Please help, I'm at the end of my tether, my 21 year old daughter who will not wear a seatbelt either driving or as a passenger. She was always brought up to wear it and everyone else in the family always wears one. I think it's a sensory thing as she has always been very difficult about changing clothes or dealing with zips and labels etc but if she is going to drive a car, she has to wear it. It's quite unusual for me to be in a car with her anymore but every time recently I have been, I've had to tell her to put it on. I know she goes straight back to not wearing one when I'm not there. I've resorted to threatening to call the police on her myself but short of taking her keys off her I don't know what to do. I'm hoping I can show her this and she can realise how reckless and stupid she's being. Please, if any of you have any pearls of wisdom to share about dealing with a stubborn, know it all daughter, I'd be so grateful.

DD is online dating again and is messaging with a 40-year-old man. She is utterly convinced that he is interested in her as a person and that he is a genuine man. They like the same music, attend the same concerts, play the same games, and follow the same anime series.

I believe there are only 2 reasons a man this age would be interested in a 22-year-old.

1. He wants the kudos of bedding a woman in their 20s.

2. There is something wrong with him, and women his own age are too old and wise to tolerate his bullshit, so he needs to target women too young to know better.

For context, I am 44, and the idea of dating one of DD's mates is horrifying. I like them well enough. I'll happily sit and have a drink with them or a night out with them, but some of the things they say and do are childish and irritating, and I'd sooner gouge out my eyeballs with a rusty spork than be in a committed relationship with one of them.

According to DD, he works full-time and owns his own home, so he is not a basement-dwelling incel.

He wants to take her out for dinner on Monday. She's told him she's on her period, and he says that's fine, they're only going for dinner, and he doesn't want sex with her on their first date. He wants to get to know her. I don't believe him, but it's convinced DD even more that he is genuine.

i don’t want some paid influencer to tell me, i want real people to!

• cyberjammies- the best most comfy pj’s I’ve ever had I now have 3 pairs
• snag tights. I’ll never wear other tights again
• Laura gelled face powder makeup- specifically bronzer to go which has a poof and a mirror built in

yours?

What's the weirdest thing you've seen on a CV? I received one in application for a job and they had put a hobbies section in which they'd listed "smoking".

I’ve been pondering this recently. As a family we are careful with money. We earn a bit above average and we save around £1k per month. I shop on Vinted, our furniture is all preloved and we take inexpensive holidays (mostly camping).
Regularly I am obliged to spend money on things I don’t enjoy, and wouldn’t choose myself, but that’s just life. I am just pondering how much other people do this, and whether it bothers them.
One example is family days out. My in-laws visit once a month, and will often suggest we book somewhere nice for lunch as a treat. We split the cost, but it usually costs us £150-200. (man-child BIL doesn’t ever contribute, but that’s another story). As a family of four we would only ever do this as a celebration, not as a monthly thing. I don’t enjoy them, and I feel a bit resentful, I guess.
I often suggest cheaper options, but they get rejected.
The problem is, although I would much rather use the money for other things, we can afford it. So should I just suck it up?

Just that really. I have realised that there is a little posse of 6-7 of the other mums in the class that I’m not part of - actually, I’m actively excluded from. They are the sort of people I’d have a good laugh with and really enjoy hanging out with at the kids activities (professionals, similar interests etc). But they have formed a group that definitely doesn’t include me. The 3/4 other mums are lovely but not people I draw energy from (one is from a different culture and our sense of humour and chat is just different), one is a bit depressing etc and one is a SAHM whose outlook and life is super different to mine. It’s made me feel 13 again and left out by the popular kids - made me question how I come across and feel horribly self conscious. I went over to them at an activity tonight - they acknowledged me and then turned away and closed their circle. It was pretty awful. Not looking for explanations (or really to bitch about them) but wonder how you reframe it in your own mind? Adults are so so hard to make friends with.

So sad rip

Hello I thought I'd start a thread where we can build up the excitement for tomorrow 😂

I'm enjoying the English Country/ family vibe I'm getting from the setting and wedding prep.

Fox Gloves in the flowers 💕

I'm looking forward to seeing Harriet's dress, she's a very attractive women, but the flowers are always of special interst to me.

Who do we think will be bridesmaids? Peters P's and Harriet's daughters presumably? Zara's kids?

I read that Philip and Zara have a half sister who will be attending, I didn't kow about her!

I also read that Peters first wedding to Autumn was sold to Hello and criticised for this. Very tacky. It looks like he's learned and is not cashing in this time, so hopefully we'll get a good look at evryone.

Apologies if there is another thread on this. Couldn't see one.

Thoughts?

I have been friends with this guy since I was 16. We are now both 39. He's my sons godfather. We have always got any really well. Last weekend I had my first child free night in months so planned on a hot bath, movie & early bedtime. He randomly turned up (which has never been an issue before) we ended up having a few drinks & just chatting about life in general (which is normal) then I said i was exhausted so was going to bed. He asked if it was ok to crash on the sofa because he had been drinking (again it was fine, we had both slept on each other's sofas over the years) as I went to leave the room to go upstairs he said "or i could sleep in your bed" (we have never shared a bed in all the years I have known him) I said "ok I will sleep down here if you want to sleep upstairs" again he made the suggestion we sleep together & I was firm & said no. He then said "maybe i will wait until your asleep then climb in next you, you wouldnt know whats happening because your asleep" his response for some reason made me doubt his presence. I said I would call his brother to pick him up if he wanted to go home & sleep in his own bed or call a taxi & he could pick his car up the next day. He gave me a smirk & said "oh I get it, thats fine you cock tease" then started shouting i had been leading him on for years. I asked him to leave immediately because he has never spoken to me like that in all the years we have known each other. As he was leaving he said "maybe you should think about all the things I have done for you over the years & that I owe him". I have tried talking to him about what happened last weekend. I have called & text but he has chosen not to speak to me but its put me on edge because its making me question myself, our friendship & if anything has happend when I have been asleep previously.

I’m writing anonymously because I don’t want anyone I know seeing this …

Myself and my partner have been together 7 years , we have a 3 year old daughter. He was supportive throughout my pregnancy , apart from not understanding some things I couldn’t have asked for a more supportive partner. He has a son prior to us being together. He was too scared to be at the birth which I was hurt and upset about but I had my mum with me, he now regrets not being there. After I had my daughter he initiated sex roughly 8 weeks after , I wasn’t ready and I was also breastfeeding day and night so felt rubbish, and I did tell him I was scared and maybe not ready , he said let’s just try it and if you don’t want to continue then we’ll stop. I didn’t want him to feel rejected so went along with it , I know I should’ve been stern and said no but for some reason I didn’t. My daughter had a lot of health difficulties which became more apparent as she got to around 6 months old. During the time when she was born to this age he’d do similar and became annoyed if I didn’t want to have sex with him. I rmeneber the arguments we’d have , he’d go downstairs in a huff texting me saying I’m making him feel unwanted and accused me of being with other men and wanting other men …. This wasn’t true at all I just was struggling with breastfeeding and my daughter as I said had alot of health difficulties which meant she didn’t eat until she was about 2 or drink.. so I was still solely breastfeeding day and night, I didn’t want to go out anywhere because I knew I’d have to breastfeed, I couldn’t leave her with anyone. It took a huge toll on me mentally. If sex ever came about I noticed I started feeling this overwhelm of really not wanting to and what I am thinking now is that it’s because I felt pressured for however many years and made to feel bad for not wanting to.. he’d come back from work late and I would be asleep and he’d try it with me and I remember almost flinching at the thought of him touching me. It got really bad and I feel guilty for feeling that way. He did not leave me alone and day in day out I’d be guilt tripped accused of seeing other men and wanting other men even tho I didn’t go out and I the fact I’m in a committed relationship …. It was relentless. He’d try it when he knew I didn’t want to do it. This went on and on and fast forward to October 2025 we had broken up. I slept with him a few times when we were broken up because I didn’t want to upset him , a few times I wanted to a bit. If we had an argument he’d then tell my family and friends that we’d slept together and kind of use it against me in a weird sort of way. He’d say she’s sleeping with me but doesn’t want to be with me. I couldn’t tolerate being round him anymore … he would shout he came across defensive I felt like I was suffocating so I ended it. He’d always find a way into my home weither it was asking to use the toilet when collecting our daughter and then not leaving until she went to bed … I said I was tired so I was going to go up to bed. He took this as come up with me not to leave … he came up and was clearly expecting something. I said I didn’t want to do it, I didn’t mind him chilling but I was going to sleep.. he said that there was no point him being here if we weren’t going to sleep together I said okay… kind of reiterated what I said about not minding him chilling but I was going to sleep. I fell asleep and woke up a while later to his hands up my top… I said what are you doing sort of thing I’m asleep and I’ve told you no. He said okay sorry… 10 mins later the exact same thing happened and I said I’ve said no get off me …. I fell asleep again and woke up to him humping me… he had clothes on but it still made me uncomfortable. I. Don’t know if I overreacted but I basically threw him out the house , he said he was sorry and didn’t like that I was trying to make out he was in his words a weirdo and that he was just trying to get me in the mood and see if I would change my mind ….. I didn’t talk to him for a while after that because I felt weird towards him..

Fast forward we’re back together now. Should I have even done that and rekindled ? I feel like I don’t even want to sleep with him now because of all them years of pressure and obviously the last situation. He says he feels unwanted and he’s sorry but still says he was just trying to get me in the mood.

he also is relentlessly checking my phone .. walks passed and taps and has a scroll then walks off. He doesn’t notice I’ve realised he’s doing it.

I feel like there’s a stigma around sex with him now 😣😣😣😭

Exchanged contracts Thursday for completion next Friday. Buyer below me and I’m buying ex rental which is at top of chain

randomly bank withdraw offer Friday afternoon, 24 hrs after exchanging)saying credit rating changed therefore affordability impacted. Have a call at 9am Saturday. Wtf absolutely nothing I can think of that would have changed and my Experian score is very strong still. Any advice - is there any way I can still complete in 6 days?!

any solicitors or bankers on here?

Each month, I allow myself £20 to play slots on an online gambling site. It’s only ever £20.

Friday night, I was playing and won the jackpot which was £1000.

I have a 3 year old and 10 month old.

DH and I run our own business. We live comfortably, very fortunate to be able to afford a holiday abroad once a year, we can afford our bills and food shopping, the kids clothes, birthdays and Christmases (within reason, we don’t spend thousands, 3 year old has £100 limit for Christmas and same for birthday). 10 month old will have the same, probably only £50 for first birthday due to it all being a bit pointless when he doesn’t understand, that’s what we did with DD for her first but anyway I’m rambling, you catch my drift.

Saturday morning, I told him I won the money. I transferred him £100 to pay for the airport parking (we go away next week), £150 to treat himself to some new trainers as he wants some smart ones he can wear out instead of his work ones. I also transferred £200 into our savings. £100 into each child’s savings accounts.

I then said that I’m going to treat my self to tear trough filler due to it being a madejce insecurity of mine (very dark circles and hollow). I’m 34 for reference and I have Botox twice a year (the lady I go to is a Dr and I wouldn’t let just anyone near my face with botox/filler etc). I never buy myself new clothes unless it’s a special occasion like a wedding etc.

I stopped getting my nails done 2 months ago because he moaned about the cost every 3 weeks (£28 plus £8 for eyebrow wax).

This blew up into a big argument once kids had gone to bed, he said that something that really hurt me “I’m not being funny but you don’t contribute financially or work”. This really upset me, if I went back to work I’d be paying my whole wage on nursery fees for my youngest so we agreed when we decided to try for a second baby that I would stay home for 2 years like I did with my daughter and then to back to work.

I’m feeling like I’m less than him because I don’t earn money, I feel like I’m not entitled to treat myself out of my winnings.

He’s doubling down and giving me the silent treatment today. He didn’t like it last night when I told him I’m a 34 year old woman and can do exactly what I like. He said I should have discussed it with him before booking in.

To be clear, our bills are up to date and no debt other than a couple of credit cards including a business one but they’re always paid off each month and no issues there.

The saga continues

Hi everyone every time my husband and I get into a big argument he packs his bags and leaves the house. He usually goes to his parents, (once to a hotel) but usually tries to come back a few hours later. We have 2 kids and I’m just so tired of this immature behaviour. Has anyone else experienced this? Also how to deal with it? Thanks

Need some advice and recommendations for a festival wedding please!
Ive got a few dresses but all very wedding guest which would still be fine.
Was planning to wear this which actually looks really nice on me, has a tie so its much more fitted on the waist than in the picture but is this totally wrong vibe, any ideas for shoes accessories or something completely different.
I am 5ft 2 size 8/10

https://www.whistles.com/product/183700.html?utm_source=google&utm_source_platform=google_ads&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=NEST_Whistles_UK_EN_BoF_Shopping_Brand&utm_id=22797692313&utm_content=agid_188306982451-ad_764340769902&utm_term=&utm_matchtype=&network=g&device=m&placement=&targetid=aud-2376452920242%3Apla-294505072980&utm_tpl=live&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22797692313&gbraid=0AAAAADtW8dvQN7HaCY3dc4ibCdhcJZLEe&gclid=Cj0KCQjw54nRBhDCARIsAMcY_SAi8YQFJg91-QZ-yP802yTd_pUiC3jkjad0KEv4FvSOTs9CZ0ovtBUaAjNxEALw_wcB

Just wondered how people feel about this nowadays. Personally I find office days exhausting, hot desking stressful, and feel it’s something to endure. It would be easier if I could be someone who enjoys it but it makes me feel mentally drained.

YABU - I like going to the office
YANBU - I don’t like going

Genuinely not sure what my own opinion is on this so intrigued to see what the consensus is. My house is an end-of-terrace and the next door neighbours smoke indoors (sometimes normal cigarettes, sometimes weed). I’ve no major issue with smokers, but because they’re doing it inside, the smell comes through to my living room. We’ve not mentioned it to the neighbours and haven’t decided if we will or not (to be fair it isn’t constant) but I’m wondering if it would even be acceptable to ask someone not to do something which they’re well within their rights to do in their own home.

Voting is:

IABU = no you can’t ask someone not to do something in their own home
IANBU = yes totally fine to say something because the smell is coming through the wall

My son is getting married next year. June wedding. Someone on her recommended this dress for someone else. I went ahead and ordered it - a size smaller as that was all that was available. It has some weight to it and I love it but is it a bit cheapskate for mother of the groom. The money is not www.debenhams.com/product/jolie-moi-angel-sleeve-tiered-hem-maxi-dress_p-3e6c2c44-815f-42c7-b1db-67eae670cce8?colour=Multi&size=10&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22915808283&gbraid=0AAAAABevdS7lom0v68CypUOUtJ7wI713e&gclid=Cj0KCQjwio_RBhDMARIsAJPveNPX9QJHogyDX5JR4S_T4TALqJat6EcPACrQj2f_XntgPAeZTx04zrkaAnTFEALw_wcB

So, I’ve just been on an AMA thread where the OP is talking about her two children who have been able to get onto the property ladder, with their respective partners, in their early 20s.

I’ve noticed a few responses along the lines of “I would never have wanted to do that” / “I was living a colourful life!” and “that’s what your 20s are for!”

My POV is that everybody is different - we all value different things and live our lives accordingly. In my mind, living a colourful life/not settling down until later - or even ever - is a valid choice! And settling down/putting down roots quite early on is also a valid choice!

But now I’m genuinely curious as to others’ views on this…

Are you like me, and see both paths as valid choices (regardless of your preference)? Or do you have a strong view that one path in your 20s is better than the other for most people generally? If so, why is that?

What path did you follow? Was that best for you, and why? Or do you regret the path you took at all? Really interested!

FWIW, I haven’t lived a hugely colourful life (i.e travelling/partying), but didn’t settle down straight away (as in marriage/house/kids). I did these things in my early 30s. This was more due to finances/circumstances than anything! I’m quite a homebody and, had circumstances allowed, I would have perhaps settled down/put down roots a fair bit earlier!

My DD got married two weeks ago, a lovely day and we are so happy for her. However, she was upset following one of the speeches and I’m aware it has had a bit of a knock on effect and cause some tension between her and her husband since.

The best man gave a rambling speech which was more of a wannabe stand up routine. He spoke about the groom’s ex partners, made an inappropriate comparison to my DD (‘the thing they all had in common was a big chest’) and told a story about walking in on the groom on a lads holiday with a woman where the punch line was ‘had his face in her c*’ which had many of the guests gasping. A genuinely disgusting speech and my DD was upset after in the bathroom.

It has caused issues because of a specific detail and the best man will have known including this will have had that impact. The ‘defence’ of his speech was that he was really drunk and that it was tame compared to others he has heard.

I was talked out of giving him a piece of my mind on the day, but the more I have reflected since, the more wound up I’ve become.

My DP says I should leave it, but I really want to say something to him. I know who he is from Facebook and could easily message him. I just feel angry at him for tainting such a special day.

AIBU to ask would you judge a mum who goes away without her dc? Even though she is separated and pretty much does it when they are with their dad? So long weekends etc?

We have never been huge users of takeaways, deliveroo etc, but when we did order them, I quite enjoyed them.

But we ordered one last weekend as a treat after a really busy week and really busy weekend. It was so disappointing. The meat was awful quality - so fatty and gristly. The sauces were watery and bland and.... I have a horrible feeling that I found a fingernail in mine 🤢.

Thinking back to the one I had before that (from a different place and a different cuisine completely), it was also just horrible.

On both occasions it was really expensive, which just adds insult to injury.

Have takeaways gone downhill or is it my imagination or just bad luck where I live?

Dd graduates this year, we’re beyond proud, we have funded her and will celebrate with her generously- but it’s only just occurring to me that graduation gifts are a thing?
Likewise flowers on the day, she seems to think they’re a thing, I think they’ll be a pain in the arse waste of money personally