On the verge of kicking her out eldest DD16

[Pisssssedofff]

She hits her siblings and really hurts them aged 12 and 6. My son when he was interviewed by the court over custody thing drew my eldest dd in the sad house.

I kind of feel these incidents are happening more frequently with exam pressure. I'm on my own with 4 of them. In a three Bed house. It's pretty much like living in a pressure cooker

I'm not phoning SS they are useless

I spoke to my ex he can't have the younger three

I think the situation has gone a bit beyond tidying her room.

Op have you ever have her assessed for any sen or mh issues? Has a gp ever seen her in relation to this? Does her school have any complaints about her behaviour while there?

No she's a model pupil at school, straight A's and a dream to teach. If you met her you would think I was off my head is itch my description of her

sub I don't actually understand why you are being derisive to me, that suggestion was one in amongst many. Can you be a little nicer please?

You need family therapy then. Something in the home Life has gone catastrophically wrong if the school/home Jekyll and Hyde description is right.

What about your family/parents can they help?

Why won't you talk to SS?

Disagreeing with your suggestion isn't "not being nice".

I have no words of wisdom or advice OP but you won't get a bashing from me.
I have a 16yr old DS and whilst he's no more violent than the odd sibling scrap with DD, just his attitude and behaviour can be absolutely draining at times.
I therefore can kind of imagine how I'd feel if my DD was being physically abused by him. It's not on.
I personally wouldn't remove the younger ones because they've done nothing wrong but it's clear that you can't solve this situation on your own. You need outside help.
Just out of interest, is she ever sorry for her outbursts?

Big I feel absolutely no shame in calling out someone who's acting like a vile parent. Absolutely none. If there's shame to be had it's on the op who has repeatedly said how she doesn't like her daughter, doesn't love her daughter and doesn't want her daughter nor does she even want to get her daughter help. Her daughter sounds depressed, angry and hurting a hell of a lot. I offered good advice until the OP started showing how much contempt she has for a child.

They are useless if you don't ring them.
If you're not willing to fight her corner by ringing social services, gp, whoever what is your plan? Stay like this?
I would assume school have taught her discipline and boundaries whilst at home she knows she can have and do whatever she wants.

Ok. You're being obtuse. This thread is supposed to be supportive and you're being particularly picky and argumentative, which is weird. But by all means carry on nit picking. The ordinary thing to do would be to acknowledge it an move on.

MN can be such hard work some times and it feels like there are those who are just spoiling for a bun fight.

As you were. Back to you op.

OP: you said that you might rent her somewhere to live instead (which isn't necessarily cheap), and that she's a model pupil at school. I'm which case, might a state boarding school be an option you could afford?

That might give you all a bit of breathing space without dire consequences for your DD's future.

Ring SS and tell them you are throwing her out and she has nowhere to go. You cant just throw her out without alerting anyone do you want her to end up sleeping on a bench?

That's was to SUB

SS might actually be able to help with state boarding placements. It may be cheaper than the alternatives.

Boarding school is very appealing tbh

I'm happy to pay

Do look in to state boarding schools then, especially as you say her behaviour at school is great.

But also see the GP and get some support as a family to help fix the issues that have gone wrong. Simply sending your DD away will not solve everything, for you, her and her siblings.

Agree with you lets, I'll send you my address shall I I'm utterly done

There's no such thing as a bad child, only bad parents. I can't believe what I am reading and seeing supported here!

The fact that SS have been useless in the past doesn't mean that they will be now, given that she's 16 and the younger children are in danger from them. What have you got to lose by phoning them? Realistically you don't have any better plan in place.

How is she at school?

It sounds like school is your daughter's safe place, where she feels respected and validated for her work. It is sad for her that her home life has not been able to provide that, but clearly you are unwilling to work on yourself, so boarding school does sound like the best place for your DD.