How do navigate things with older/adult dc who are pro-trans ideology if you are not?

[Fancycrab]

Just wondering those of you who are GC and have teenagers or young adult dc who strongly support trans ideology, how do you navigate this? Do you just agree not to discuss it? Does it ever interfere with your relationship? My DD is still little but her dad, who I’m separated from is very pro trans rights and believes the whole gender ideology bollocks. I worry that he will brainwash DD into believing it too when she’s older and she’ll end up seeing me as the uncool, unprogressive one who just “doesn’t get it” 🙄

By the way OP, surely you understand there is a fuck ton of other issues that come under that generic and offensive term ‘anti-trans’.

Sorry Edith… I quoted the wrong post.

@Helleofabore np

Don’t let him know what you think or he may start to get busy with the brainwashing on purpose.

Perhaps to your dc emphasise there are no such things as girls or boys toys, or jobs anymore. Keep her away from screens/phones/ internet. Spend a lot of time with her. Have lots of outdoor physical pursuits. But do not make a thing about ‘trans’. Have a light touch.

Why is it offensive? Ok maybe I should have said anti-GI. I’m anti GI. I believe it’s harmful and not based in fact. I don’t need everyone to believe I’m a kind-hearted soul that respects all people regardless of how they behave. I don’t care if someone wants to call me anti GI. That is literally the definition of what I am. If they want to believe that makes me cruel and disrespectful of certain people, that’s their problem, not mine. I think you need to start owning what you are, especially as a woman. If you are against something, stand up and say you’re against it and have no shame in that. If people want to believe that makes you a bigot or small-minded or transphobic that is their problem not yours. Too many women try way too hard not to offend anyone. If women keep taking this meek stance of “but I’m not anti it, I’m inclusive, I want rights for all” blah blah it devalues what we’re trying to fight against.

The problem with the term 'anti-trans" is that many people will think it means 'against transgender people", and indeed it can mean that. It can also mean "against gender identity ideology" but I think most people would assume the former rather than the latter. It's the old "if you disagree with someone you hate them" issue that has been used to shut down debate and to make it very hard to criticise, or even question, a worldview.

There is a difference between ‘anti-gender stereotypes’ and being ‘anti-trans’. There is a difference between being ‘anti-gender ideology’ and ‘anti-trans’.

Remembering also that people with transgender identities are not a homogenous group in their beliefs, ‘anti-trans’ is a term of judgement and I believe it lumps all people with transgender identities falsely together.

I don’t deny being pro-women and girls. However, I reject the term ‘anti-trans’. It was only created as a shaming term and it is inaccurate.

If you had said ‘anti-gender ideology’, ok. But ‘anti-trans’ is used to completely dismiss women’s and girl’s voices, that is the purpose of this emotionally manipulative and judgemental term.

As I said, it also ignores that there are people with transgender identities who don’t demand access to single sex provisions that are not for their sex. And who don’t demand wrong sex pronouns etc. it is a blunt tool of shame.