Anyone else deal with this? Hubby monologuing. Constantly, all day, every day.

It's a stream-of-consciousness - literally everything he is thinking, re-enacting entire conversations he has had (pretending to do the voice of the other person too), things he must remember tomorrow, various ailments, stupid drivers, how hot/cold he is, huffing, puffing, groaning, humming, whistling. It is incessant, repetitive, there are no gaps, and I realise that I plan my life around trying to get breaks from it.

He is always trying to get me to react too "what do you think of this?" "do you like that?" and I HAVE to agree with whatever it is. A quick "yes" or "ok" from me and he's back to it. It's like he's checking that I am still paying close attention.

Thing, is, I feel completely lost here. Everything is about him, his plans, his headache, his sunburn, his job. There isn't a moment for me. If I do speak, I can get roughly half a sentence out before he tells me "I know that already" or "that reminds me of a time when I .......", or how he's done it better or knows better ... and bam we are back to him again.

I might be peri - I might be over-sensitive? But I am forgetting who "I" am. I feel like I just don't matter anymore, because he is so great and wonderful and interesting and has done everything just far more brilliantly than anyone else. He has lost all sight of me being a person with my own thoughts and opinions (which - shock - might be different from his sometimes!). Arggghhhh. What can I do? I feel like I am going mad.

Hi,

Can anybody recommend the best place to buy plaid shirts in a size 16? I normally buy mine from New Look and H&M, but the quality isn't great. They're too thin and fade after only a few washes.

Hi,
I know I've left it late, but has anyone got any good, reasonably priced, ideas for teacher end of year gifts please?

I've bought bits in the past, but they turn up and always look a bit cheap. I've looking for something that looks great, but doesn't cost the earth.

Thanks

Dc got options back last monday and great got their 2 choices. However other friends ended up with 1 option that wasnt one they picked at all. And another got choices 3 and 4.

i guess the problem is they presented to the kids they were very likely to get choice 1. And it was rare not to.

i think as well it is because they only have the 2 choices as 2 are taken by mfl and a humanity

Also i think they said they do first choice first but dont prioritise the ones who didnt get that’s 2nd choice. So classes could be full from 1st choice then others get the 2nd choice leaving some down to 3rd /4th or below.
Did others kids get what they wanted?

I just want a pair of medium to low waist denim shorts. I've got thinner thighs size 12.
Want them relaxed not skin tight not baggy not a line not barrel not making me look like a garbage man.
Has anybody got any just plain kind of "day off" style shorts recommendations.

Not sure if this is the correct thread, but here goes....

My DH and I have been together for over 30 years and, as we're getting on we've both become more aware of and conscious to avoid what I suppose is called Cognitive decline.

I enjoy crosswords and reading, so I think I'm at least using my brain daily. DH has never bothered much with what he ( Mostly jokingly ) calls 'Book-Learning'. Anyway, all of a sudden he's become an 'expert'. He told me he'd read an article ( Although I suspect he means he's seen a two- minute video on Tok Tok ) which claims using your left hand for tasks that you would normally use your right hand for can stave off cognitive decline and now he thinks this is a miracle cure-all.
And, of course, he's become obsessed, everything has to be done left-handed, and if he see's me using my right hand, he booms 'Left!'. I can be chopping vegetables or opening a jar of coffee and I'll suddenly hear 'Left!' in my earhole. I've told him it's annoying, but he's as stubborn as a goat that's been struck by lightning.
Yesterday he spent over two hours repairing the lawnmower left-handed and somehow thinks it's turned him into bloody Einstein in a cloth cap.
I've tried suggesting some 'alternatives', as I read that learning a new language is effective. I've always fancied trying Portuguese, or even Hausa or Finnish. But I suspect trying to entice him with any of this will be met with the equivalent of 'Foreign Muck', and it will be the Moussaka situation all over again.
Honestly, I could scream. I know men get fixated, especially as they get older but this is honestly too much. I'm no Carol Vorderman so can someone explain whether there's any truth in his claims of Neural-plasticity in the brain?
I really need to get some answers because if I keep hearing 'Left!' I may well go hard right! In fact, the other day whilst driving he started rabbitting Left! Left! and it was only when I realised that he was pointing to the entrance to the Garden Centre, that I heeded what he was saying.
So, is there any truth to it? And is anyone else's aging husband going as mad as an Aardwark at an all you can eat Ant-Buffet?
I better go, I can hear him rumaging in the airing cupboard and if he see's me typing with two hands it'll be all she wrote. Literally!

DH has had migraine with aura since Friday (lost partial vision and then migraine started with vomiting) which usually only lasts a day or 2 if he ever gets them which is occasionally. He has been to see GP and was given Migraleve but has not made a dent in the pain so has been told to come back tomorrow to try a triptan. He says that his work will think he is trying it if he stays off any longer but I think he should not go in as his working environment is fluorescent lighting, stood all day, hands-on type of work and it will definitely make things worse and cause him to have to leave again, making it two absences instead of one continuous absence. He is a very integral member of his team and I severely doubt they would give him trouble for being this unwell but he is paranoid that they will. AIBU?

AIBU or have delivery charges skyrocketed lately?! In the last few days I’ve paid £5.95 for ASOS standard delivery, £5 from an online clothing company for standard, and I’m seeing £8-9 for next day delivery now!

OK no one is going to believe this to be true but I need to share it. I was spoken to today by my line manager as I've been reported in our 'call it out' policy. I made a member of staff feel targeted and picked on.
I bet you won't be able to guess what I did that made them feel so bad.
It's so crackers I actually thought my manager was joking.
Anyone want to guess?

An inheritance one, kind of.

I am a single parent, I have a disability which limits how much I can work, I live in a HA house, my youngest child is 16 and going to college in September.

I’ve been aware of the fact that I have had the buffer of UC for years, as well as working PT, but that will be coming to an end (or at least massively reducing) when my youngest finishes education. I have been really trying to up my earnings (I’m self employed), and I’m doing better than I was but it’s difficult health-wise, and I’m definitely not going to be able to get a mortgage anytime soon.

Today my DF announced that he was selling one of his properties and splitting the money between his 4 DC. My three siblings all own their own properties, so that’s really handy for them as they can pay off a chunk of their mortgages. The stipulation to this money is that it can ONLY be used for property, so if I can’t buy then I won’t get it, basically.

It’s very generous of him but realistically I’m not sure how I will ever be able to make use of the money? I repeat, he will not let me have it unless it’s going towards a property purchase. Which is fair enough I guess as he doesn’t want to see it wasted. But I don’t see a realistic chance of me buying a property, ever, sadly, much as I’d love to.

He said he will put my share in an account and when I need it I can have it. But I’m mid forties now, my health seems to be going downhill and despite me really doing my best, my income isn’t ever going to be at a point where I can get a mortgage.

I’m not sure what to suggest? Maybe ask him to put it in a trust so it might benefit my DCs in future? I’m just worried that if it sits in a random account then eventually I might have problems retrieving it from the wicked stepmother (a whole other thread), and best case scenario will end up losing a chunk of it to inheritance tax. My DF is 73.

So my 6yo seems completely incapable of watching TV/playing on her tablet for any length of time without completely losing the plot when she comes off. So tonight she has watched about 45 minutes of TV, she then started arguing with her 11 year old sister and started kicking her and I had to physically drag her away at which point she started kicking me (which she never ever does, not even when she was a toddler) she just completely lost it, it was like she was completely out of control of her body/brain. She does this (although she's never physically attacked anyone before) almost every time she comes off a screen, just seems to turn into a completely different person.

Now I know people may say just get rid of all screens but is that really realistic in this day and age? She's going to be using screens at school and as she grows up, I just don't know if banning it outright is the answer. But what the hell is it about screens that could be causing this sort of explosive behaviour?

Fingers crossed.

I know there’s already been loads of threads about it, so apologies for being so original but OH MY GOD!

I’m not usually a particularly whiny person and I don’t ever remember being particularly troubled by hot ( or cold!) weather before but honestly, I feel like I’m going lose my mind!

Maybe it’s combined with hot flushes or something because no one else I know seems to be struggling that much.

I was fine at first; just thought it would only be a couple of days we’d have to suck it up. We
got the fans out, ate a criminal amount of ice lollies and did as little as possible. But now it feels like it’s been a couple of weeks of non stop over 28 degree heat every day where I live. It’s also unbearably humid. Trying to clean the house is grim. I feel like I’m swimming through treacle and my brain is mush. I can’t concentrate on work, I can’t sleep at night. I am constantly uncomfortable and the house has now heated up to such an extent that no room is even close to cool.

I realise this probably sounds ridiculous but I can’t really go out in this heat. I mean I can go to work (though my office has no air con and is also grim) and I can manage the school run and the supermarket etc, but I can’t go for a walk, or run about at the park with the kids. I definitely wouldn’t want go out in town or mooch about the shops, or eat out etc. I don’t want go in the garden because it’s so hot. The swimming pool is lovely but the changing rooms are beyond the pale. There’s no way I could cope with a day out at the zoo or a theme park with the kids.

I’ve never been so hot or so uncomfortable in my life! I have lots of loose, comfortable clothes, summer shoes etc but I still feel like I want to rip my skin off!

Is it just me? Weather forecast seems to be saying 10 more days of heat wave and I could cry!

My Mum has lipodema and wanted a vibration plate so I bought one for her and then one for myself.
I've used it a couple of times so far.
If you have one and you've been using it a while what benefits have you noticed?

Is this just going to be one of those things in the corner gathering dust or are there tangible benefits to it?

They have 50/50 custody, she has half the year to book holidays and yet in the 3 years we've been together, she must have booked half a dozen holidays that mean he's needed to have the kids on her time. He NEVER says no for fear of upsetting her.

Their divorce has dragged on for most of those 3 years (they've been separated 6+ years, she had an affair, still with the bloke as far as he knows) as he deferred to most of her demands and didn't fight them for fear of upsetting her.

He was really ill last month which meant we had to cancel the long awaited 5 day break we had booked (I also have 50/50 custody, same pattern, so 5 days is the most we can get away together, other stuff often gets in the way so this only happens a couple of times a year).

Just this morning, to celebrate him finally being able to push the button on the divorce final order today, we fathom out another weekend in 3 months time we can get away together. What happens this afternoon- she tells him she's booked a holiday that very same weekend we had free and could he have the DC? I totally swear she's done it out if spite because of the final order. Of course, so he doesn't upset her, he's agreed.

Fuming here.

It can be absolutely anything from losing weight to surgery to eating something specific to a beauty product, an enhancement that you have done every few weeks .

I'm in my mid-30s, and I used to be an attractive woman in my late 20s. Then I caught COVID, and due to long-lasting neurological symptoms, it's really taken a toll on the way I look. I've tried small doses of everything, but perhaps I need to be more persistent with one thing. I do have a really good diet. I get blow dries weekly. Wear good quality makeup, etc., but I just feel I look like crap all the time.

Wtf! I just woke up to a spider crawling across my face!!!!! Yes it was small but my goodness me
😞
Can I do anything to prevent this from happening 😤😤😤😤😤

A relative has left their car in my garage for the last 10 years. I want to sell my house and they won't move it. They could move it to their own property but don't want to. It was always meant to be temporary. I have brought it up several times over the years and they just brush me off with excuses every time. I have ran out of patience. What legal route do I need to take. I don't want to dispose of or sell the car I just want to get it towed to their driveway, but Google seems to suggest I could be prosecuted for criminal damage if I do

This is such a first world problem, I’m almost embarrassed to speak about it but it’s really playing on my mind so I would love some opinions.
For years, I’ve been seeing a beautician for nail art. She was amazing, really talented and I thought we got on really well. I knew she also worked from home and after a couple of years I asked if she was looking for some home clients and she said no not at the moment due to time/space. Fair enough. I thought.
Anyway start of this year, she lost her job, it was very sudden as the place went under. She messaged me telling me what happened and I expressed empathy. After a week or so I saw on social media she was telling people to message her if they want to book in with her at home. Straight away I sent her a message and she responded saying she was just waiting for some materials to arrive and she would message me to let me know once she was up and running. I saw again on her socials she was seeing clients. I waited for a message and nothing. I was super confused as I really thought we got on well and I was a regular client. I left it for a while thinking she was probably getting things sorted, and it takes a while I’m sure. Well it’s been months now and I thought hell I’m going to send her one more message. So I texted asking how she is and is she taking more clients on. She said yes and she’s working hard including at a local spa. No mention of me booking in with her. I was like ok this is odd, decided to be brave and ask outright. “Can I book with you?, only I never heard from you” I get a strange message back saying she would be willing to do my nails but is fully booked till September!
I feel like for some reason she certainly doesn’t want me as a client, I have racked my brains for a reason and the only one I can think of is I ask for nail art every time which takes more time. However she did always say she loves it as she gets to be creative and all her other clients are boring. In fact she called me her favourite client.
Obviously sadly you guys will be no wiser as to why this has happened or what I’ve done, but my question is…..would you book in for September or just accept that for whatever reason this client/beautician relationship has ended?
It’s such a shame as she really is sooo talented but I just feel this has probably tainted the relationship now anyway.
Thanks for reading if you got this far!

Was attending a physio today with my little girl who is two. I also had my 8 month old with me. I know the physio relatively well as she has been working with my little one for over a year. Today she pointed to my stomach and asked if I was expecting again. I responded with “did you mean to say that out loud” and she laughed it off and said something about it must have been the way I was standing. It’s not the first time she has made an out of line comment. Previously she questioned why my husband was taking my little girl to an appointment and not me, she made the comment “but you’re her mother”. For context I generally am the one that attends apps, but as my husband was off on that particular day we decided he would attend to save me needing time off work. Am I over reacting to be upset by this. Particularly today’s pregnancy comment? I am probably a little sensitive as obviously I have had two pregnancies pretty much back to back. But I’m a size 10/12…. And even so , I do t think it’s any of her business.

do you think i could get away with these under a floor length gown. I don't like the of buying uncomfortable shoes that i wear for only one day. So thought these maybe a idea

Hi .. just this really … I’m on a train with my little surgery bag … waiting for it to sink in .. I managed to convice myself it’s only a consultation at 7:45 tomorrow.
Expecting panic to set in any time 😬

Any positive thoughts,advice, experiences super appreciated…

I posted about this some weeks ago, i hope i don’t come across as an attention seeker,It’s just a good place when you need advice/ support/ ears.

Thank you 💓

I've just been summoned for jury service. Checked the terms and conditions and our company will grant special leave to attend but you are unpaid. You can claim £64 per day back in expenses. My take home per day is three times that.

I am fully supportive of why I need to do it, but I can't believe I'm expected to take such a financial hit. If it were to go on for the full 10 days, I will be over £1000 out of pocket. I can't afford that, we have nursery and holiday club fees for 3x children and a mortgage to pay.

How can you be duty bound to do something that costs you so much in lost earnings?

I’m in a same sex relationship and my partner is currently pregnant. We’ve had our ups and downs in the relationship and there’s certainly been struggles. From my perspective I feel my partner struggles to see how what she might say or how her actions can be hurtful. I try my best to focus on seeing things from each others perspective instead of who’s right or wrong, though it can be challenging at times.
I’m very conscious at present that she’s going through a pregnancy, fatigue levels etc and as a result have taken on essentially all the housework, shopping, chores etc. She went away with family for two nights and I made sure there was nothing for her to do when she came back. We are also doing a lot of outside work and of course I don’t want her to be doing a lot of lifting etc and so I have taken that on. I was exhausted yesterday when I came home from work and just made dinner and sat on the couch. She was waiting for me to go out and do some jobs but I said no, nothing was essential and I was taking the evening off. My partner is off for the summer so I understand she wants to get everything done asap but I’m running on empty, and probably more so mentally and emotionally. Today I explained in a message that I need to pace things and was tired after doing a lot of outside work, she replied “I don’t expect you to kill yourself”…. “I know you’re not used to hard labour” I saw red and hit the roof. I can’t believe the comment was so triggering. I have worked since I was in school to earn my own money. Put myself through college, working nights at weekends and worked 60hour weeks during college summers. I’m struggling to see why she would say that? Or am I blowing it out of proportion?

Last year DS moved to live with his dad as he started secondary school. I believe this was the best for him and he wanted to be around his dad more and his siblings on his dad side. He’s with me half the holidays and weekends.

I’ve used the time wisely, but I lost my job and I’ve been struggling for the last few months. I’ve just got a job offer and I start at the beginning of August. It’s in the office full-time from 8-6, plus commuting on top of that.

I’ve been worrying about what to do with DS because I’m meant to have him for half the holidays.

I don’t have any childcare on my side - and my son is old enough to stay home by himself, but five days a week for the whole day is too much. He won’t want to go to any holiday clubs.

I am thinking to just message his dad and tell his dad that he will need to figure out childcare and I can’t have him. I feel bad for doing that, however, for the last 10 years, I was the full-time parent and to be fair to his dad, his dad would have him consistently, but he’s always been an arsehole to me, he’s always done the bare minimum and for a long time he didn’t contribute anything and managed to get out of paying child maintenance or paying a small amount over the years. There was also a seven month period when he decided just not to see his child and I had just had to crack on and care for him alone.

This job will really help me get back on my feet and also allow me to provide for my son when he is with me and when he isn’t - His dad put in a child maintenance claim as soon as he could.

I know his dad will be mad at me and will probably be an absolute arsehole - But in the back of my head, I can’t help but feel that he’s now the full time parent so he can deal with sorting childcare.

I really need this job, I’ve been applying with no luck and been so worried about how I’ll live - and ideally, would be able to concentrate in the new job without worrying about my son at home alone all day. I’ll see my son on the weekends instead, and maybe can take a bit of leave on the odd day here and there. My son 100% won’t mind not staying with me, and I’ll make sure he understand the situation, plus I’ll be able to send him money for treats, buy him the bits that he wants and also take him on holiday - all stuff he would enjoy so much more than being stuck in the house all day alone.

So, AIBU? Should I put my job and my needs first or consider his dad’s plans and him having to sort childcare arrangements.