DD is 12 and has autism and sensory issues which makes eating very difficult for her. She eats no fruit or veg other than a small piece of broccoli and/or apple or cucumber which I insist on but it's difficult for her.

She does like the individual Innocent smoothies so I buy those for her, she might have one or two a day certainly no more.

But then I start to worry about the sugar and how we are supposed to be cutting down on fruit juice etc.

So good or bad in these circumstances? I give her vitamin tablets too.

I have placed a pretty hefty Amazon order. Christmas gifts and some stock up bits as I bulk buy all household essentials on there (it’s cheaper!)

The order was meant to be delivered between 11&2. Then it was pushed back, and now it’s just marked as “still arriving today”.

i suspect it’s not coming because it’s such a large delivery but AIBU to complain?!

Time to write this all down to see how it sounds.
I was watching Rhianna and Omar on BB when I suddenly realised that it looked and sounded familiar. My partner does this to me, but worse.
The blaming me for everything, and gaslighting me into believing that things didn't happen how I remember. Not letting me express my feelings without getting annoyed with me. Not letting me have an opinion. I ALWAYS watch what I say, like I'm constantly on eggshells. I get shouted and sworn at, and get the silent treatment for weeks sometimes. I've also been told that nobody will love me other than them. I'm always the one who ends the silent treatment by apologising, even when I know that I've done nothing wrong.
I'm so naive, that I thought it was all just my fault that I got treated like this, but hand on heart, I'm a good person. I've never even sworn or shouted back, or done anything bad, not once. I've only ever been good to this person in every way.
Most recently, because their birthday didn't go as they wanted because I was ill, I was sworn and shouted at down the phone and blocked.
We've been together for 6 years, not living together and no kids. It's hard for me to walk away, and I don't even know why.
My partner always comes back and sticks on the charm, and I fall for it every time, right until the vile treatment comes back.
I've been made to feel worthless and useless. I have also developed panic attacks due to the behaviour of this person, and that hasn't gone down well with them either.
This person has also been vile to some of my family members too, who have nothing to do with me now because of it.
If I leave for good, I'll basically be alone. I know that being alone is better than crying and being treated like crap, but it's so hard.
Financially this person has been a drain too, as they never take money outside on purpose. I've constantly paid for holidays, meals and days out over the six years, and never had a penny paid back.
This person is also sickly sweet to everyone at work and people think they're amazing. Why am I the only one who they treat like rubbish? I've done nothing to deserve it.
Also in the 6 years, I've been kept a secret from the mother, but had talks of marriage and kids in private.
I have been given a lot of love by this person over the years, which is what's always made me stay. However, the vile behaviour and names that I receive, are getting more frequent now.
I guess I'm posting this to vent, but also for a hand hold. I don't know how to leave, even though I know that I should.
I'm late 30s, and I guess I'm just scared to be alone. I've wasted over 6 years of my life, and I don't even have friends to keep me company. Sometimes I just wonder why I am still here. I always thought I was a strong person, but for this person I am weak.

AIBU to try and make contact?

I am reading a book I borrowed from the library. It's not anything especially heavy or literary, just a fairly enjoyable piece of fiction set during the First World War. "The Post Office Girls" by Poppy Cooper if anyone's interested.

However, I have noticed that where the author has used the word "gender" a previous reader has struck it out and written "sex" above it (photo attached). This has happened twice now but I am only halfway through the book so there may be more.

A bit OTT, no?

I'm organising my dad' funeral on Wednesday (28th Oct) and we're doing a small buffet after the service - just sandwiches and cake. I was going to get a M&S food order but after saying I could get it for Wednesday by ordering today, the website now won't let me do an order before 1st November.

I can't get a Morrisons, Waitrose or Sainsbury's party food order for Wednesday either, and Tesco don't seem to do party food orders.

What can I do? We need to provide light refreshments but don't really have capacity to organise from scratch. The actual burial is happening before the service, 40 miles away, so we won't be able to go to the church early and organise it ourselves.

Any suggestions welcome as I'm really panicking.

I am going out this evening to buy food we can eat for three days without cooking. But what? So far I thought,
Tinned sardines
Bread for the freezer
Jam and marmite
Nuts
Wine

What else would you buy? Please don't talk about things you can cook, I just want things that need no cooking but we could live on for three days. Thanks.

Hi. I’ve just caused a massive row with DP and wondering if I’m unreasonable.

DP has DSD with us this weekend, as we do every weekend. I love DSD, and try and make her feel very welcome and loved when she is here. Of course she goes in phases of who she wants to spend time with and at the moment I am not her favourite, DP is. Which is normal and expected.

Today we went shopping and I spent a lot of time just walking around on my own as DP went to different shops with DSD. Last night they had a “sleepover” in the living room and I spent the evening in our bedroom. I feel this is fine, DSD and DPs relationship will never compare to ours.

After getting in, I was cleaning the bedrooms ans walked into DP cooking dinner for DSD. I asked what he was having and he said DSD and me are having carbonara. DP and me usually eat around 8/9 with a bottle of wine. Nothing was cooked for me (I don’t eat bacon or cheese) so I said, rather sarcastically, I’m fine thanks nothing for me.

DP got annoyed and said well I’ll cook you something. I was polite and said no thanks, it’s too early for me, I’ll eat later, I just didn’t know you were cooking that’s all.

we usually sit with DSD whilst she eats and talk to her but don’t usually eat with her.

DP called me a selfish c**t and said I was causing tension and that I was being a baby about a dinner. Was I?

Thank you to everyone who let me know their Aldi experiences about a month ago - I appreciate every over of you!

Here's the update!
We love it!

First off - it's averaging at ~£35 cheaper a shop - which is pretty huge! (For reference we are 2 adults, 2 secondary school kids. Were paying around £180 a week on Tesco).

We were prepared for a quality drop as we were paying less. We absolutely did not get a quality drop. More often the quality and taste was better. The meat eaters have reported back that the meat is WAY better. The vegetarian items from the freezer section are also some of the best I've had. The yogurts and ice cream were way better (I was concerned about these). So far toiletry wise we've tried the shower gel and 'fake' sure deodorant - both great.

We love how many of the items are British.

We seem to have lucked out with one where the fruit and veg lasts - phew!

There's literally a few items which we wouldn't get again, none of which are a big deal. So great news!

Absolutely loving spotting the dupes, my oldest comes with me and he finds them hilarious.

The checkout is becoming less stressful - haha!

I would fully recommend to anyone to make the swap.

(Oh yeah, and you get to treat yourself to the bakery as a reward, hello pistachio croissant!)

Thanks everyone!!!!

I have a first date tonight with a man I’ve never met, we started talking online. He knows I’m very into cooking/baking, and just now while texting him I told him I made some protein pancakes. He asked if he could have some, I joked back that I would make him some, and because they’re protein pancakes they will make him strong. He replied “Strong so I can lift you in bed yeah 😏?”. I’ve never even met this man before. Now I feel that expectation and pressure for sex is there now and feel less excited about meeting him. It also feels very presumptuous of him, like he thinks because I’ve agreed to a date I’m up for sexual activity. I’ve not texted back yet because I’m not sure I want to go now.

For context; I have never made any sexual remarks towards him before or him to me, we have been talking for almost two weeks. I am conventionally attractive but I am not provocative in how I dress or how I present myself online. Most of my photos online are of my travel pictures, scenery and food etc. I don’t think I do anything to invite these remarks or give off the impression that I’d be into that so prematurely, but for some reason men will always try and initiate a conversation about sex before the first date. I’m getting tired of it. Am I overreacting?

House been on the market since Easter, it’s in the catchment for the much sought after local grammar, well priced, was valued originally at £595,000. We had an offer for £575,750 which we accepted during the summer hols but then fell though due to reasons unrelated to the house. We need to relocate, so dropped the price, even though much larger than most houses in the surrounding streets and better parking. Estate agents can offer no constructive feedback that I can act upon. I get that it’s not all grey etc but it’s a period house and has a wealth of features intact. Any ideas?
www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/91344150

It's happened and I am in my elasticated trouser era. Loads of sweatpants available but am I too old?

I looked at John Lewis (of course I did) and they have lots of Superdry ones which look comfortable but would I be a laughing stock (late 50s)? It all looks very 90s Britney and early Jack Wills to me which was my university era. Luckily I don't care but I do need to understand the exact coding so I can style out my mutton mistakes if I make them.

I would ask my children but I was partying so hard in the 90s that I forgot to have them.

This would be for wearing at home mostly but I do venture out in daylight hours occasionally.

I love the name Naomi, but there doesn’t seem to be a standard pronunciation. I had only ever heard NAY-OH-MEE, but I started questioning if that was actually the proper pronunciation after I heard a Jewish (albeit American) person (as it’s a Hebrew name) pronounce it NYE-OH-MEE. Our first child’s name (Stella) is very simple, so we’ve never experienced any pronunciation or spelling issues before. Also, do you like the name itself? What vibes do you get from it?

I'm 48, on ALL the HRT, high ferritin (over 100).

Very down in the dumps. Almost empty nester. Bored out of my brain. Term time office job. No spare cash. Live rurally.

I don't know what I'm going to fill the hours with for the remaining 30yrs of my life.

I don't want to volunteer. I don't go to church and have no interest in doing so after a catholic upbringing. I can't contemplate changing job as I am always knackered and the idea of having to adapt to something new makes me feel incredibly worried and knackered in advance. Also I feel I'm getting too old for that. My memory is abysmal. HRT made no difference to remembering things.

I spent much of the school summer holidays lying on the bed avoiding the heat and staring at the ceiling or having naps.

House is on the market so zero point in gardening etc. I do all the bare minimum maintenance.

I've got no get up and go. At all. I exercise which I love and eat loads of fibre, but I find eating protein exhausting. I don't like exercise classes (hate exercising with other people) so workout at home.

I am the cook so always need to be at home in the early evenings and at weekend dinner times.

If you became an empty nester what did you do? Where do I even start? How do I pull myself out of such a dip?

I did one of these threads under a different username a couple of years ago with hundreds and hundreds of replies and it genuinely brought me to tears. I can't find it to read back on.

I'm recovering from surgery and laying horizontal and was hoping some of you could revive your funny / cringy experiences to brighten my day.

After a long marriage, I have spent the last 3 years being superbly single and here are some that I have been through, which immediately gave me the 'ick.'

• I was taken on a lovely date in London. Really hit it off well. He drove me home (rooky error) and proceeded to indicate around every bend and curve in the road. I got home, thanked him for his time and blocked him.

• next one was a guy I was seeing for a few months. He told me 6 days in 'I generally really love you.' And would type Mabye instead of maybe. I just couldn't get over it.

• getting jiggy with someone. I proceeded to use my hand to help me along. After the deed was done and I (finally) got there, he proceeded to well up with actual tears and told me I shouldn't need to do that, and to give him constructive feedback on his performance so I wouldn't need to do that in future. I didn't sleep with him again.

• Those fucking ridiculous ballerina socks men wear. This might be trivial but I just wait for any bloke wearing them to burst into a full pirouette. This was also the same guy as above.

• Another hinge guy would send 😂 after every message. What are you up to today? 😂
I'm just getting home from work 😂

I have so many more. Many many more. Please tell me your experiences to remind me why I need to stay single!

Not somewhere I usually look as we don't have a big Sainsbury's near here with a clothing section, just the little convenience stores.

Saw they had a sale on though and ordered a few things and I'm SO impressed. Ordered this dress https://tuclothing.sainsburys.co.uk/product/tuc148498351 which admittedly is not the most fashion forward item on the planet but I was looking for a comfortable dress for holidays and smart-casual occasions. It's such good quality - really thick, 100% cotton and has pockets! £7.80 absolute bargain. Also bought a grey cardigan/vest thing which is very thick and will keep me cosy in winter.

So did I just hit it lucky or is the general quality of TU better than Asda, Tesco etc?

I genuinely think there are people milking the system but damn this will take a toll on many disabled children and adults. Can you imagine the impact and suffering of the situation?

My sister in law, is lovely - but her character can be sometimes dismissive and she’s been rude to my mum on multiple occasions, since having her son / my nephew / my mums grandson.

we follow each other on Vinted and I noticed, she put a lamb teddy up like a soft snuggly toy, for £1.50. I realised, this is the one my nan ( so her son’s great nan ) brought her son for Easter as my son and daughter got one too.

AIBU that this has majorly peed me off?! My Nans 86. I feel she should be holding onto things she buys her son, and I feel my brother should say something!

Hey!
got a two year old who used to eat anything
now I’m down to plain pasta, egg beans and sausage and chicken curry.

literally can’t get her to eat anything else.

any ideas to start from the basics again?
im really stuck for what to the her with and id rather try her with new stuff to see if i can find something she does actually like.

I’ve been seeing someone over the summer, we’ve recently agreed we want to pursue something more serious. He’s currently living in his marital home still and has a rental lined up but it’s not available until the start of January. I’ve suggested he could live with me until then which he is keen to do. He would still see his DC at the marital home as I won’t be introduced until a fair while into the future. The hope is that in a year or two we’d buy something together.

He hasn’t suggested anything regarding bills yet…surely it’s only right he pays his share? I know he has some financial challenges whilst working through the divorce as their house is quite costly.

My husband is getting more gorgeous with every year that passes. Hes really grown in to himself. Me, on the other hand am turning into my grandmother. I am a mum who works at home. Housewife we would have been called back in the day. Im in my mid 50's now and I need a glow up. I never wore make up and i think i need to start. but since many of my days are spent only in the house or caring for elderly mum i dont know when to put it on, Also whats a casual but polished style now adays with out looking like the local free P pastors wife?
i need serious help. Photo for ref. dont look quite my age yet but no idea how to dress or what to do with my face. can i have advice please Skincare regime is good and skin is clear. thanks peeps.

"Fertility experts" like Geeta Nargund in the news again insisting that "people still want to have children". Obviously some people wish they could have more children than they get to have. But it's never been a better world for people who are just not into it at all (or try one then realise it's not that much fun).

I don't think a survey asking people in vague terms if they'd like kids one day counts as proof of anything.

To think 10.30 10.45pm is too late for bedtime for DD 11 year 6.

DD 11 has allways been a "night owl" from young. She is diagnosis as Autistic, and CAMHS has done an ADHD referral too. However lately shes been falling asleep what I would consider late for her age. Even on a school night needing to be up for 7am. We start a bedtime routine taking about 1.5h. Shower, Pjs, bedtime snack etc (she won't read at bedtime). She's the type that her head hits the pillow and her mind wakes up. I have to stay with her to settle her due to anxiety, and not wanting her waking younger DD up(being as boring as possible) this can take 15 to 30mins.
On a none school night it isn't an issue as she can sleep in. She never naps.

I've been given a sleep diary to fill in with the look at percribing melatonin, but meds is a last resort, so for my own peace of mind, I'm wondering what an average bedtime is for 11 year olds, and what whould you consider too late that it causes issues.

I’ve begun to realise that the pressure I put on myself to buy lovely gifts for people I care about is creating stress and taking up huge amounts of time.

Year on year I delay buying my gifts for people because I cannot find anything that seems just right and I don’t want to settle for anything that doesn’t feel like a really lovely gift.

I don’t have huge amounts of gifts to buy. I have a tiny family and about eight wonderful friends who I consider to be my family, who have supported me through thick and thin and who I really want to show how much they mean to me by buying a really lovely gift.

I have a fairly modest budget, which probably makes things more difficult. Also, I guess most people already have everything that they really need and understandably have their own particular tastes and preferences which makes things even more challenging.

I try to pick up on comments that people make that might give me a clue as to a gift that they might like, and I try and dig deep into what I know about them to find something lovely. But still I spend hours and hours shopping online and in person struggling to find something that feels just right.

The knock on effect of this is that I don’t actually buy anything until really close to Christmas when I have run out of time and have to accept that the perfect gift doesn’t exist and begrudgingly buy the least worst option. I spend most of the run up to Christmas stressing over what to buy, leaving no time to enjoy the festive build up.

I have one DC, late teens and buying gifts for them is not so tricky but everyone else I find so hard to buy for. I realise not buying gifts is an option but I don’t want to do that for various reasons.

I would love this year to be different so I can enjoy the build up to Christmas. Can anyone relate and / or help me approach this differently please?

I know this has been asked before but really would be grateful for recommendations. Even with waterproof spray my Seasalt one isn’t cutting it in this weather. Thank you!

That's it. I've reached the point where I just can't bear the thought of Christmas anymore. We're only in October and I'm already stressing about hosting, logistics, shopping, cooking, the lot.
I've been saying for years that I don't want to do it anymore. All our family lives overseas, so Christmas always means either travelling to them or having them come to us. Mostly they come to us. Either way, it all falls on me, and I'm done.
So this year I've told the family I'm not hosting and I'm not travelling either.
Not sure if it's perimenopause, middle age or just years of Christmas fatigue, but I can't stand the whole thing anymore. The endless consumption, buying stuff, eating too much, travelling, organising everything. I just don't get it anymore, especially when it's making me miserable.
I can't stand buying stuff for the sake of stuff. I can't eat anything more than a carrot now without getting indigestion. I can't bear the thought of being stuck in a house full of people for days on end. Just thinking about it makes me feel claustrophobic.
It just doesn't work for me anymore. I don't want presents, elaborate meals, guests or a packed schedule. I just want a few days to chill, do absolutely nothing and not feel under pressure to make Christmas magical for everyone else.
AIBU? Has anyone else reached this point, or am I turning into the Grinch?