What fresh hell is this. I’m finding little hairs in places I didn’t before which need to be plucked out. In the right (wrong) lighting I can see a few fine hairs. Not enough for a beard by any stretch but this is not a problem I’ve had until recently.

I’m only in my mid-30s, I didn’t expect this for at least another 15 years.

Please tell me I’m not alone and how do you get rid of them!

Sorry if this is already on here. I know Vinted has gone downhill since rejigging all the sizing, but is anyone else suddenly having their feed flooded with items from America and Australia? I only spotted it because the prices were so weird (completely non-round numbers) and have taken them all off my favourites, but I've counted and out of the first fifty items on my recommendations, all but two are from those countries. It feels like they are definitely being forced onto my home page.

I'm only using Vinted for the environmental aspect, so why would I would to ship something from the other side of the world? I contacted them for help, but their chatbot basically said, 'Nothing we can do, you can't turn off sellers from another country.'

In a way this is actually quite useful, as I don't have to use willpower to quit the platform, as it's literally unusable for me now until they realise they're losing custom and put filters in place. Any tips, or do I just move to eBay?

DSis is 7 years younger than me and I’ve agreed to go on her abroad hen weekend next month. Every detail has been planned by her MoH and there’s an in depth itinerary.

Last night, MoH put a message in the group to say for 2 of the events (a meal and a beach club) there will be consistent outfits required, one of these will be swimwear.

She is ordering the swimwear and put a poll in the group to ask people to record their size.

I take issue with this because 1. The swimwear in question is a thong bikini and 2. I find it embarrassing to share my size in front of the group (I am larger than them all, which is why I mentioned the age gap).

I privately messaged MoH to say I’ll bring my own swimwear which will also be white so it matches.

Dsis called me an hour later (she’s not in the group) - she said that I should just wear it for the photo at the start and then change straight out of it l, that she wants me to get involved and she’d be gutted if I’m not in any photos and not matching. I shared why I’m reluctant but she’s having none of it.

Am I being awkward here? I feel like it’s a lot to expect. Before anyone suggests it, I can’t cancel and I will be going on the hen, she’s my sister and it’s paid for.

She likes jewellery but I don’t want to get the wrong thing. She drives and has a car to use. Cha

Doom scrolling on fb as cant sleep.
An advert pops up on my feed from M&S for crotchless thongs. Have I actually fallen asleep and am dreaming ?! WTAF is M&S thinking?!! They appear to be stocking Anne Summers-talk about rebrand of underwear dept!

Everyone seems to accept that it's obvious that the private sector, speaking very generally, pays better salaries in-year but the public sector makes up for it in excellent defined benefit (DB) pensions.

As in, you get a certain amount paid to you indefinitely, based on how many years of service, your level reached, average or final salary, etc.

Everyone acts like this is normal but it is actually insane!

Growing up in school I was always taught that it was a fundamental principle of a parliamentary democracy that one parliament cannot bind another. Parliament should be able to override anything a previous parliament did, so that voters always have the ability to change course democratically and nothing is locked in forever.

But having DB pensions for public sector workers is binding future parliaments into very large financial commitments that will leave them increasingly less wriggle room.

It would be one thing if they were defined contribution pots that were in each individual's name. That would operate independently and doesn't represent an obligation on future governments to pay out pensions out of future taxpayer money, maybe future taxpayers who have different priorities for what they want to spend the money on.

AIBU to think public sector salary culture should, if anything, be the reverse: high salaries now, because the government is legally not allowed to commit to future compensation in another government's name?

Hi all,

long time lurker, first time actually posting so go easy on me 😂

i've read this place for YEARS without making an account but i've finally caved because i've gone round and round in my own head.

Basically last night i found out my husband had been messaging another woman. I wasn’t snooping, he left his phone on the sofa and went for a shower and the message popped up

Before anyone asks, no they weren't explicit. No meeting up (as far as i know). No declarations of love. Nothing like that.

She was quite a bit younger than him, and what i can't seem to get out of my head is that she's almost the same age i was when we first got together (21) he had 2 DC already now 17 & 14 and we have 4 together, our eldest together is 11 and i got pregnant with him quite quickly into the relationship

He says it got out of hand, he's apologised, showed me everything that was still there, blocked her without me asking and has basically done everything i'd have wanted him to do afterwards.

But i still feel rubbish and was got a busy house, six kids in total and pets and it being school holidays and he's doing shifts so i'm trying to keep everyone alive until September 😂 so it's not like i've got loads of time to sit dwelling on it, but i still do. We’re due to go away on friday and i think maybe a week would do us good but I don’t know if im mad for even considering going. I haven’t told anyone which is why im finally posting here after being a lurker for years

am i making this into something bigger than it actually is because i'm in my own head too much? but also this isn’t the first time

Happy to answer questions if i've missed anything because i almost certainly have. Please be kind if you can

Shiny new thread.

So, Sarah's been arrested for killing Theo, Kit is trying to get her out of prison without implicating himself, (and is desperate to pin it on Gary,) and Gary and Maria are at loggerheads after Gary decided to help Sarah cover her tracks!

Swain is as useless as ever, constantly talking very loudly about any case she's working on, and in front of as many people as possible!

Betsy has had a stroke, after engaging in non-fatal strangulation during sex with Dylan, and Dylan's in trouble for it, even though Betsy doesn't blame him. Sean (his dad) is trying to blame anyone but him, even Brodie!

Most other storylines/characters seem to be fairly quiet at the moment, but I'm sure they will touch on them again soon...

Been with DP for 6 years. Absolutely love the man, I can’t fault him and we have never had any cross words. I love him more and more as the years go by. I have no doubt in my mind that he is my person, and I’ve never felt like that about anyone before.

I’m 45, he’s a bit younger. I have 2 DC, he has no children. My DC are 23 and 16 and still both live at home. I’m renting and he gets accommodation from work during the week.

He’s always been incredibly generous towards both me and my DC, he earns a lot more than I do and insists of paying for pretty much everything, eg holidays, meals out, if I stop at a fuel pump he’ll jump out and fill my car up and pay (he bought me the car too now I think of it). He really is the kindest person and never makes me feel bad or holds it over me, he treats me as an equal.

We are currently looking at buying a house together. I have some family inheritance, he has savings, together we have a large deposit (which would be 50/50 both of our money) We’ve talked about the mortgage and he would pay around 3/4 of it and I would pay 1/4 as I earn a lot less.

I am so happy that after a very slow burn, he is taking this huge step in commitment. However, one thing that bothers me is that he just won’t marry me. For not good reason other than he just doesn’t see the point. Both of us are pretty antisocial and I would genuinely hate the fuss of a big wedding, literally buggering off on holiday or going to the registry office with minimal people there would be my dream. But he just won’t and that makes me feel really sad.

I feel like if I go ahead with buying a house with him, there’s a lot of positives. A nicer place to live, something to leave my DC, security. But also I’d be giving up any hope of ever being married, as I know DP won’t do that. I’ve never bought a house before so I don’t really understand how the legalities work and whether being unmarried is going to be an issue, if/when one of us dies?

At the moment yes I am the one benefiting financially from the relationship, but in the future I will be getting a fair chunk of inheritance, whereas he’ll get nothing from his family, so long term things even out.

I know I’d be an idiot to leave him as at my age I’m not likely to find anyone better, and honestly he is one in a million, he’s a good man through and through.

I feel like this is a huge step for both of us and just need to know what we need to put in place, as we’re not married and sadly never likely to be.

Just a PSA for any unsuspecting customers out there. The OUTNET (following the sell off / new owners) are absolutely not to be trusted.

Please people be very wary of being swayed by their current sale prices. They are not shipping items, not honouring refunds and not responding to complaints.

Payal have also now been removed as a payment option which is a HUGE red flag.

I like many others have monies outstanding for an order / returned and accepted months ago and also a ‘phantom’ order which they have confirmed will not be fulfilled but also have failed to refund.

I have had to request a charge back and also request PayPal step in for both orders. PayPal have confirmed that they are aware of The OUTNET and their current practices.

https://uk.trustpilot.com/review/www.theoutnet.com

What bra would work with this style of dress? I’ve seen a few dresses with similar necklines and I think they’d be great for this hot weather. But totally stumped re. the bra situation. I’m a 32E so braless is not an option and strapless is never that practical. Don’t mind a thin strap showing but not the cup or band.

As a family we have had a “dream holiday” booked for around a year that took 3 years to save for. We are due to go in 3 weeks and it’s for a 3 week holiday. It’s me, my husband and our 2 children in early to late teens.

This past weekend I ended up in hospital with a pretty serious health event, think cardio, and I cannot travel for this holiday, still in hospital and not sure how long I’ll be here for.

Just today my husband said we needed to discus the holiday. I thought he was going to discuss moving it to another time in which I can come but no, he seems to think is acceptable that the 3 of them go and I stay home and recover, alone, and just don’t go at all.

AIBU to think we should just rebook the whole thing until I’m well enough to go or am I selfish to even consider asking them to stay home and rebook?

im off my head on pain meds and can’t even think about this logically right now.

Does anyone know when the M&S sale starts? I’m interested in picking up some Nobody’s Child on the cheap.

It was ar DP's parents'. We've been together 2 years, I've met them a handful of times but we don't socialise with (either of) our parents that much. Tend to pop in for coffee on our own, rather than both go for lunch/the afternoon.

His parents are lovely, very similar in attitudes to mine and easy company. Very chatty which means you don't have to work at the conversation, which I am very bad at.

This time his aunt was there, who I'd never met, but she was lovely company too.

Mum had done a nice lunch and we stayed 2 hours, had a very pleasant time.

But, I am shattered. To the point that if I sit down I can't keep my eyes open. Do others get like this after social things, even ones they've enjoyed?

I have never had one but I dont think i can

I do imagine ripping the head off of some people on occasion though 😄

Can you? Have you? Would you at this point in your life, if someone was very deserving?

I might take up boxing 🤔

My daughter is 4 almost 5 and has done swimming lessons since she turned 2, she did waterbabies and then moved to leisure centre lessons at 4. For anyone familiar with the lessons she’s just moved up to stage 4 and has got her 25 metres certificate at the weekend

While I was at work earlier in the week my husband mentioned her swimming, and my MIL made a comment about how kids should be kids and not pushed into ‘competing’. FIL agreed and said it’s unnecessary and every child gets there in the end, there’s no need for such pushy lessons

She does a lesson once a week and I probably take her once every 2 weeks on an evening, sometimes every week. She enjoys swimming, she’s not pushed into anything but swimming lessons for me are not negotiable.

It’s just made me feel like shit but I’m probably being over sensitive

NC’d for understandable reasons.

DP went through my phone last night, and found very old videos I hadn’t deleted of me and my ex. Extremely stupid I know, both to have taken them in the first place (not something I was keen on, and my face isn’t visible), and to have not deleted them. But honestly, I forgot they were on there. I’ve got stuff on my phone going back nearly 10 years, it all carries over when I’ve upgraded my phone and I’ve never looked back at it/got round to deleting things.

He went mental, said we are over and he doesn’t want to listen to my ‘excuses’, he considers it a betrayal and questions whether I’ve still looked at them regularly when alone.

I am distraught, I love him and can’t imagine my life without him in it. We don’t live together but he was staying here this weekend and stormed out last night. He has ignored me today but I don’t seem to be blocked.

Do you think ending the relationship is over the top? Would you give it a day or two before contacting him again?

Me+Em Swing blouse I bought a lovely cotton swing blouse in Monoprix when I was in France last year and the shape is lovely in this heat. I have been looking for one with short sleeves and a v neck and this is the only one I have been able to find. It's perfect but £115. I've tried searching using "cotton swing blouse" but nothing as perfect as this turns up. I am trying to rationalise it by thinking I will wear it a lot but can anyone suggest alternatives that are cotton, v-neck, short sleeve, and khaki colours? Up to £50.

And would you want it?

Has Dh, one young Dc and dogs, lives overseas by the beach and countryside, nice house with pool and sea views.
Works 6 hours per week from home. Does all drop offs and pick ups, food shop, dinners, majority to do with Dc and sorting bills. Has a cleaner.
Dh works Mon-Fri -finishes 4.30, no one works weekends.
Days are free based around Dc school drops, coffee with friends, Pilates, yoga, studying or reading if you like, watching Netflix all day if you like, shopping, beach, pool, garden

Would you call this a soft life? Would you like it, be honest?

I have stage 4 of an interview process next week. They want me to meet them face to face before formally offering me the role. There’s lunch and then some meetings with the team.

Because the team are spread all over the country we’re to meet in a central location which is a 3 hour train journey for me. I arrive on the day with very little time to spare before the lunch.

Really struggling with what to wear in terms of how formal to be but also something that will survive the train journey without me looking like a crumpled mess. Or should I change just before the train gets in?

I need sleeves as hate my arms and have big boobs so need something that has a waist. Any suggestions?

I know a lot of people think it’s easier because they play together but honestly life with just one child seems so much nicer, calmer, so much lovely one to one time devoted to one, their interests tailored for and you get to properly enjoy parenting.

I seem to be really unique on this as everywhere I see having two is easier and I don’t see it myself?

I’m currently off work as I work term time and I’m so annoyed with myself because I’m being lazy.I met up with friends last night they are term time too and several were reeling off all the things they’d been doing, gardening, decorating, exercising. I’d literally been doom scrolling, watching crime documentaries and had a nap.

My kids are teens now so more or less sort themselves out but they can be so messy and constantly in the fridge and making snacks and it’s really draining trying to do things round the house with them under my feet.

But there’s so much I could be doing, I wish I was one of those energetic, on the go types but I can waste hours just lolling about.

If you’re energetic what’s your secret or if you’re a lazy type like me have you found a way to motivate yourself?

My hair has lost so much density over the years. It’s fine but with a coarse texture so I have a keratin treatment once a year. I’m thinking of trying clip in extensions to add volume. Because my hair is so fragile I don’t want anything actually connected to the hair long term and I also don’t think I would be able to keep up the maintenance with normal hair extensions. I also really struggle to get volume in my hair.

Does anyone use these regularly? Are they easy to use and have they made a difference?

I'm interested in this in a kind of 'statistics' sense. I see a lot of dresses and skirts in stores and online, but not many people wearing them in real life. Even in work related situations, across the board, I see women and girls mostly wearing trousers or jeans.

Might be location specific, I live in a very boring, unpretentious, not very fashion forward area, so it could be skewing things a bit; but I do travel about quite a lot and still maintain that year-round most women are in trousers/jeans.

I will admit that I used to love a well made breezy skirt with a flat waistband and minimal top but I live mostly in straight jeans these days. It is so hard to find that style now amongst the paperbag elastic styles or structural artisanal stuff.

So I am curious, are you mostly in trousers/jeans or skirts/dresses?

Hi everyone,

I’m looking for some honest advice and maybe a bit of perspective on a friendship dynamic that’s left me feeling quite sad.

I’ve been part of a close group of mums since our children started Reception together. We became especially close during lockdown and have shared some wonderful memories over the years. Originally it was very much a group of mums and children, but over time it’s naturally evolved into more of a couples’ friendship group.

I’m a single parent to my daughter, and apart from one couple who are currently separating, everyone else is now part of a couple. As partners have become more involved, I’ve increasingly felt like I’m on the outside. The couples often get together at each other’s houses, and the main WhatsApp group is largely driven by one particular couple who organise most things.

The issue that’s brought everything to a head is planning next year’s holiday.

We all went away together last year and, although there were lovely moments, I realised our holiday styles are actually very different. They love large, busy resorts with endless activities and a lively atmosphere, whereas my daughter and I are much happier somewhere smaller and quieter where we can explore local towns and beaches.

The organiser has found a resort that everyone else seems keen on, but because I’m paying for a room on my own, it would cost me and my daughter around £4,000. Most of the couples are paying around £2,500 between two adults and their children, so it’s a very different financial commitment for me.

When I mentioned the cost, I wasn’t expecting everyone to change their plans for my sake, but I had hoped there might be a conversation about whether there were other options that could work for everyone. Instead, I was told I could simply bring another friend to share my room – someone who doesn’t know the group at all. That left me feeling as though I was a logistical problem to solve rather than a friend whose circumstances mattered.

Life has also been quite difficult recently as my dad has dementia, so I think I was probably hoping for a little more understanding than I experienced.

I know people are entitled to spend their money however they choose and book the holiday they want. I genuinely don’t begrudge them that. I think what’s upset me is that this situation has highlighted something I’ve been feeling for a while – that as the group has become more couple-focused, I’ve gradually become less central to it.

I’ve muted the WhatsApp group because I found myself feeling increasingly hurt watching all the excitement about a holiday I simply can’t justify financially. Part of me wonders whether this is just a sign that friendships naturally change, and perhaps it’s time to step back from the group while keeping in touch with the individuals I’m closest to.

Has anyone else experienced something similar? Am I being oversensitive, or does this sound like a friendship that’s simply evolved into something different? I’d really appreciate some honest perspectives.