. So have decided Italy might work. Tuscany/Florence area.

As I want to explore the area and only have a week it might be useful to go on an organised tour. So the logistics and travel are handled and the itinerary organised in a logical way.

Might be nice to have some company for some of the trip such as mealtimes and then have my own room to retreat to and free time to fill how I want.
Am a bit unsure about the organised aspect of it though. I have always travelled independently before or with friend or family. I have visions of being herded by a tour guide and the time being over controlled.

Was almost ready to book when I saw on a review that a guide might meet me at Heathrow to help with the journey. Really don’t need that level of support! I know people are all different and it might just be an option for more anxious or disabled people.

I would also need to pick from a very limited range of options as the tour groups obviously have a few departure dates. In fact I can only find one option for the date and region I want. It’s around £2300 for one week Heathrow to Pisa. That is fine but I could obviously do it more cheaply and flexibly myself.

Anyway. Thoughts on how to travel solo as an independent person but with some elements of an organised tour? There will be local companies offering day trips and excursions but less likely to have company at mealtimes and get to know people.

The G adventure type places seem to run much younger and I don’t want to be 40 years older than everyone else!

It's a MIL one.

DH turns 50 next week, MIL has messaged me to ask me to choose, schedule, book and pay for an experience gift for him, she doesn't mind what it is up to a certain budget. I'm working full time and work is absolutely manic, I haven't even sorted out what I am getting him (for complicated reasons I am conflicted about getting him anything at all), so aibu for thinking that as she has been retired for 20 years she has time to sort this out herself?

I am in my early 50s and look after myself pretty well. I love style and fashion. I don’t do any cosmetic procedures but I have Brazilian keratin in my hair, epilate my legs etc.

I have recently wondered about armpits. They are in fairly good condition. I am Asian so they are perhaps a little darker than the rest of my skin but that’s fine.

Should I be doing anything? Do my armpits deserve some love? Does anybody engage in armpit maintenance? Moisturise them? Exfoliate? This is not an aesthetic thing. I never wear sleeveless top so my armpits are never on show.

I just wondered whether my poor armpits were neglected and whether other people show their armpits more love and care?!

Had gel nails done professionally for the first time three weeks ago for holiday.

I’ve booked to get my hands done again tomorrow, but didn’t book my toes as they’re still pretty decent.

I was going to get a new colour on my fingers today, but just realised that means fingers and toes will be different (which I’ve always been quite against for reasons unknown).

Is a mismatch as bad as I think? Or should I embrace it? What do you do?

My job is really beginning to affect my mental health. I work in care and there were some things and conditions before that I wasn't entirely happy with before but I continued on and focused on the positives.

This week has just been unreal. I don't know if it's the heatwave or what not. The lady I work for is worse than ever before just shouting orders at me. If she had half of a chance she would likely piss down my back or into my face. Ok, she wouldn't but she is worse now this week than ever before. Breaks even for water during this heatwave is limited. Bi am just expected to keep on going and going and going and work late while she eats at barbeques.

The sun is now beginning to make me sick too with migraines and I am in work hosesnyk ready to have a mental health breakdown and I am just not feeling well. The demands just keep going and going and going.

To make it worse I am supposed to provide a live in stint for this weekend too for a full week without even a day off and I realize now that the person I am working for just doesn't respect me as a person or worker. There's no way I am being painful appropriately to give up my live to work weeks on end like this.

This is long as I’m trying not to drip feed

Daughter came home this weekend specifically asking for advice. I’ve said I need to think about it as I’ve got an idea of what I want to say but want to mull it over for a few days as her whole relationship is at stake

basically she has a massive mil problem (and a fil)

every time her and her finance suggest a venue for the wedding pil say oh that won’t work for grandmother (let’s call her Mabel)

Mabel is in her 80’s but so are dd grandparents plus they are significantly disabled. Her grandparents are prepared to travel anywhere for the wedding, they acknowledge it’s dd and fiancés decision. Mabel refuses to travel

His parents say oh it’s your choice but whenever he suggests a venue they say oh it’s not goi g to work

Dd & sil are paying for the wedding. Families live 7 hours apart. Someone’s got to travel so dd thinks they chose where they want and everyone travels. Sil is trying to keep everyone happy and is upsetting dd to the point t where if he doesn’t stand up to them she’s not sure they can be together

He hasn’t clicked that his parents will only be happy if they get married in their home town

everytime dd visits her mil pressurises them to look at houses nearby. My dd keeps batting her away but mil keeps putting pressure on him to move back

dd and sil live approx midway between the families

tgeres lots I could say about mil but she is a problem

right where I am

sil need to sod his parents and him and dd chose where they want. It’s up to their parents & Grandparents to be happy with their choice and accept travel is involved. If you’re not prepared to travel then u don’t attend

problem is sil has never had to stand up to parents and is trying to keep them happy

dd has found THE venue but he’s refused to visit as it won’t work for his parents as Mabel won’t travel

we need to make sil wake up & realise his parents will only accept their home town & my dd will not get married their - she doesn’t like the place! She as a compromise has said no to getting married in her home town

ive said she needs to tell sil, WE have a problem. Parents will only accept your home town and I’m not willing to get married there, that doesn’t work for me so how are WE going to resolve this so he doesn’t feel she’s making him chose between her and his parents - even though she is

briwnies if you’ve got this far. I’ll try and answer any questions. I e made sil sound weak. He’s actually a lovely guy who doesn’t want to upset his parents but hasn’t realised a) it’s home town or nothing and b) how upset dd is as his parents are controlling the narrative

it became clear at the engagement party they threw how much control they want (long story but my dh was spitting) For dd the penny has dropped. Sil just thinks they are just being interested and loving parents. We need to get him to realise they are trying to control them without destroying his relationship with them and dd isn’t prepared to be in a relationship with him and his parents

If so, what are you doing?
It’s on here but I’m pottering in the garden.

Hi all this is just following on from this thread:

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5554153-dh-friends-want-to-discuss-me-i-want-to-be-there-aibu-tw?page=1

Thank you for your support there 💐

I don't know if I'm supposed to summarize the above thread? If so I will try. Sorry.

I don't know if my marriage can actually recover from this and it's confusing as DH is very sorry, right now but won't attend therapy and won't give me a decent apology. Instead he's said he'd cook us steak tonight and I want to throw his stupid pack of steak in his face! Steak isn't going to solve this is it?

I'm in this anger stage.
Past the shock.
Just furious.
Until I panic and think maybe I'm overreacting
Because maybe he did mean well and maybe I should be greatful for him 'protecting me'.... then I swing back to anger.

Can I ask, genuinely, if you were me, would this be marriage ending?

First time posting so please bear with me!

I don’t know if I’m being ridiculous so looking for some advice.

Been with DH 15 years, very normal relationship. 2 young kids, both pull our weight around the house so no issues there.

He does have a problem with telling lies about me to his family and I feel like I’m being made to seem dramatic? He will always blame the fact we’re seeing my family as the reason we can’t see his. Doesn’t matter if we’re genuinely busy doing something else, he’ll still say we’re seeing my family.

Then on holiday a couple of years ago, I was sending pictures from his phone to mine (with his permission) and he’d left it open on a conversation with his sibling. He was saying I was ruining the holiday, forced us back to the hotel room and wouldn’t let them out without me and was generally being painful. None of it was true, I had a minor cold that I took paracetamol for. Caused a massive argument and he had no real reason for it.

Now there’s this new lie for the last year. For context I had our second child last year who was insanely clingy and has never slept. On days DH would do hobby until 10/11pm a night, I’d cook me and my eldest a simple healthy, dinner. A couple of times the next day he ate some left over, sent a picture to his family group chat saying how disgusting it was, the horrible white people food he has to eat. Because he’s a fucking idiot, he forgot his messages are liked to the iPad, so I saw them while playing games with my eldest. Basically I’ve seen his do this a few times, all his family have a running joke about how shit of a partner I am and I can’t feed him properly. To the point that whenever we have meals with them at theirs they make comments like “isn’t it funny how much DH eats when he’s with us, it’s like he’s never been fed before. Do you cook for him at home?” And then they’ll giggle amongst themselves in their own language. And if they come to ours he’ll tell them to bring their own food because all I can cook is “fucking white people food”.

They didn’t know I’ve seen the messages, I didn’t say anything because I was very hormonal postpartum and didn’t know if I was being crazy. But I’m very much myself now and again saw some of these messages the other day and when I confronted partner it was made out as banter and I couldn’t take a joke. But I don’t think having private jokes that put your partner down and making snide comments you think they don’t understand is banter, I think it’s nasty.

Am I being crazy? It feels insane to get this worked up over a bloody dinner! Sorry if it’s long, didn’t want to drip feed!

i really can’t do trainers in very hot weather but I need something very comfortable for walking 20k plus steps a day. I’ve looked at Skechers, fitflop, teva but I think I need a recommendation. Has anyone found any with good arch support and very cushioned soles which might fit the bill?
I know there are lots of actual hiking sandals but I’d like something more attractive if possible

I’ve been wondering this for a while.
I keep seeing people say that men can’t cope on their own and always need to be in a relationship. But then I also see loads of women saying they can’t find a man who actually wants a relationship because all men seem to want is sex or something casual.
Maybe I’m missing something, but those two things don’t really seem to go together.
Another thing I’ve noticed is that most of the worry about being single or finding a partner seems to come from women. You don’t seem to see men talking about it nearly as much.
Curious what other people think..? If men can’t be single and need to be in relationships as much as people claim why do so many women say they have trouble finding a man that wants a relationship as all most men want is sex?