Call to action for Bravissimo customers

[Itsallgonetoofar]

So any woman with large boobs quickly learn she a subset of men are obsessed and fetishise large breasts. Any woman without personal experience can confirm this by a quick look at a porn site.

So Bravissimo is loved by many of us. Up until now it's largely been a male free zone staffed by helpful women who are almost always with plenty of norkage themselves so they understand their customers challenges. Joanni Walshe's article in the Sun shows that is changing as they are saying they will welcome transgender customers.

I contacted customer services online to check, got a message that it's no time al all the case and if I left my phone number someone would ring me! Somewhat to my surprise they did, nice young woman spent 30mins telling me in shocked terms that of course they would never let a man in Bravissimo changing rooms but also explained that if someone's was 'on a journey to being a woman' they'd would be welcome. There was much talk of the 'woman on a journey' and of course they would never do anything that would lead to anyone being uncomfortable but that's even though I would be uncomfortable I was to be nice and kind to this person on a journey.

Several things struck me,

• they've clearly were concerned about the numbers of customers getting in touch
• the person I spoke to was very ignorant about transwomen, trans activism and woefully naive
• they have give no thought to the dangers of hidden cameras being placed in their changing rooms and if we think about those men with a large boob fetish I think that is a real danger not envy

Well done for this OP, Bravissimo was my next point of call after M&S fell. It seems I'll have to save up and go for Rigby and Peller!

I'm especially sad as I have been returning to the high street to support retailers with my wallet and not just my words and I've been cutting down on plastic from deliveries and I don't want to go backwards on that.

So no new bras for me then!

I'll shop when someone somewhere is supportive of women with journeys recovering from mastectomies or respect the journey of a girl needing her first bra. Those sorts of journeys I'm interested in.

We should start asking to see their liability insurance so that we know they're covered if we end up on the spycam section of PornHub.

The other really worrying aspect about this is what it means for Bravissimo staff. I've been measured there several times and it's pretty intimate. The staff are on their own in a small cubicle with another woman in a bra. Not a big deal when it's a woman (who would really rather not be standing there in her bra with a stranger). But it's an entirely different kettle of fish when the female Bravissimo staff member is on her own in a cubicle with an AGP male asking her to assess how some lacy number fits him. I really don't think shops have thought this through. They're putting their staff in an unacceptable position.

Idea for a new law; the postcode should be displayed on all 4 walls of every changing room or public toilet.

That’s the last bra I’ll be buying from Bravissimo. They’ve already pissed me off by changing their rewards scheme 😄. But that’s nothing compared to this, it has the potential to be truly dangerous.

I feel sorry for the staff too. I buy most of my bras and all of my underwired bikini tops/ tankinis in there. I will call my local shop tomorrow. If anyone finds a contact for head office please post. I am so upset by this move on their part. I have always been really self conscious about my boobs and l actually cried with happiness when my Mum took in me in there 10 years ago and bought me 2 bikini sets that actually fitted. Bravissimo have been so important to me, the fitters so patient really made me enjoy the experience instead of dreading it. That’s all gone now l suppose.

Please please tell them why you won't be shopping there again. Dealing with men who have a fetish for large boobs is just exhausting, Bravissimo was a blissful male free zone.

Dealing with men with a fetish for large boobs is not exhausting

It's scary, intimidating, belittling, dehumanising,

I’m really sad about this- I love Bravissimo, and only discovered them this year. I’ve spent a lot of money with them in the last few months- it’s been a revelation finding bras that fit properly. I feel betrayed by a company that I felt really understood me- turns out they didn’t. At all.

What is it with these retailers who would rather cater for a small sub-set of trans women than their thousands of female customers? All this is taking on the feeling of stockholm syndrome.

They really should educate themselves a) about AGP and b) pervy blokes.

It is utter madness.

I understand what you are saying, but would the fetish thing apply to either sex? If they rolled that way ( and some do)- they could camera up ? Each cubical is separate , so how would it indulge their fantasy ?

As one of their target customers, Bravissimo was a safe man-free haven where I could feel comfortable whilst shopping and get good advice from female bra experts. I would not feel comfortable if there were men in there. Sure, the odd man perusing the racks to buy a present, but not in the changing rooms.

I also worry what would happen if a transperson applied for a job there. Would Bravissimo give them the job? Would they let people know there was a male salesperson who might measure them? Or would we be left in blissful ignorance like we are with nurses doing smear tests?

Everybody, may I suggest you contact your favourite bra brand and ask them for a list of smaller stockists? That's what I am going to do. Bravissimo have lost my custom. Not that they'd care, but if enough of us boycott them then they might.

PS: I've just downloaded a list of stockists for my favourite brand that I used to buy from Bravissimo (Fantasie). There are loads of smaller shops who stock this range and who I am sure are not buying into this bollocks. So I will be boycotting Bravissimo AND supporting a small business. Win Win.

I really really didn't want to hear this.

Finding Bravissimo and (PepperBerry) ha smade such a difference to how I feel about what I wear! I've always been so excited when visiting somewhere I can go into one of their stores (as I live in the SW with none in easy distance).

I absolutely will not go somewhere and get topless with men in the changing rooms nearby. No way.

Good luck. I’ve no need to use the shop personally but I will say the journey to becoming a woman starts with being born female.

I've just unsubscribed from their emails, and sent a very detailed response as to why.

I bought loads from them, but won't be again.

How are Figleaves?

@AnneLovesGilbert Figleaves are OK, but don't have any shops as far as I am aware.

Every single one of my bras has come from Bravissimo since I first became pregnant 15 years ago. This pains me more than M&S. I shall be contacting them.

I am more concerned with the issue for staff than personally based on the Bravissimo shop I shop in. Cubicles have sturdy locked doors, thick walls and feel very much private. Don’t feel like that about most places - eg m and s or John Lewis changing rooms. And no idea what other branches’ changing room are like.

Would be very interested to know their policy in Male bodied assistants though. I would absolutely not be happy with a male measuring me and fitting me for a bra, or bringing bras for me to try on. Anyone Bravissimo’s policy on this?

Oh no! I buy all my bras there. I shall have to email them. That's really pissed on my chips.

I went into my local Bravissimo today and spoke with the manager, who was very understanding and helpful. She said that yes, they did provide a service to biological men ( my words not hers ) but that they used a completely separate changing room and when it was in use by a man, it was closed off to women.

This is on a different floor from the main changing area, so would not infringe on womens privacy.

She was very well informed about the issues and aware of the potential risks to her staff of serving ( some ) male customers. She explained what steps they took to reduce the risks ( which of course I won’t mention here ).

She was clear that men were not allowed in the main fitting area, however they identified, in order to protect the privacy of women . She said it was common for men to insist that they had to go into the area to see bras on their female partners and their policy is to explain that the women need to come out ( into the public seating area outside ) , the men can’t go in for any reason.

I was very satisfied with her answers and her attitude. She clearly understood my concerns and was courteous and respectful.

@Lumene I bet they haven't even thought of that.

I am also wondering about how the staff will be treated if they refuse to touch a male customer. There are lots of Muslim staff at Bravissimo. Are they going to force them to put bras on male customers?

This is such a load of shit.