I haven't spoken to a relative I was very close too for months now after we went on holiday together. It started after I asked her to please stop making noise late at night. I asked politely. After that she just turned on me. Saying she wanted to do everything by herself from then on. I apologised the next day but she stopped engaging with me for the most part even getting up and leaving me at the dinner table with strangers and sitting with others. Background she is grieving the loss of her husband so maybe I'm taking the brunt of her grief.

I thought we were close but when I tried to hug her goodbye at the airport she turned away. I haven't heard from her. I don't feel I did anything wrong in asking about the noise. AIBU for not contacting her either?

I have three children aged 7, 5 and 2. My husband’s sister has one child, aged 2. She’s a single mum by choice.

My SIL has quite strong parenting preferences. She’s very anti-plastic toys and prefers everything to be wooden and pastel-coloured. She’s also very anti-screens and doesn’t allow sweets. That’s absolutely her choice, and I’m not criticising how she chooses to raise her child. My children, however, are fairly typical kids. We have brightly coloured plastic toys, toy swords, all sorts of things, and I don’t have a strict no-screen policy. I’m not saying they’ll be glued to an iPad all Christmas, but equally I’m not going to promise that they won’t have any screen time at all. I certainly won’t stop my children having chocolate or a mince pie on Christmas Day (especially the two eldest).

We’re all spending Christmas Day at my in-laws’ house, and SIL has messaged me saying that she appreciates we all have different parenting styles, but she’d prefer it if we didn’t bring any plastic toys, particularly around her toddler, and asked if we could have no screens for the duration of our stay to avoid a situation where her child might join in and watch something, and no sweet treats within sight of her child. I honestly don’t know how to respond. I have no intention of deliberately putting things in front of her child that she doesn’t want him playing with, I’m happy to respect her rules for the gifts to her child and I’m happy to be sensible and considerate. But I don’t think it’s reasonable to expect me to restrict what my own children can bring or play with or eat because she has decided that certain toys and activities aren’t acceptable for hers.

I feel like everyone in the family tends to bend over backwards to accommodate SIL’s preferences (because she’s had a traumatic few years in terms of love life and decided to have a baby solo), and I’m starting to resent the expectation that the rest of us should just go along with everything to avoid upsetting her. Would it be unreasonable to reply along the lines of “I completely respect that you have different rules for your child, I will of course respect your wishes for Freddie’s gifts (ie not gifting Freddie a brightly coloured plastic toy, an iPad, a chocolate Santa) but I can’t promise to follow those same rules with mine. I’ll obviously be considerate, but I need to parent my own children in the way that works for us.”

Or am I being unnecessarily difficult? It’s Christmas, and I don’t want to create family tension, but I also don’t want to spend the whole day feeling like I’m being told how to parent my children.

Me-

Covid came from a Chinese lab.
Epstein's death was engineered by a third party, whether by murder or by compromising the suicide watch.
Lucy Letby's conviction isn't sound and was affected by institutional motivation to find a cause for babies dying other than negligence and squalor across the department. (FAOD I have no idea whether she is innocent or guilty.)

I feel like everyone should watch her full interview.

https://news.sky.com/video/comedian-lucy-beaumont-i-offered-to-pay-legal-fees-for-woman-who-signed-walliams-nda-13610774

Bravo👏

I've been out with a guy a few times in the last month and we've slept together. Sex was amazing - some of the best of my life tbh. He's been in consistent contact since but here's the rub:

• he holds a senior position at an NGO
• he has a young toddler

At the start this lead to a rescheduled first date was all fine after. At the weekend he asked to make plans in advance to see me yesterday but then cancelled 3 hours before, very apologetic and citing childcare issues. He asked if I could do a lunchtime date today and I said I could - and asked him to confirm in the morning.

So here we are, almost lunchtime and he hasn't messaged. I sent a quick check in about 10.30 but nothing. I feel so disrespected that he couldn't even take the time to say he can't make it or whatever. I am actually shocked that he's just dead silent and left my hanging.

I almost feel like blocking him. Would you say something or not?

Just watched a video and the man is pronouncing "Chamber" like Cham / ber

I pronounce it like Chay / mber

Am I doing it wrong?

I didn't even know she was the one, and when I clicked, it was too late, already sold. Pic attached - grey, purple and yellow. Gorgeous colours in the right ratios, wool, just the right shape. I can't find another anywhere else (well, some Chinese knock off sites that I can't imagine deliver on their promise) and haven't found an alternative. The second pic could have been another vinted contender but angora in the mix nixed it for me. I saw these https://www.wolfandbadger.com/eu/lola-sweater-in-multicolor-multicolour/ & https://www.wolfandbadger.com/eu/striped-stitch-maya-crew-multicolour-stripe/ but they are too expensive not to be right.

I'm looking for boxy, wide stripes and jewel tones, in merino, wool or cashmere (or mix). No angora, mohair or acrylic. I have considered knitting one myself but I'm painfully slow at the best of times, currently exacerbated by actual shoulder pain. I'd pay £200-300 because I'll wear it forever. Very grateful for any suggestions

I’m 37 and really want to invest in myself a bit. I’m not looking to completely change how I look or have anything particularly drastic done.

More of a natural, classy, polished look – healthy glowing skin, lovely hair, looking a bit fresher and generally feeling good about myself.

I’m particularly interested in glass-skin skincare, Korean beauty products, anything that genuinely improves skin texture and hydration, and products that give you that healthy glow.

I’m also open to beauty treatments, hair treatments, brows, lashes, facials, teeth whitening etc.

But I don’t want to waste £500 on products that are all hype and end up sitting in a bathroom cupboard!

So, Style & Beauty people, what are your absolute best buys?

• What skincare products made a genuinely noticeable difference to your skin?
• Any Korean skincare holy grails?
• Best anti-ageing products that are actually worth the money?
• Any treatments you’ve had that made you think WOW, I look so much better?
• Best hair products or treatments for healthier, fuller-looking hair?
• Any little beauty investments that made a surprisingly big difference?

I’m interested in the expensive recommendations AND the £10 products that outperform everything else.

Basically, if you had £500 to spend on yourself, what would you buy or have done?

Give me all your recommendations, please!

I’m ready to take notes. 😂❤️

For the first year I cannot think of many things I’d like. The only things that come to mind are not very useful/indulgent gifts but maybe that’s the whole point?

On my potential wishlist so far:

• Cute and soft and good quality pyjama
• Bath robe from Piglets in bed (but I’d wear it as a normal robe, I think?)
• 1 or 2 hand painted, fancy mugs
• A recipe book
• I’d like a nice staub cocotte but as we are spending Xmas abroad, gifts will ideally need to be something to pack in the luggage and also not sure that is a proper gift for me, iyswim
• A bigger backpack for work
• sheepskin slippers
• a crossbody bag I saw on vinted for a third of the original price
• lego orchid

I obv wouldn’t get all of these!
I like them all but usually put clothes or jewelry in my list and feel as if I am not inspired this year.
What is everyone else wishing for?

I am 39, if that matters.

Hi all. Here's our new thread. Giving Rainbow a break and until Reastie returns. Sorry there wasn't a more inspiring title, didn't spot any comedy typos this time.

This is intended as a friendly, kind, safe, warm and fuzzy place for people to share discounts, bargains and Christmas gift ideas both online and IRL. Please note the tone and intention of the thread and join with spirit as generous as DC helping themselves to the Christmas chocolate celebrations

Here’s some useful information about how to save the thread or a specific post so you don’t need to have a message to check in for every thread so you have the thread saved:

To watch the thread - click on the little bell that has ‘watch’ under my first message. This adds the whole thread to your ‘watched threads’

You can also bookmark a specific post by clicking on the ‘bookmark’ under the specific post. This saves your exact place in a thread but doesn’t alert you to new replies.

If you have any referral links or codes, please share them on the referral thread here:

www.mumsnet.com/talk/christmas/5444936-bargain-referrals-thread-8

A reminder that we don't use affiliated links on here please

🎄 Emoji to copy if required for posting bargains as some agree this makes deals easier to spot. (or post in bold)

Welcome back everyone. New thread just in time for Black Friday.

How is everyone's self restraint looking? 😂😂😂

Fingers crossed for some good bargains this year especially all those advents that haven't sold out. We've probably bought some of those already but let's ignore that.

Happy bargain hunting. 😍

I’m a British woman in a long-term relationship with a Danish man. We have a daughter (2 years old) together.

We’ve lived in Copenhagen since 2019, and I’m a permanent resident here. I’ve successfully worked as a copywriter in tech companies until very recently, when I was laid off. There seem to be no jobs available in my field thanks to AI replacing my role, and a shift away from hiring foreigners. I have ‘unemployment insurance’ for two years which covers most of my salary. After that, it runs out and I would either need a job, or to go on government benefits - which would prevent me from ever becoming a Danish citizen. Luckily my partner earns well, but it’s still going to hit our living standards eventually.

It’s very hard here to get non-specialist work here, and of course Danes are prioritised for it. I’m struggling at the thought of being unemployed potentially forever. Even warehouse work is a challenge to find. I’ve had non-Danish colleagues who’ve been out of work for 1-2 years already.

I am considering moving back to the UK to access a bigger job market that won’t discriminate against me based on my nationality - even if it’s finding a new career path. I know the UK isn’t great right now economically, but I’m feeling really stuck, lonely and bored sitting at home all day, knowing I can’t get a job.

I’m curious if anyone else has made the move back, and if they’d recommend it? Or whether I should get used to being unemployed potentially for the next 30 years.

If you’re not interested in celeb gossip feel free to ignore. I’m just watching her reality show on BBC.

Stacey Solomon has made her living, and a very good one at that, by selling her life. Her sister and her dad have also followed in her footsteps.

She now has 3 reality programmes, she also does Instagram on which she’s spent years documenting her life, her children’s lives, showing her followers round her house and her renovations. She films her children all the time including her eldest failing his GCSEs, his job interview and showing her followers their bedrooms.

On her reality show she has a run in with a photographer where she complains that she’s entitled to privacy. The photographer argues that people wouldn’t have an interest if she didn’t post on Instagram. She then argues that she doesn’t post her address (however it’s very obvious where she lives). She also complains that she’s had a photographer turn up at her nephews football tournament and it’s unfair as there are children there.

Aibu to think she’s a hypocrite, she has no real talent that she can make money off other than being a TV/insta personality.

Haven’t bought a new perfume for a couple of years but been told by my mum to treat myself for Christmas. Went to Fenwicks and Boots yesterday to try a few and everything (in my price range of up to £100) seemed so sickly sweet! Or is this yet another side effect of peri menopause that everything smells disgusting to me now?

i got out of the habit of wearing fragrance regularly in covid but ones I have previously liked are:

Chloe (day time)
hugo boss femme (day)
hugo deep red (day)
YSL libre (evening)
armani code (evening)

Yesterday I tried Lancome la vie est belle and varieties thereof and found them overwhelmingly sweet. I also tried My Way by armani and a couple of others which were on offer but just so heavily vanilla scented.

any suggestions welcome and especially those at boots so I can get rewards points.

TIA

My family (mum and her partner, my sister and half sister and their families) are due to visit and stay with us for a few days over Xmas. We live about 150 miles from them so we alternate spending Christmas in the two places, although we always go out for Christmas dinner. My half sister doesn’t always join us but does sometimes and is this year.

We all agreed on the restaurant for Christmas Day a few months ago and I booked it. My half sister is now saying she can’t afford it and wants us to host Xmas dinner at home. We really don’t want to do that as we look forward to going out for it, not cooking and just relaxing.

I’ve suggested that she comes before or after Xmas for a day or two instead but she thinks that’s unfair and doesn’t see why we can’t just cook dinner at home. My mum is siding with her and it’s causing friction. Are we being unreasonable to not want to change our plans and not want to have to cook dinner ourselves when we were looking forward to going out?

My DB and SIL are great sharers of information, and so if you don’t share they just assume everything is easy or alright for you. So the whole family heard about their fertility struggles - absolutely fine to share, but when I announced my pregnancy I was told I was lucky I had it so easy- even though they had no idea.

Now some might disagree but I say breastfeeding is tough. It needs a bit of determination, in the early days I was sore and tired but as it is baby is 6 months and still EBF. I am proud of this but never told anyone how hard I found it.

My SIL has just given birth to her second and after not BF her first really wants this one to be EBF, I had a call from my DB last night saying she is very tired and can I pump a couple of bottles for them… as if I can just produce a couple of bottles on cue!!!

I don’t even have a pump- he said they could Amazon me one.

Am I being unreasonable to say no? My parents and brother are saying I would find it easy and she is struggling and don’t I want what is best for the baby.

Im only just starting to feel I am on the downward slope with feeding after months or gritting my teeth and getting on with it.

Going to a fabulous 40th birthday party in Malaga in December! Stunning venue, no expense spared.

I have no idea what to wear! There’s no dress code, but it will be a fabulous event, so anything goes!

I’m 48, 5ft 3 and a curvy size 10 - help!! I’d love a dress that makes me feel great, but don’t know where to start. Happy with bold colours and equally happy with black. Any idea? Have you seen anything with the wow factor?

thank you!! 🤩

We don’t have the biggest house and our very small dining table is in an alcove in the lounge, we pull it out for meals but there is 6 of us squeezed around this 4 seater table with 2 extra chairs.
Last year we decided to do a cold meat buffet instead and just have our plates on the sofa and it worked so we’ve decided to do the same again.
This year ds has a girlfriend and has asked if she can come for Christmas and I explained it will only be buffet but he’s unimpressed and says she’s from a posh family and would expect a traditional roast dinner.

Aibu to say we can’t cater for anyone else? We don’t mind if she wants to come for a while or even for some of the buffet but I will not be cooking a Christmas dinner.
Ds is concerned about her reaction to a non traditional roast.
We have met her once and I did put on a similar cold meats buffet back in the summer but she didn’t eat anything.

How do you get an assessment for dysgraphia? I have no clue where to start.
My DS is 15.
He holds a pen in a most unusual way. I can't even understand how he manages to write whilst holding it the way he does. His fingers wrap round the pen in a sort of claw grip and his thumb.wraps right round over the top of his fingers. How he manages to write legibly like this I don't know. He presses overly hard on to the paper with his pen. He says his hand and wrist start hurting quite quickly when writing.
He holds his cutlery wrong. He doesn't hold it correctly in his grip despite a lifetime of me correcting him. He also holds his knife and fork in the wrong hands, the wrong way round, which is bizarre. He's right handed, but holds his fork in his right hand and knife in his left hand. When I correct him and tell him to swap his knife and fork round, and teach him how to properly hold his cutlery, he can't do it and gets instantly stressed.
Is this Dysgraphia? I've only just heard of this. Until now I thought he was just unable to be taught how to hold pens and cutlery.
Now I wonder if there's actually a cause?
I know this is a bit unusual but does anyone else have any experience?
How do you get teenagers assessed?
Thank you!

I’m 4 days post op and so bored, if you have any question ask away.

I started MJ a few weeks ago. the first week was dreadful, stomach pain, indigestion, exhaustion. By the end of the week I felt a bit better so did the second jab because I had lost four pounds and wanted to keep going. I didn't have much reaction so felt encouraged. Lost more weight. Then I went on holiday and at the end of the week decided not to jab again because the food on holiday was making me feel ill on the jab.
Returned home, restarted on Wednesday. I have had the most dreadful stomach pains 24/7, feel like I have a stomach bug. I have diorreah and am sleeping really badly. I know it's the jab. It's got to the point that I am frightened to eat at all because everything i eat makes it worse. I'm drinking loads of water.

I don't think I can go on with this, it's intolerable. Has anyone else had these symptoms? My next jab is due on Wednesday and I just can't do it.

I’ve said aggressive as it often is on here. Is there a middle ground? I’m losing my way with my 3 yo. And my mind!

So I had a 4 day period (usually 5) was considerably lighter than usual but definitely period bleed - I had small clots. I came off my period, the day later I had pink discharge and then 3 days later snot like discharge... any ideas what this could be?

She’s a girlie girl and loves Disney princesses, loves to dress up and she has a little dressing table with fake make up and hair curlers etc that she loves at the minute. she also loves building things and loves the car tracks they build at her preschool.

So far, I have got her

Disney princess nail polishes
Cinderella Tonie to add to her collection
Sparkly little hair clips & some new bobbles
Kids sensitive skin 2 x different colour bath bombs
Disney princess slippers
A chocolate Father Christmas

Shall I stop there? Any other suggestions?

Presents so far:

Rapunzel Dress
Magnatile Race Track
Sylvanian Family House (Facebook marketplace) so need to get some accessories for that
Doll with crib, bath, potty and clothes
10 for £10 books from The Works (we read 2-3 books a day/evening)
A puzzle
Oral B Disney Frozen electric toothbrush (she’s been saying she wants one like mine and her Dad’s)

again, shall I stop there? Or any other suggestions?

Looking for gift ideas for a 12 year old girl that isn’t skincare, make-up, sprays etc (she has too much already!)
Thanks ☺️